Im anonymous on here where I can come here and seek suggestions and help. I have not had sex for 2 months, swore it off because I was afraid of catching something from random hookups with some women. I wore condoms most the time, but some women who I would see often we stopped wearing them (stupid right?) Thats the backround information, its ironic that after I decide to stop I get into trouble. About 2 weeks ago I shaved my pubic region, including the side of my thighs. Well it had been a while since I had done this, so I didnt think much when I got a red bump, figured ingrown hair, right? My thighs starting breaking out in minor skin rashes, nothing big, more like dry skin patches, it happens to be at this time in winter, because I often run outdoors. Well 1 week ago I noticed a discolarion on the middle of the shaft of my penis, on top and some bumps around the edge of my head, lo and behold it looked like herpes. I lied to myself for a couple days, but it started itching terribly, I called the Clinic and I got to go in and see them today (waited a week for free appointment). They did the blood draw and q-tip, well, I get to wait a week for those, however visual confirmation on herpes. I fight like my world broke. I dont know waht to do, I know Im not going to die from it, but I feel so embarassed, I dont even want to talk to girls anymore. I feel now like Im less of a man. Im going to the free hospital tonight to try and get medication for it, to help with the infected area, to relieve itching and keep it under control. I called my good friend, a chirstian Ariel, the one who helped me to stop screwing around anyway and cried on her shoulder. The last time I cried was over a year ago. I just dont know what to do. Anyone have any helpful suggestions? They would be widely appreciated. I'd also appreciate keeping this a flame free zone its a pretty painful time Im going through right now.