Help! I'm 22 he's 16.

[Satsfakshun]

10 posts in the last 3 years. Two of them in here. Hmm.......

It's illegal, regardless if he's "Consenting". It doesn't matter what he says..it's what his homophobic father and Judges say when it comes down to it.

Keep him a friend, and thats it. He flirts, tell him he's not old enough.

It probably wouldn't hurt to offer some non-touchy mentoring. A 16 year old with gay feelings is likely to feel like a failure and an outcast. As an adult, you should be there for him to ease his transition into adult life. It's also pretty important to let him discover his place. Maybe 10 years from now, when 6 years isn't such a big difference, the two of you might feel differently. You should be in a position to caution him about searching out adults. The world can be cruel to youngsters.

 

[hesastar18]

i say go for it dude juss dnt tell any 1

 

[D_Sparroe Spongecaques]

i say go for it dude juss dnt tell any 1

which makes it sound like you know its wrong

 

[Guy-jin]

How about buying a clue. Father/son and Priest/altar boy doesn't equate, especially since most of the altar boys were around 12 or 13.

It's called a joke. Maybe you should buy a sense of humor. Hur dur!

 

[B_Craiggers]

Back in the day, I dated a 16 year old (female) I worked with when I was 21. Was legal (barely), but...

Worst relationship of my life.

teenagers are teenagers, and unless you're into emo psychodrama I'd suggest dating someone a bit older :tongue:

 

[MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK]

You really have to have us tell you to stay away from him for 24 months before you make a move on him sexually? What, you wanna go to jail for statutory rape of a minor? Or worse be branded a short eyed bastard?

 

[helgaleena]

Being attracted only to 16 year olds is a dead giveaway that some therapy is in order, as others have also said. Try to find people of your own age attractive. It will be easier for you to become mature yourself. That goes for whatever age you are, in future.

 

[ncsudude009]

you lack emotional maturity so you seek out people at your level of development, sadly that leaves you perving on jailbait.

stop it. you will never get back the lost time or experience.. and in a very real way your actions may deprive someone of their chance at the same instant you are chasing.

and no, you shouldn't do anything with this kid. he might encourage you... but.. you are a grown ass man, act accordingly.

Excellent post. The second paragraph is especially true. Sooo many people - gay and straight - need to realize that.

 

[dreamer20]

Being attracted only to 16 year olds is a dead giveaway that some therapy is in order, as others have also said. Try to find people of your own age attractive.

There's nothing wrong with finding a 16 year old attractive as such an attraction is not reason for therapy, but is biologically normal. There are many U.S. states where the age of consent is 16, just as in the UK.

Ages of consent in North America - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

[tachyon]

18 year old is a cut off. below that is a no no.
I had a feeling that this thread will be crawling with feds...

 

[B_deltaboy767]

Why is the majority of you giving this guy a "hard" time about who he has feelings for, didn't most, if not all, of you on here have had feelings for the wrong person at one point in your life? Yes you did don't deny it, we all have, maybe this "kid" is mature, and he sees him as an adult, however, its normal for a hetero male to "chase" an underage girl and not get persecuted for it, but HEAVEN forbid some Gay male would chase an underage, UGHH society Kills me, with their POLLUTED mentality... Get real people, he CAN NOT control who he has feelings for, on a further note, In europe it is perfectaly acceptable, for some one say, 22 23 years of age, to chase some one who is, 16 17 years of age, and that goes for both gay and hetero, so why then is it so "wrong" here in the US? It's ok for straight men but wrong for gay men.

 

[Gecko4lif]

Come to florida

Legal here.

 

[D_Myer_Dogasflees]

just remember that you shouldn't effect his plans in life, if so all is well and his parants can't complain. you could be a great support for one another.

life is short make the most of it!

 

[D_Myer_Dogasflees]

There's nothing wrong with finding a 16 year old attractive as such an attraction is not reason for therapy, but is biologically normal. There are many U.S. states where the age of consent is 16, just as in the UK.

Ages of consent in North America - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

anything after puberty (13/14) would be normal(for obvious reasons), however there is a BIG MATTER at hand and that is that teh child has not develped enough to understand all the matters in life, and for this reason we usually draw lines so that the under age only go with the simmilar age, however this doesn't in all reality prove it wrong, only best leave to a later age from a formal perspective. It's fine, so long as we are absolutely sure some how that hte older partner is complpetly responsible, knowleageable and honnest at all times. if you can really trust such a erson, then it is ok, but think about it this way, if this was the mass accepted way the mass crowed won't usually function on this level as things are very fluid and it is too hard to tell so usually we rely on odds.

say the guy was a life long friend of the father/mother of the child and the father/mother is successful in life, and the father/mother knows the 22 yo person well, then perhaps it will be better than the odds of the child finding a true partner at 22 and how they should deal with it, then it is ok

 

[helgaleena]

I speak from the perspective of one who was attracted to partners much older than myself -- at first. 20 year old me, 50 year old him. Inside he was about 15 though and never grew up. This eventually became a problem when I grew up and he did not.

OP, try not to be that man. The older you get the harder it will be for your 16 year olds to find you sexy.

 

[Chase1600]

Wonder what ever happened with this. I see dreamer20 bumped it. Just for discussions sake, I think any adult in 7”24’s situation needs to stay away from such a kid and let the kid grow up.

I don’t particularly think 7”24 needs therapy, maybe so, but his posts don’t indicate it. I don’t think it’s odd for someone to find a person who is only 6 years younger to be attractive. That isn’t the issue. Maybe others of us would think the kid is attractive if we saw him. And never mind what we imagine 16 year olds might do together among themselves. Kids playing around with kids are still kids being kids. Adults have no business being kids.

What I would advice 7”24 to think about is the future, his own and that of the kid. He does not want to risk his reputation, much less a criminal action; he should not want to risk living with those consequences. And surely, he understands that he does not want to mess with the growth of this young person. Never mind that some adolescents might look older, might express consent, might flirt, or whatever. Not only do kids not have the legal burden of being responsible for many of their actions, but more importantly, they don’t have the psychological maturity. Not only should they not be held responsible for some decisions, they should be protected from making some decisions. They should be protected from people who would place them in such a position.

Let the kid grow up. When the time comes that he is 20 or so, you will not be too old. Chances are the time will have passed, that’s for sure, but let it be.

It’s OK that you think he’s cute. We can’t always help that. But because you think he’s cute in that way, it is not OK to engage him in other ways until he is older. 7"24 would be much better off to keep as much distance as possible from this young person. It is a part of our having respect for our own feelings and respect for the integrity of others.

It’s fair enough to have sought advice. Nothing wrong there. For what it’s worth, that was mine.

 

[Boobalaa]

Soo.. this what you spent all those months at the Seminary training for..welll?..keep training

 

[D_Dick_LeCoque]

move to the UK. End of story, close this thread.

 

[oddeyeblu]

It seems that people under 18 are not to even be noticed then all of the sudden they become visible when they are 18. With all respect for decency and the law, is it possible someone under age to be an object of veneration? Hell yes, COME ON WE ARE ALL HUMAN. BTW, veneration does not equate to sex and perversion all you panic stricken gavels.

 

[oddeyeblu]

Helgeena, i just looked at your pics.
Now I get where you're coming from.