In a new relationship which has been hot from the get go. The first couple of weeks we fucked liked rabbits and I had no trouble reaching orgasm 3 times in a night. Then, for the past week, I can get up, she gives me great head, we fuck and she has multiple orgasms. There is no doubt there is lust and passion... BUT, I get almost to the point of no return and it's like a snap of the fingers and the feeling is gone and I can't cum. I'll still be hard but it's like it's over. Last night we fucked and I came inside her but it wasn't anything very satisfying. Later she sucked me, she jacked me, I jacked myself (which she got off on), we fucked more, did all of that again and I couldn't cum. This morning I was at home alone and masturbated....and guess what, I couldn't cum. I'm going crazy! Anybody got any advice?
Help! I can't cum!
- Thread starter mediaman004
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Have you been stressed lately? Work issues? Poor sleep routine? Bad diet? You'd be amazed how outside influences can affect your sex life!
this seems like one of the things I would think of especially as he said they been going at it like rabbits
I wonder how old you are ? I started to have that problem in my mid fifties , after I had cum once or twice with a very demanding girlfriend ,I remained stiff and could go on for a long time without cumming . I had to think hard of cumming , she orgasmed to frequently spoiling the moment when I was about to . Now much older I have difficulty cumming all the time . I think circumcision causes eventual insensitivity .
Is it possible you masturbate too much ? Orgasm is as much in the mind as physical stimulation .
Is it possible you masturbate too much ? Orgasm is as much in the mind as physical stimulation .
'I can't...' can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Lay off all stimulation until you ca't wait any longer and have a go by yourself and see what happens. There is a condition called ejaculatory incompetence, but you are nowhere near that because of the short amount of time regarding your complaint. Performance anxiety can take forms other than getting and maintaining a chubby. Do you have a tendency to psych yourself out?
Thanks, folks! Just a little follow up. First, we are not together daily, so there's 2-3 days between encounters. After posting this we were together and had some great sex and I had one of the most satisfying orgasms ever. I've discovered that when we're fucking and she reaches a climax that she squeezes me and wants me to stop thrusting momentarily and that's about the time I'm ready to blow and it throws things off for me. Just a theory. At any rate, thanks for your comments. Cheers!
HawkeyeTJ
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I had a former girlfriend that had these incredible "clenched" orgasms where I could not thrust because she became too tight during orgasm. I eventually learned to know when she was close so I could finish as she shut the vice. But I can understand if you just stopped, you could lose the mojo. Glad you had a good experience recently and good luck.
It sounds like mediaman004 has discovered the likely cause of his problem, but my first thought based on the symptoms described was to ask whether he was taking an SSRI antidepressant. I had this issue -- I could achieve erection but not orgasm -- a few years ago and switched to a bupropion type antidepressant (e.g., Wellbutrin brand), which resolved it.
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