Holiday cheer

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by lance49726, Dec 18, 2006.

  1. lance49726

    lance49726 Member

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    Holiday cheer
    Twas the night before christmas-old santa was pissed
    He cussed out the elves and threw down the list

    Miserable brats, ungrateful little jerks
    I have a mind to scrap the whole works

    Ive busted my ass for damn near a year
    instead of "Thanks Santa" what do i hear?
    The ole lady bitches cause i work late at night
    The elves want more money-the reindeer all fight

    Rudolph got drunk and fucked all the maids
    Donner is pregnant and vixen has aids
    And just when i thought things would get better
    those Assholes from the IRS sent me a letter
    saying I owe taxes aint that damn funny
    Who the hell ever sent santa claus any money?

    And the kids these days- they all are the pits
    They want the impossible-those mean little shits
    I spent a whole year making wagon and sleds
    Assembling dolls their arms legs and heads
    I made a ton of you yo yo's no request for them
    they want computers and robots they think I'm fucking IBM

    Flying thought the air dodging the trees
    Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
    I'm quiting this job theres no enjoyment
    I'll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment

    Theres no christmas this year now you know the reason

    I found a blond who gives good blowjobs
    I'm going south for the season


     
  2. Principessa

    Gold Member

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    LOL, too funny! Thanks for sharing!
     
  3. Vestigial

    Gold Member

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    Damned straight, if I was Santa my elves would be making boxcutter-firing semi-automatics.
     
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