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So, im gay, 24yo and i have a best friend who is also gay and 29 yo. We are friends of over 7 years. He's super good looking 10/10 (like its not even fair to other people), and im at best a 6/10. Our friendship has been complicated for a while, we used to live together for almost 2 years, then i decided to have a jealousy breakdown on new years eve of 2016 to 2017 (at the time i just thought i was a possessive friend) which caused him to leave the house. We went 2 months without speaking, but eventually he forgave me and we were back to being best friends, only now he was living by himself and so was i. All this time i was never aware of my feelings for him, until july 7th of this year. We were at a night club, both really really drunk and for some fucked up reason i said to him while we were dancing: ''lets make out, just to put an end to this sexual tension that we have'' (keep in mind he NEVER expressed any desire for me) but he was SO drunk we kissed. I dont remember the kiss very well but i dont think he enjoyed it. After that we just pretended nothing happened. I was supposed to sleep at his house that night but i was so horny for him that i decided to go home driving and almost died when i drove off the rode (i know, im a piece of shit and and could have killed someone) so that night was done, we never talked about that ever again. Now 3 months later for the past 2 weeks i have been heaving the most sexual dreams about him, jerking of thinking a bout him, and having jealousy problems again. So basically i think im in love with him, but im not sure, maybe its just me wanting his body (ive seen nudes of him cuz one time he left his macbook unlocked playing music on the kitchen and went to the grocery store to get something for us to cook, and i didnt even look for anything they were literality on hes desktop under the spotify windown). But honestly i dont see how me telling him any of this would make anything better. I need help. please help what the fuck do i do