Heterosexual Fending Off

heist

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Wow guys, seriously? Don't forget that it's very possible to read too much into a situation. NOINRI, just relax and don't try to read too much into every little action that goes on. Make friends first and go from there. If you overthink it, you're going to screw things up regardless of whether he's straight/gay or interested/not interested.

Let things progress at a natural pace. If it happens, it will happen.
 

HungThickProf

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Okay Boo Boo- I have something to tell you- you're like way too hard on yourself. I imagine that you see the world as having to analyze every action or decision. You definitely don't sound like a risk taker. As time goes by, you'll feel more and more comfortable in your own skin. It's really hard to straight up answer "is he possibly after you" or "is he totally straight?" None of us were there, and we don't know him. And I have a feeling that you'll continue to encounter situations like this in your future- only because it sounds to me as if you show people what you want them to see, and not what they should- you.
 

NOINRI

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Reading my first post, I fear I sound a bit manic and overly obsessive with my thoughts.

The suggestions in this thread seem so obvious, yet they didn't occur to me. Not all that versed in guy talk either I guess.

I heard my coworker telling another coworker how he had previously planned to quit our job, but for some reason he stayed for the time being, but isn't sure how long he'll stay.

This was all that same day, because I still have yet to work with him again, but It'd be a shame if he left rendering this entire thread irrelevant.

Guess I can still take some lessons from this thread and apply them in the future if similar situations present themselves.

I tend to shy away from hanging with guys, because ever since a kid I felt like my differences most shined when surrounded by what I felt most unlike: Other Males. Even before I knew what I was, before I was able to decipher it and before sexuality even came into the picture.

I've always felt that to hang out with other guys is to tell on myself.

I always assume everyone knows, especially males, while at the same time sure I've done all in my power not to reveal.
 

JacobFox

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The suggestions in this thread seem so obvious, yet they didn't occur to me. Not all that versed in guy talk either I guess.


I tend to shy away from hanging with guys, because ever since a kid I felt like my differences most shined when surrounded by what I felt most unlike: Other Males. Even before I knew what I was, before I was able to decipher it and before sexuality even came into the picture.


These are the major things I picked up on before reading this post. I got the impression you don't have "guy talk" experience because I think everyone here who said it is just that is 100% on the money. When I started being around straight guys at work, it sort of caught me off guard as well, because I wasn't familiar with it.

My impression is that he assumed you were straight and was just engaging in that. For those of us not used to be around guys who talk like this (I am now, but wasn't years ago), it takes a tiny bit of time to get used to but not too much :)

Good luck!
 

HungThickProf

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These are the major things I picked up on before reading this post. I got the impression you don't have "guy talk" experience because I think everyone here who said it is just that is 100% on the money. When I started being around straight guys at work, it sort of caught me off guard as well, because I wasn't familiar with it.

My impression is that he assumed you were straight and was just engaging in that. For those of us not used to be around guys who talk like this (I am now, but wasn't years ago), it takes a tiny bit of time to get used to but not too much :)

Good luck!

Well said, Jacob =)
 

NOINRI

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It looks like it's time to put all that I've learned here to work. Well accept for the asking him out to hang out and stuff. Not there yet.

But yeah, we work together again tonight.

Update later, no matter how insignificant it'll probably be.
 

NOINRI

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Beginning: Kind of quiet. I initiated some talk but nothing would stick

Later on: We loosened back up to where we left off and I guess you could say I flirted a bit. Playfully punching/tapping on shoulder with fist. Pretending to run him down and him playfully dodging and laughing. We ran up on each other and scared each other at one point and a few times we would catch each other's eye and goofily smile for no reason.

He began initiating talk with me as well.

At one point I was dealing with a.......how to say......I guess a "difficult" person and he came by and mouthed the words, "Are You Okay?". I smiled and nodded yes and he smiled and gave me a thumbs up.

So really all tonight did was help cement my delusions of infatuation. I'd like to think he was actively flirting but odds are.....

The one thing I don't like is how we left off. There were a lot of us and so I didn't feel comfortable singling him out of everyone and making it a point to say whatever I wanted to say in front of them all and then the manager started talking him up as we departed so we didn't exactly get to say Bye.

Plus it's Friday which allows for more topics of conversation and I came to work already with things to possibly say to him just in case my mind went blank like it always does.

Oh well. I'm satisfied for the most part and whatever his intentions, I like how we work together at least so that's good and he's adorable.

EDIT: Wasn't going to ask and put this out there, but do you think it was even POSSIBLE that he was flirting maybe at least a smidge? Or showed any signs of anything? Did his actions belie himself?
 
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