Heterosexual Questionnaire

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by Pappy, Jan 17, 2006.

  1. Pappy

    Pappy Member

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    Heterosexual Questionnaire
    1. What caused your heterosexuality?
    2. When and how did you first decide you were heterosexual?
    3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may outgrow?
    4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same gender?
    5. If you have never slept with a person of the same gender, how do you know you would not prefer that?
    6. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a majority of mental health patients heterosexual?
    7. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality?
    8. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their sexual orientation?
    9. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you really consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers and service providers?
    10. How can you enjoy a fully satisfying sexual experience of deep emotional rapport with a person of the opposite gender, when the obvious physical, biological and temperamental differences are so vast? How can a man understand what sexually pleases a woman and vice versa?
    11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
    12. Marriage receives a great deal of societal support, yet the divorce rate continues to increase. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
    13. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual like you?
    14. A majority of criminals, welfare recipients, and other irresponsible or antisocial types are heterosexual. Why would anyone want to hire a heterosexual for a responsible position?
    15. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own gender? Is that what makes them heterosexual?
    16. Why do you insist on making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?
     
  2. davidjh7

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    Pappy---I think I love you:biggrin1: I am nominating your for the best hung sense of humor on the board :smile:
     
  3. rob_just_rob

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    I'm going to play this one straight :tongue:

    :biggrin1:
     
  4. B_horribleperson

    B_horribleperson New Member

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    thats its just 16 question??? im sure some crazy uber-far-right-wing site has atleast 100 questions to ask the homosexuals
     
  5. Collegestudent54

    Collegestudent54 New Member

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    lol, rob_just_rob's answers rock
     
  6. GoneA

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    i feel sorry for all the bi-sexuals trying take this questionnaire....
     
  7. D_alex8

    D_alex8 Member

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    Surely bisexuals have the pleasure of being able to fill out two different questionnaires? :rolleyes:
     
  8. RideRocket

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    Whew! Don't I get a prize for answering the survey? :biggrin1:
     
  9. Matthew

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    It's beyond hysterical that people are actually answering this
     
  10. GoneA

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    also known as queries :cool:
     
  11. GoneA

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    yup
     
  12. Pappy

    Pappy Member

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    Ain't it though.
     
  13. yurkon

    yurkon New Member

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    I do.
     
  14. B_Monster

    B_Monster New Member

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    Almost, not quite but, almost has me laughing, some just don't get it.:biggrin1:
     
  15. Dregun

    Dregun New Member

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    Actually I understand the reason for the questionarre; its basically putting a 180 on homophobia and putting it on hetro's.

    These are the same questions many "gay" people get asked however I don't think its necessarily a bad thing that these questions are asked. I think for someone to truley understand why someone is either Gay or Straight you have to learn what makes them tick. Being a straight male I can answer these questions without feeling as though I'm being belittled or that someone is trying to "convert" me. I hope most of the gay men on this forum would react the same way, obviously the more you accept who you are the less likely questions such as these would offend you.

    Just a thought,

    Dregun
     
  16. D_Ivana Dickenside

    D_Ivana Dickenside New Member

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    1. What caused your heterosexuality?
    growing up, i was a total tom-boy and i always liked being around boys better than girls.

    2. When and how did you first decide you were heterosexual?
    in the fifth grade when i had my first crush.

    3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may outgrow?
    nope, i love cock too much.

    4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same gender?
    nahhh, not at all.

    5. If you have never slept with a person of the same gender, how do you know you would not prefer that?
    i would love to experience being with another woman, but i know it wouldn't be the same as being with a man.

    6. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a majority of mental health patients heterosexual?
    hmm, good question. :confused:

    7. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality?
    it's pretty obvious... everyone knows i love cock.

    8. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their sexual orientation?
    maybe some heteros feel that way but i don't.

    9. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you really consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers and service providers?
    i think it's more of a trust issue more than anything.

    10. How can you enjoy a fully satisfying sexual experience of deep emotional rapport with a person of the opposite gender, when the obvious physical, biological and temperamental differences are so vast? How can a man understand what sexually pleases a woman and vice versa?
    communication is key. without it all hell will break loose.

    11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
    same reason homosexuals place so much emphasis on sex... it feels good!!!

    12. Marriage receives a great deal of societal support, yet the divorce rate continues to increase. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
    i truly believe that lack communication is a factor. however, people just don't value marriage the same way the generations before us did.

    13. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual like you?
    eventually overpopulation will lead to competition and natural selection will come into play. us heteros will probably kill each other off one by one due to lack of resources, food, mates, etc.

    14. A majority of criminals, welfare recipients, and other irresponsible or antisocial types are heterosexual. Why would anyone want to hire a heterosexual for a responsible position?
    sure, i don't discriminate. not all heterosexuals are bad people either. besides, i think it'd be just as fun to work with heterosexuals as it would be to work with homosexuals.

    15. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own gender? Is that what makes them heterosexual?
    only the competitive types do. i'm don't consider myself one of those types.

    16. Why do you insist on making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?
    i'm not ashamed of being heterosexual. i'm proud of who i am!
     
  17. Lng_1

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    OK...OK... OK... Now I'm sooooo confused! I thought I was straight (for the most part).... maybe I'm not......wahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I don't want to be... can someone help me?

     
  18. Northland

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    In all fairness-nothing. Then again that may be more to do with the simplistic nature of sexuality and my desire to pork almost anything that moves and is of legal age and human.
     
  19. No_Strings

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    .
     
  20. HazelGod

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    :rofl:

    :tool:
     
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