hey, this should be good for a laugh

footlonghotdog

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A man forgets his wife's birthday. She is furious. she tells him that unless she wakes up in the morning and there is something in the driveway that can go to from 0 to 250 in less that six seconds, he's a dead man.

Sure enough, the wife wakes up the next morning and there is a little package sitting in the driveway. curious, she puts on a robe and goes outside and gets it. she brings it inside, unwraps it, and inside is a new bathroom scale.
 

MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

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In local news, a married man was rushed to the hospital to have a bathroom scale removed from his anus placed there by his upset wife, angered over not recieving a more appropriate anniversary gift.
Her response, "I gave him the option to weigh his choice on a belated gift, and he chose to make my weight his choice."