Heterosexual Questionnaire

Pappy

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Heterosexual Questionnaire
1. What caused your heterosexuality?
2. When and how did you first decide you were heterosexual?
3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may outgrow?
4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same gender?
5. If you have never slept with a person of the same gender, how do you know you would not prefer that?
6. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a majority of mental health patients heterosexual?
7. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality?
8. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their sexual orientation?
9. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you really consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers and service providers?
10. How can you enjoy a fully satisfying sexual experience of deep emotional rapport with a person of the opposite gender, when the obvious physical, biological and temperamental differences are so vast? How can a man understand what sexually pleases a woman and vice versa?
11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
12. Marriage receives a great deal of societal support, yet the divorce rate continues to increase. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
13. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual like you?
14. A majority of criminals, welfare recipients, and other irresponsible or antisocial types are heterosexual. Why would anyone want to hire a heterosexual for a responsible position?
15. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own gender? Is that what makes them heterosexual?
16. Why do you insist on making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?
 

davidjh7

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Pappy said:
Heterosexual Questionnaire
1. What caused your heterosexuality?
2. When and how did you first decide you were heterosexual?
3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may outgrow?
4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same gender?
5. If you have never slept with a person of the same gender, how do you know you would not prefer that?
6. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a majority of mental health patients heterosexual?
7. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality?
8. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their sexual orientation?
9. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you really consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers and service providers?
10. How can you enjoy a fully satisfying sexual experience of deep emotional rapport with a person of the opposite gender, when the obvious physical, biological and temperamental differences are so vast? How can a man understand what sexually pleases a woman and vice versa?
11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
12. Marriage receives a great deal of societal support, yet the divorce rate continues to increase. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
13. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual like you?
14. A majority of criminals, welfare recipients, and other irresponsible or antisocial types are heterosexual. Why would anyone want to hire a heterosexual for a responsible position?
15. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own gender? Is that what makes them heterosexual?
16. Why do you insist on making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?

Pappy---I think I love you:biggrin1: I am nominating your for the best hung sense of humor on the board :smile:
 

rob_just_rob

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I'm going to play this one straight :tongue:

Pappy said:
Heterosexual Questionnaire
1. What caused your heterosexuality? Not sure.
2. When and how did you first decide you were heterosexual? I had heterosexual urges from about age 12, but was only certain about a year ago.
3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may outgrow? Anything is possible, but it seems unlikely.
4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same gender? No.
5. If you have never slept with a person of the same gender, how do you know you would not prefer that? I have, and I don't.
6. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a majority of mental health patients heterosexual? Umm, I dunno, because a majority of the population is heterosexual?
7. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality? Most assume it. There are about a dozen women who have better evidence, though.
8. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their sexual orientation? I don't. I always wanted to be bi. Bi people seem really cool, they dress well, and have twice as many potential partners. What's not to like?
9. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you really consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers and service providers? No - children should be taught by robots.
10. How can you enjoy a fully satisfying sexual experience of deep emotional rapport with a person of the opposite gender, when the obvious physical, biological and temperamental differences are so vast? How can a man understand what sexually pleases a woman and vice versa? For the same reason that crossword puzzles, Rubik's cube, and now Sudoku were/are so popular.
11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex? It feels nice.
12. Marriage receives a great deal of societal support, yet the divorce rate continues to increase. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals? See #10. I threw away my Rubik's cube.
13. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual like you? Luckily, we have disease, war, and hunger to offset all us heteros.
14. A majority of criminals, welfare recipients, and other irresponsible or antisocial types are heterosexual. Why would anyone want to hire a heterosexual for a responsible position? God knows - most days it feels like I'm stealing from my employer.
15. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own gender? Is that what makes them heterosexual? I only hate and distrust them when I've been talking for half an hour to the hottest woman at the party, but have to leave her to take a pee break.
16. Why do you insist on making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet? I'm half British, so I avoid PDAs and insist on doing it with the lights out. Does that help?

:biggrin1:
 

B_horribleperson

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Pappy said:
Heterosexual Questionnaire
1. What caused your heterosexuality?nature
2. When and how did you first decide you were heterosexual? 10 when i started to like girls more
3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may outgrow? when pigs fly
4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same gender? nope
5. If you have never slept with a person of the same gender, how do you know you would not prefer that?no i have not, it just doesnt feel sexy to me
6. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a majority of mental health patients heterosexual?because 95+% of the human population is hetero
7. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality? anyone who asks
8. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their sexual orientation?seduce??? everyone suduces someone else
9. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you really consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers and service providers?sometimes your a nut sometimes your not
10. How can you enjoy a fully satisfying sexual experience of deep emotional rapport with a person of the opposite gender, when the obvious physical, biological and temperamental differences are so vast? How can a man understand what sexually pleases a woman and vice versa? practice makes perfect
11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?sex rules motherfucker
12. Marriage receives a great deal of societal support, yet the divorce rate continues to increase. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?im sure the same would be true among homosexuals if they could marry, but then again why the fuck would you want to get married?
13. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual like you?you mean the same menace of overpopulation that has been talked about for the past 2000 years, in 2000 if every adult got 5 square meters and kids 3 square meters then the whole world population could live in th city of jacksonville florida
14. A majority of criminals, welfare recipients, and other irresponsible or antisocial types are heterosexual. Why would anyone want to hire a heterosexual for a responsible position?the same would be true if everyone was homosexual
15. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own gender? Is that what makes them heterosexual? do homosexuals hate members of the opposite gender? if your an asshole then i will hate you, if your a chill person then i have no problem with you
16. Why do you insist on making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?NO


thats its just 16 question??? im sure some crazy uber-far-right-wing site has atleast 100 questions to ask the homosexuals
 

D_alex8

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GoneA said:
i feel sorry for all the bi-sexuals trying take this questionnaire....

Surely bisexuals have the pleasure of being able to fill out two different questionnaires? :rolleyes:
 

RideRocket

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Pappy said:
1. What caused your heterosexuality? The overwhelming urge my penis has to be inside a vagina
2. When and how did you first decide you were heterosexual? Birth
3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may outgrow? Negatronic
4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same gender? Nope
5. If you have never slept with a person of the same gender, how do you know you would not prefer that? The same reason I don't jump off a cliff
6. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a majority of mental health patients heterosexual? I'm normal so why should I care about others?
7. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality? Everyone - I have a t-shirt and bumer sticker that say so which makes it a fact
8. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their sexual orientation? If we convert you, then we don't have to worry about voting on gay marriage initiatives. Resistance is futile...
9. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you really consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers and service providers? What's the correlation between child molesters and teachers? This is like comparing apples and oranges.
10. How can you enjoy a fully satisfying sexual experience of deep emotional rapport with a person of the opposite gender, when the obvious physical, biological and temperamental differences are so vast? How can a man understand what sexually pleases a woman and vice versa? Why should the man care? :smile:
11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex? Once you go vagina, you don't go back...
12. Marriage receives a great deal of societal support, yet the divorce rate continues to increase. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals? Because as more homosexual people appear, we heterosexuals have to 'share the love' and insure the population continues.
13. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual like you? As long as we have disease, war, hunger to decrease the surplus population, everything will work itself out.
14. A majority of criminals, welfare recipients, and other irresponsible or antisocial types are heterosexual. Why would anyone want to hire a heterosexual for a responsible position? Who says they aren't?
15. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own gender? Is that what makes them heterosexual? Yes - that's why men are from Mars and women are from Venus.
16. Why do you insist on making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet? I'm not the one having parades all the time...

Whew! Don't I get a prize for answering the survey? :biggrin1:
 

Matthew

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It's beyond hysterical that people are actually answering this
 

yurkon

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Heterosexual Questionnaire
1. What caused your heterosexuality? Decided one day
2. When and how did you first decide you were heterosexual? 13 and I liked tits more than dick
3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may outgrow? Possibly
4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same gender? Anything is possible
5. If you have never slept with a person of the same gender, how do you know you would not prefer that? N/A I have, it didn't take.
6. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a majority of mental health patients heterosexual? Majority of the population is hetero
7. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality?
8. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their sexual orientation? I wasn't aware they do
9. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you really consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers and service providers? I'm not ware of pedophiles sexuality
10. How can you enjoy a fully satisfying sexual experience of deep emotional rapport with a person of the opposite gender, when the obvious physical, biological and temperamental differences are so vast? How can a man understand what sexually pleases a woman and vice versa? It takes a little experience, it isn't easy sometimes
11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex? Horny?
12. Marriage receives a great deal of societal support, yet the divorce rate continues to increase. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals? Horniness?
13. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual like you? War global warming rolls back the total from time to time. Eventually bio-terrorism will be gene specific and people with certain traits will be eliminated.
14. A majority of criminals, welfare recipients, and other irresponsible or antisocial types are heterosexual. Why would anyone want to hire a heterosexual for a responsible position? I think because there are so many of them. If heteros make up 95% of the population, I doubt that the homo population could provide for them all.
15. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own gender? Is that what makes them heterosexual? Trust is earned. We decided in our teen years whether to be hetero or not.
16. Why do you insist on making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? I don't

Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?
I do.
 

Dregun

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Actually I understand the reason for the questionarre; its basically putting a 180 on homophobia and putting it on hetro's.

These are the same questions many "gay" people get asked however I don't think its necessarily a bad thing that these questions are asked. I think for someone to truley understand why someone is either Gay or Straight you have to learn what makes them tick. Being a straight male I can answer these questions without feeling as though I'm being belittled or that someone is trying to "convert" me. I hope most of the gay men on this forum would react the same way, obviously the more you accept who you are the less likely questions such as these would offend you.

Just a thought,

Dregun
 

D_Ivana Dickenside

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1. What caused your heterosexuality?
growing up, i was a total tom-boy and i always liked being around boys better than girls.

2. When and how did you first decide you were heterosexual?
in the fifth grade when i had my first crush.

3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may outgrow?
nope, i love cock too much.

4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same gender?
nahhh, not at all.

5. If you have never slept with a person of the same gender, how do you know you would not prefer that?
i would love to experience being with another woman, but i know it wouldn't be the same as being with a man.

6. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a majority of mental health patients heterosexual?
hmm, good question. :confused:

7. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality?
it's pretty obvious... everyone knows i love cock.

8. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their sexual orientation?
maybe some heteros feel that way but i don't.

9. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you really consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers and service providers?
i think it's more of a trust issue more than anything.

10. How can you enjoy a fully satisfying sexual experience of deep emotional rapport with a person of the opposite gender, when the obvious physical, biological and temperamental differences are so vast? How can a man understand what sexually pleases a woman and vice versa?
communication is key. without it all hell will break loose.

11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
same reason homosexuals place so much emphasis on sex... it feels good!!!

12. Marriage receives a great deal of societal support, yet the divorce rate continues to increase. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
i truly believe that lack communication is a factor. however, people just don't value marriage the same way the generations before us did.

13. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual like you?
eventually overpopulation will lead to competition and natural selection will come into play. us heteros will probably kill each other off one by one due to lack of resources, food, mates, etc.

14. A majority of criminals, welfare recipients, and other irresponsible or antisocial types are heterosexual. Why would anyone want to hire a heterosexual for a responsible position?
sure, i don't discriminate. not all heterosexuals are bad people either. besides, i think it'd be just as fun to work with heterosexuals as it would be to work with homosexuals.

15. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own gender? Is that what makes them heterosexual?
only the competitive types do. i'm don't consider myself one of those types.

16. Why do you insist on making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?
i'm not ashamed of being heterosexual. i'm proud of who i am!
 

Lng_1

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OK...OK... OK... Now I'm sooooo confused! I thought I was straight (for the most part).... maybe I'm not......wahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I don't want to be... can someone help me?

Heterosexual Questionnaire
1. What caused your heterosexuality?
2. When and how did you first decide you were heterosexual?
3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may outgrow?
4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same gender?
5. If you have never slept with a person of the same gender, how do you know you would not prefer that?
6. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a majority of mental health patients heterosexual?
7. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality?
8. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their sexual orientation?
9. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you really consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers and service providers?
10. How can you enjoy a fully satisfying sexual experience of deep emotional rapport with a person of the opposite gender, when the obvious physical, biological and temperamental differences are so vast? How can a man understand what sexually pleases a woman and vice versa?
11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
12. Marriage receives a great deal of societal support, yet the divorce rate continues to increase. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
13. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual like you?
14. A majority of criminals, welfare recipients, and other irresponsible or antisocial types are heterosexual. Why would anyone want to hire a heterosexual for a responsible position?
15. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own gender? Is that what makes them heterosexual?
16. Why do you insist on making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?
 

Northland

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In all fairness-nothing. Then again that may be more to do with the simplistic nature of sexuality and my desire to pork almost anything that moves and is of legal age and human.
 

No_Strings

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1. What caused your heterosexuality? When I was 9 I saw my Aunt step out of the shower and I felt mybody grow between my legs. For years I would ask to visit my cousins just so I could be close to her again.
2. When and how did you first decide you were heterosexual? When I realised how cheesy and stinky foreskin was. I didn't want to touch something that was naturally meant to be dirty.
3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you may outgrow? Not unless everybody gets a cut dick and breast implants. 34D, same size as my Aunt. (I know becasue when I was 12 she let me measure them.)
4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same gender? No, but possibly the smell.
5. If you have never slept with a person of the same gender, how do you know you would not prefer that? I have slept with both my Uncle and my Aunt during my teens - when I could tear myself away from circle rubs with my sisters.
6. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a majority of mental health patients heterosexual? Because my Aunt is a mental health worker.
7. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality? Not many people - when I do they seem to have a problem with my family relationships. So narrowminded.
8. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their sexual orientation? I don't know. If I read one more 'rate my pussy' thread I'm going to scream.
9. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you really consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers and service providers? I'm glad of what happened between me and my Aunt. It should hap[pen to mroe young people.
10. How can you enjoy a fully satisfying sexual experience of deep emotional rapport with a person of the opposite gender, when the obvious physical, biological and temperamental differences are so vast? How can a man understand what sexually pleases a woman and vice versa? Mother knows best.
11. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex? It doesn't come with the guilt and shame of sodomy.
12. Marriage receives a great deal of societal support, yet the divorce rate continues to increase. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals? It's illegal to marry my Aunt, people commit to coverup marriages instead and the pressure cracks them eventually.
13. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual like you? Tightening the genepool improves natural selection.
14. A majority of criminals, welfare recipients, and other irresponsible or antisocial types are heterosexual. Why would anyone want to hire a heterosexual for a responsible position? To have an affair. Sometimes when I see a coworker looking bored at their desk, I move over and whisper in their ear to meet me in the toilets where I'll give them a good time.
15. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own gender? Is that what makes them heterosexual? They can't wash their smelly uncut cocks properly.
16. Why do you insist on making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet? I am doing no harm by cruising in an elementary school neighbourhood.
.