This set poems was originally submitted to fiction forum but it is most assuredly not fiction. There are some absurd last lines for some of the limmericks as as usual in that poem genre, but the essential "sex with a huge dick" fractualisms are not to be denied. How do I know all these stories are true. Because in each of our chat e 1. Sal was dick jerking--daily when twas not even--quite seven And with full fledged copulation--on his birthday--of eleven. All girls did love--his hairless dong Which was already--9 inches long And without seed--there followed no little Sue--or little Kevin 2. In Rio sex clubs--Sal’s performance’s--become a legend His ginormous penis--places first in every competition. In cevix bumping--preceding seismic clamping Or d.t. thrusting--without gagging His cocks unrivaled--AND his tongue--is always second *deep throat 3. The need for Sal to cum--at quarter hour is odd--does confess he ‘n Shots beyond Pete North’s--result of course--from ultra active testes To his super--man physique Add chrisma--with brainy mystique With porn comic prick--he’s worthy of four forums--at LPSG 4. Frau Muller was Nobel--Prize’s 09 Lit--selection Blending poetry’s brevity--and prose’s power--in sheer perfection To this pairing--Sal adds one better Word picture sex--this future Nobel man of letters So reading pleasure--is strongly upgraded--with Nobel class erections. 5. To screw--so many gals--should be an encumbrance To fill a cock--of 11 inch length--and 8 inch circumference Yes blood drain--makes him light headed But so many nymphs--need to be bedded So risking faints--he fucks to please--with 24/7 tumescence. 6. On Cerne Abbas Giant’spenis--barren lasses--oft are lying To become fertile--on 30 foot prick--mentally trying Better to hire Sal--for a fuck If there’s still--no good luck Gals get five--epic orgasms--for the trying *180 foot chalk reclining figure from British ancient times lain upon by couples and women hoping to get pregnant (with 30 foot erect penis translating to 10.5 for real size man) 7. When workout’s finished--Sal hits showers--and always full All guys wanna admire--and question reality--of his thick tool Rich wrinkled Kielbasa--if it’s soft Or thumping his sternum--when flung aloft Claims “God given”--(true, but twas first given--to a bull). 8. To Niagara Falls--Sal took his girlfriend--her sheath to vet But aft one bedding--a super cold--she was to get Too bad they struck off--their must do list A soggy ride--on Maid of the Mist But he in their room--for three days kept--her dripping wet. 9. I love Sal--with all my heart--and all my life Not events or distance--can cleave this friendship--like a knife Beware the curse of--Appaloosa* soul mates Who allow jealousy--through the toll gates In form of wiles--and divisive maneuvers--of a wife *Gun slingers in the movie played by Ed Harris and Viggo Mortenson have a chaste straight back mountain love affair that is destroyed by a jealous wife grabbing Ed away from Viggo. 10. Full of spirits--Sal calls me Donkey--Dong the Lesser And the “Greater”--we both know--is a no guesser For him--my favorite sobriquet Is a well deserved--MTTK* But we both know--for wise cracking wit,--I am the bester *meat to the knees 11. Sal’s favorite lay--from Thailand made--request from he A flood cum--rare from female honey pot--by his salami He briskly stroked--her clit and g-spot Sh’burst her dam--enough t’fill a p.m. teapot And Ocean Center--that very moment--detected a mild tsunamai 12. 11 inches we do share--with penises laid--side by side “No problem” brag chicks--to take most of that--deep inside But Sal’s great thickness--can be alarming So it comes with--a stern dental warning For best results--throughout procedure-- ”Open wide!” 13. Like Hugh Jackman--both men and gals--are drawn to Sal’s bait With black hole attraction--he’ll pull you in--and seal your fate. Teammate and foe--him cannot resist In contact sports--where he’s specialist Each one is beguiled--to wish aloud--that neither of them was straight. xchanges over 5 years I found him to be the best erotic writer ever I met when it was based upon actual experiences but when he strayed into fiction there were glaring inconsistencies and clumminess of narrative construction missing in the true ones. He is a lousy liar about his fanciful sexual adventures and a most engaging and dick stiffening one about his actual ones. So enjoy the snippets of some of my favorite adventures who was the sexiest dude I ever got to know on LPSG.