hmmm..??

[Dorian_Gray]

I couldn't think of a good thread name... anyways. I'm in a bit of a conundrum, i'm a college student and in chemistry (organic..boring), my lab partner is HOTT and i can't tell if he is flirting or just looking me in the eye at exactly the right time, or him grazing my hand/arm every time he reaches for something, or just the way he friggin talks to me... if it is as I think it is, next class may be interesting. What I was trying to ask is: How do you know EXACTLY when someone is coming on to you? b/c If he isn't and is just high on something or is just that way by nature, I don't want it to get ugly. And if he is coming on to me he would be the first (very) masculine gay/bi guy i've met. Soo.. What'cha thoughts on the subject?

 

[sdbg]

I've never been one to be too direct, yet I've invited classmates to have coffee with me after class and thought nothing of it. It's innocent enough. Initiate conversation and see what happens. Get him to talk about himself, what he likes to do outside of class, etc. This could be a good way to see what he's into. If he looks right into your eyes and smiles a lot, it's pretty safe to say he's interested.

 

[guiltrip]

Actually people who act comfortably like that around other people (make eye contact, touching) are usually by definition NOT sexually attracted to the other person. It's as if to say, "I find you so unappealing that nothing I do matters"

 

[B_Think_Kink]

Actually people who act comfortably like that around other people (make eye contact, touching) are usually by definition NOT sexually attracted to the other person. It's as if to say, "I find you so unappealing that nothing I do matters"

Ok or you could be more of an asshole.

I'd go with the coffee idea, coffee helps all conversations flow.

 

[ryanart]

show off your bulge see if he looks

 

[fratpack]

I agree with most of the other members who have posted here. Ask him if he'd like to get some coffee after class or just meet up with him somewhere outside the classroom, some casual social activity. Then just let the conversation takes its course. Don't be nervous and good luck. He could even end up being a erally good friend.

 

[cgttown]

The coffee idea is a good one, or go out for a beer or two if you've talked enough to think you have something in common. The thing about beer is it loosens the inhibitions a bit.

Also, (this may sound risky but bear with me) when you're havin a beer, sit across from him at the table and sort of casually move your foot until it's touching his. See how he responds. If he jerks it away, he's probably not thinking of you that way. But, if he's comfortable with it, then leave it there. You don't have to play footsies or anything that's over the line, but just gauging how comfortable he is with touch is a start here.

I'd recommend overall, though, to pursue him as a friend. See where that goes. This is under the assumption that perhaps you're interested in him as more than someone to get nasty with and that you are attracted to him as a person and not just physically.

One last word, maybe you'd be better off putting any sexual intentions on hold until you're no longer working together in lab class. If things got ugly, or if they got real steamy, it could make lab class very difficult.

 

[fortiesfun]

Just about everyone is giving the same general advice: try to move things forward yourself in small increments and see if you get any signals. This is pretty much how it works with everyone, everywhere. (Occasionally someone will ask, "Hey, wanna fuck?" but since the chance for being shut down and humiliated is great, most folks work up to it.

 

[Dorian_Gray]

thanks for all the great input, I think i'm going to go with the beer one b/c i get a little nervous sometimes..lol anyways, here goes! I'll report back in a little while.

 

[Dorian_Gray]

well, it wored! I had a friend tell me to go to a movie with him. Then afterwards we came to my flat and had jagerbombs! And it all went from there, he is one of those people where you hear him talk for like a minute and wow, his voice is just mesmerizing. Maybe after I get to know him a little more i'll put up some pictures. Gah, them jagerobmns are hitting right about now thanks guys for the help!!