Hey guys, guide a virgin take his baby steps?

prowling_tiger

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Okay, I'll be honest here. I'm 29 years old. I've done a fair bit of fashion modelling and while I'm no adonis, I'm not hard on the eyes either.

I'm also a virgin.

My sexual experiences so far are like this:

I've been hit on my adult men ever since my teenage years. The only things I've done so far would fall under the category of heavy petting (hugging/caressing with clothes on), a few wank jobs (his hand on my cock) and exactly two instances of mouths on my cock (I did not cum).

I started getting propositioned by women from my mid twenties onwards. These incidences are few and far between since in the culture I live in girls are expected to be chaste till marriage. The come-ons I did get were also more of the "Will you be my boyfriend?" type rather than the "Fuck me now!" kind.

The reason I haven't done much so far is because I'm a relationship kinda guy. It's obvious to me by now that I'm not one of those fellas who can have sex with multiple people or without emotions involved.

But as I said, I'm 29. It'll be the big three-oh next year. And I feel like I'm wasting my young years away without having fun. Hence the situation I'm in now.

I've lined up two guys. I intend to have oral sex with one or the both of them next week.

Guy A has a sexual history. He's had sex with his cousin (he admitted to oral - both giving and receiving, and admitted to anal but later took it back) and with a few fuck buddies.

Guy B is a complete virgin. According to him anyway. But he's kinda sweet and guileless so I'm inclined to trust him.

I don't have "feelings" for either of them. They're attracted to me and I've finally decided to just get a blowjob already!

I wouldn't mind giving and receiving with Guy B (no risk of diseases). And if I do stuff with Guy A, it's gonna be strictly about me getting head. Which he's okay with. Basically, he wants me any way he can have me.

I've been abstaining from masturbation and so haven't cum for the past three months. A single brush of a hand or mouth or ass against my crotch and I'm in danger of busting a nut then and there. And since I'm determined not to wank (anymore), I thought I'd finally accept a couple of the offers coming my way.

So there it is.

Sorry for the cliff text.

I wanted to ask you gentlemen if you have any words of advice to offer someone in my position. Did you perhaps regret doing stuff before you were "ready"? And at what age were you "ready"? Was your first time (BJ or anything else) memorable? Do you wish you had done things differently? And if so, what?

Feel free to be frank, guys.
 

bustup45

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sir when i was 29 i was still a Virgin, i had never seen a naked woman only on tv.i had problems with my sexuality i was a bit confused i thought i could be gay , i got my first Girlfriend when i was 31 years old.
But i was a Virgin, i was nervous and rubbish at sex with her , i could not perform properly with her, i could not ejacualte ever, it was embarresing.
we went out for four months and split.
i was a 35 year old man and still basically a Virgin, still a bit sexually confused i met Girlfriend number 2 and i had the same problems with sex,
i was nervous inexperienced and i could not come , we went out for 6 months and split.
i have not had a Girlfriend in 7 years im still technically a Virgin, im frustrated as hell and very lonely. i am now 43 so you have a lot of time to get it right unlike me , my lifes been a mess.
 

prowling_tiger

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@bustup45

I'm so sorry to hear that.
Not wanting to be "rubbish at sex" (as you put it) due to lack of experience is also why I'm taking charge of my sex life now.

Thank you for sharing. I hope things change for the better for you soon.
 

Ohioguy

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Do it! Get it done & move on. You are wasting a lot of time. You have nothing to fear, but fear itself. Do be safe - practice safe sex. Start fucking, sucking and enjoying sex.
 
D

deleted3782

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Wait till you can be with a guy that you think hung the moon. Be with a guy that you want to make feel incredible, and you will be all too happy to let him make you feel incredible. Sex is 90% in your head, 10% everywhere else. I totally "get" the fact that you want this event to be over...and you can take that path...but never has sex been so awesome for me than the times that I was really into the other person.

Its the classic case of quality or quantity. I think I'm more of a quality kinda guy. I have only been with a handful of people overthe past 10 years. I miss the closeness...but I'm not willing to settle for anyone (unless you catch me when I'm super horny :biggrin1:).

Best of luck, and keep us in the loop. I'm curious which path you end up choosing.
 

prowling_tiger

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Do it! Get it done & move on. You are wasting a lot of time. You have nothing to fear, but fear itself. Do be safe - practice safe sex. Start fucking, sucking and enjoying sex.

With regards to safety, putting on a condom for a blowjob defeats the entire purpose of the blowjob. While anal sex is by definition a high risk activity - with or without a condom.

So basically there are two issues here: The "fear" of sex, i.e, the normal first-time hesitation of should I or shouldn't I that accompanies the situation if there is no heart-feelings involved between the two people. And two, the threat of disease.

But you're right. I am wasting time. Thanks for the push, bro.
 

prowling_tiger

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Wait till you can be with a guy that you think hung the moon. Be with a guy that you want to make feel incredible, and you will be all too happy to let him make you feel incredible. Sex is 90% in your head, 10% everywhere else. I totally "get" the fact that you want this event to be over...and you can take that path...but never has sex been so awesome for me than the times that I was really into the other person.

Its the classic case of quality or quantity. I think I'm more of a quality kinda guy. I have only been with a handful of people overthe past 10 years. I miss the closeness...but I'm not willing to settle for anyone (unless you catch me when I'm super horny :biggrin1:).

Best of luck, and keep us in the loop. I'm curious which path you end up choosing.

Dude, you're a man after my own heart. You get what I'm saying, exactly.

Yes, there have been a couple of instances in my life where I thought the guy hung the moon, or nearly so. The men in those cases were exceptionally intelligent, stunningly handsome (to my eyes) or simply with a masculine joie de vivre that drew me to them like a moth. Something made them devastatingly attractive to me and the notable thing about it was that I felt it all around the region of my chest (heart pounding, balloon of happiness et al) and my stomach (a riot of butterflies). I wanted to impress him as much as he impressed me. And make him realize how awesome I was so he would fall for me.

So knowing that that entire dimension exists, it's difficult to settle for something much lesser even if it is only for the purpose of getting off. Because I always felt that during sex, not only do we give a part of ourselves to the other person, but we also take a bit of them into ourselves (I'm not talking about the fluids).

But I'm also as you put it, "super horny" and in danger of busting a nut from even a casual brush against my crotch. Hence my vacillation.
 

hrdhatdad

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It might seem a little old fashioned but you seem like a guy that would enjoy going out on a few dates with someone before diving into sex. Why not try that and let the attraction grow? Personally, my most promiscuous years happened very early in life and then I fell hard for someone. After that, I became more of a relationship type of guy.
 

prowling_tiger

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It might seem a little old fashioned but you seem like a guy that would enjoy going out on a few dates with someone before diving into sex. Why not try that and let the attraction grow?


^^^ This, bro.

This is it exactly. That's for me.


Personally, my most promiscuous years happened very early in life and then I fell hard for someone. After that, I became more of a relationship type of guy.


The thing is, I haven't fallen for any of the guys who're currently propositioning me. They basically range from friend-material to fuck-buddy material to ew-no-thanks! material. And while my ideal relationship is an LTR, how does one handle one's sex drive in the meantime?
 

Stephenmass

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Throw yourself into the casually dating pool. Sometimes you find a diamond in the rough that you would never have thought you would be with. When you are comfortable enough with whoever you are dating, you may take it to the next level (sometimes that's on the first date) and go from there.

I am also a lot like you in regards to I generally never casually hook up just for the sake of hooking up. I don't like much for me the attitude of meet, drop pants, get a bj, and leave. It's kind of a cold way at least for me.

Make it with someone that you are casually dating at least. Be comfortable with him and see where it goes. You may find yourself "going places" you wouldn't think you would have gone in your wildest dreams.

I agree with exwhyzee; the "right" guy makes all the difference!
 

Ren69

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Im 26 and still virgin, i got sex abuse as kid, that destroyed my whole life. But im trying to think positive and change my whole life.
 

celtic12

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if you're really lucky you might meet someone who is curious and treat you very well and then your wants and needs will be satisfiden!!!!! than you can continue with your life knowing the difference wish luck!!!!!