House Chores

OhWiseOne

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I was reading an article that discussed chores and how it relates to the amount of sex a couple has. It concluded that when a man is responsible for chores outside their core chores, traditional male chores, the monthly occurance of sexual intercourse dropped.

My question is do see this as accurate and do find a man that is willing to help with traditional female chores a turn on?
 

julesq

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This is not the case in our house. Both my husband and I work full time and are out of the house 10 hrs. a day and sometimes even longer. We occassionally have to work weekends and travel. We are both busy! We share the work load in our house; for us there are no traditional jobs. I can tell you if he didn't help out, that is when he would be getting less sex.
As far as it being a turn on for me to see him do "traditional women's job" it really does nothing for me. On the other hand, when I do "men's jobs" it works wonders for him ;)
 

EllieP

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There is nothing sexier than a man in the kitchen! I don't care if he's prepping, cooking or cleaning! I looooove kitchen "dancing."

BTW, I also love doing housework myself. My husband thinks I'm having an affair with the washer and dryer. I wouldn't trust him with laundry, but if he helps make the bed it doesn't make him less of a man in my eyes. He hates to vacuum and I love it. He likes to empty the dishwasher and that's just not my thing.

But I can mow the grass and change my own oil!
 

MickeyLee

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my boy will/has never finished a sink full of dishes without being molested.

he's all sudsy and helpless.. he's mine *pounce*

did the article say if dudes were purposefully tanking the task?
like, say Man-Friend didn't want to do laundry so he "accidentally" bleached a load of colors?

ruining my favorite jeans would piss me off something fierce.
but.. i am a fan of angry sex.
and since i would be sans pants.. he's still probably gonna get laid
:wink:
 
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LaFemme

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I was reading an article that discussed chores and how it relates to the amount of sex a couple has. It concluded that when a man is responsible for chores outside their core chores, traditional male chores, the monthly occurance of sexual intercourse dropped.

My question is do see this as accurate and do find a man that is willing to help with traditional female chores a turn on?

That was the morning drive topic today! Are you my morning man??

Right now I'd attack ANY man willing to do anything inside or outside of the house. I am all migrainey, overwhelmed at the office, it's 40 below and snowing. I just shovelled the walks, the laundry needs doing, the dishes need to be done and I'm not sure where the carpet went. There's a capable "man" in the shower, but according to the threads here, he's probably pissing in there and I know for a fact he ain't cleaning up after himself. Plus he's off to spend the evening with his girlfriend, so that mean wet towels and dirty clothes strewn about. Don't worry though, he'll get to it.

Yup. If I had my own man? He'd be gettin' all sexed up if he helped me tonight! :biggrin1:

There is nothing sexier than a man in the kitchen! I don't care if he's prepping, cooking or cleaning! I looooove kitchen "dancing."

BTW, I also love doing housework myself. My husband thinks I'm having an affair with the washer and dryer. I wouldn't trust him with laundry, but if he helps make the bed it doesn't make him less of a man in my eyes. He hates to vacuum and I love it. He likes to empty the dishwasher and that's just not my thing.

But I can mow the grass and change my own oil!

Then again...

Will you marry me, Ellie? Just for the housework. I'll be good to you and keep you stocked in purses and shoes. The Captain can come, too!
 

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My question is do see this as accurate and do find a man that is willing to help with traditional female chores a turn on?

i think you accidentally a word

do men enjoy being portrayed as dumb-as-fuck hapless morons? just do the damn chores and stop making it about sex
 
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Mercurygirl

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I think that article is serious bunk. May I ask in what magazine or on what site did you read that article?

Personally I think when a partner helps out it leaves more time for other things. An individual would find themselves tired less and in a better mood to engage in sex.
 

D_Fiona_Farvel

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Perhaps I'm an odd duck, but I do not understand how my mate doing something he should be doing anyway translates to a turn on. Taking the trash out, cooking, cleaning the toilet - how about a "just do it motherfucker" followed up with a thanks??

I think some women might use sex as a reward in these instances and that's problematic for me when there should be a natural inclination to take on half the work.
 

EllieP

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Then again...

Will you marry me, Ellie? Just for the housework. I'll be good to you and keep you stocked in purses and shoes. The Captain can come, too!

Oh LaFemme, Cap asked me one day how I could manage without a wife! He says I should get one because they're great. They make life so much easier.
 

MickeyLee

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dishwashing fueled nookie =/= reward.

ya have to see the boy doing dishes.

to avoid belly splash he takes off his shirt.
he jeans kinda slip down on his hips as he's shifting around from sink to drying rack.
so the top of his very bubble butt is exposed.
he's tall.. so he's gotta kinda bend a bit, and the scrubbing stance kinda does awesome flexiness to his back *growl*
and he sings Winchester-esque classic rock while washing dishes

how could i NOT molest at will..
he's all sudsy and helpless :naughty:
*air gropes imaginary butt*

and... a man in a hello kitty apron and rubber gloves just does something for me :cool:


eta: urm, how is throwing in a little flirty tease during ya house work a bad thing?

when he fixes the lawnmower.... i cheer on his mechanical mastery with the appropriate giggles and fawning. he knows we're having a cheeky/smoochy flirt. it's just the fun and tease and ease of being with ya love monkey.

i wouldn't withhold affection or hold resentments over something as trivial as who took out the garbage. keep some mental list of cleaned out the fridge last. is just being an adult and not living like a bear with furniture. and i don't EXPECT him do a anything. i appreciate when he takes time out of his packed day to check a few boxes on my to-do list.. and he's got the same 'babe, you picked up whatever from the whatever for me' followed by the smishhug and fondle of epicness.

*rolls it over... trying to condense* is something simple as showing ya consideration of ya smexychop. not a check/balance for reward favor. *shrug* maybe... close enough :tongue1:
 
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OhWiseOne

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That was the morning drive topic today! Are you my morning man??

Right now I'd attack ANY man willing to do anything inside or outside of the house. I am all migrainey, overwhelmed at the office, it's 40 below and snowing. I just shovelled the walks, the laundry needs doing, the dishes need to be done and I'm not sure where the carpet went. There's a capable "man" in the shower, but according to the threads here, he's probably pissing in there and I know for a fact he ain't cleaning up after himself. Plus he's off to spend the evening with his girlfriend, so that mean wet towels and dirty clothes strewn about. Don't worry though, he'll get to it.

Yup. If I had my own man? He'd be gettin' all sexed up if he helped me tonight! :biggrin1:



Then again...

Will you marry me, Ellie? Just for the housework. I'll be good to you and keep you stocked in purses and shoes. The Captain can come, too!
Dang LeFemme you need some help no matter what their gender is. :frown1:

i think you accidentally a word

do men enjoy being portrayed as dumb-as-fuck hapless morons? just do the damn chores and stop making it about sex
Patch it was a test to see if "_ _ _" would figure it out. :redface:


I think that article is serious bunk. May I ask in what magazine or on what site did you read that article?

Personally I think when a partner helps out it leaves more time for other things. An individual would find themselves tired less and in a better mood to engage in sex.
It was on MSNBC I'll see if I can find it. I also agree with your point of view on the subject.

Perhaps I'm an odd duck, but I do not understand how my mate doing something he should be doing anyway translates to a turn on. Taking the trash out, cooking, cleaning the toilet - how about a "just do it motherfucker" followed up with a thanks??

I think some women might use sex as a reward in these instances and that's problematic for me when there should be a natural inclination to take on half the work.
It wasn't that the man didn't help with the chores but it was a by product of the chores he was doing. Well based on the study and their data.

Trade sex for...anything? There are no prostitutes in my home. There is no punishment/reward system either, because there are also no children. We just do what we have to do. Like grownups.
Refer to about comment. It wasn't talking about a punishment / reward system.

dishwashing fueled nookie =/= reward.

ya have to see the boy doing dishes.

to avoid belly splash he takes off his shirt.
he jeans kinda slip down on his hips as he's shifting around from sink to drying rack.
so the top of his very bubble butt is exposed.
he's tall.. so he's gotta kinda bend a bit, and the scrubbing stance kinda does awesome flexiness to his back *growl*
and he sings Winchester-esque classic rock while washing dishes

how could i NOT molest at will..
he's all sudsy and helpless :naughty:
*air gropes imaginary butt*

and... a man in a hello kitty apron and rubber gloves just does something for me :cool:


eta: urm, how is throwing in a little flirty tease during ya house work a bad thing?

when he fixes the lawnmower.... i cheer on his mechanical mastery with the appropriate giggles and fawning. he knows we're having a cheeky/smoochy flirt. it's just the fun and tease and ease of being with ya love monkey.

i wouldn't withhold affection or hold resentments over something as trivial as who took out the garbage. keep some mental list of cleaned out the fridge last. is just being an adult and not living like a bear with furniture. and i don't EXPECT him do a anything. i appreciate when he takes time out of his packed day to check a few boxes on my to-do list.. and he's got the same 'babe, you picked up whatever from the whatever for me' followed by the smishhug and fondle of epicness.

*rolls it over... trying to condense* is something simple as showing ya consideration of ya smexychop. not a check/balance for reward favor. *shrug* maybe... close enough :tongue1:
Mickey you're just damn funny and to the point. :smile:

I will try to find the article and post it. I think I may have given the wrong spin on it. Because it appears some think the men are bitching in the piece and they weren't. It was trying to make a correlation between the types of chores and the occurrence of sex.

Thanks for your opinions and thoughts.
 

AlteredEgo

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Mickey, my comment was not specifically about your household, only a manifestation of the feelings the original question evoked for me and only me. I have seen punishment/reward systems in relationships. It is my experiences which shape my responses, and if I don't quote anyone, I'm likely just responding to the OP, or the general tone of the thread. In this case, it was the OP.

My relationship isn't like yours. My husband never fucks me. Ever. Okay, okay, sometimes. But sex is just not a part of the marriage I care about anymore other than for procreation. How can I care when he just isn't interested? I'm not any more or less aroused when he does chores.

When I used to be interested in sex with him, any advances were met with rejection unless everything was absolutely ideal. He couldn't be in the middle of doing something, no matter how trivial. We had to already be freshly bathed or have time to bathe. And he had to be horny, which he never is. He wouldn't allow me to flirt with him, or fondle him. Even if everything is as he would want it, I'm usually barking up the wrong tree approaching him for sexual contact. There is no spontaneity to our sexual encounters. They are scheduled in advance.

He loves non-sexual affection, but only if he isn't busy, and I don't have something I'm supposed to be doing instead of snuggling. He gives out kisses like they're made of gold and as hard to come by as paisley planets.

When we do have sex it is unbelievably good. It is always followed by hollow promises to be more open to my advances, and to request sex more often, and not by scheduling it with me, which just isn't appealing. He asks me to initiate more often, but I refuse. Why should I ever initiate again? Every once in a while, he is in the right place at he right time. My hormones go on the warpath and he gets molested, and doesn't resist. But usually, if I want sex, I go out and fuck someone else. You know. Someone who won't say no, who never says no. Someone who begs me to come and play if I've been busy and haven't been by in a while. Someone who makes me feel desired. Not my husband. I like having sex with my husband; I don't like trying and failing to have sex with him.

So, as one might extrapolate, responsibilities are completely divorced from physical contact in my home. There is less than zero mental connection for me between the two. Without anyone else's perspective to consider, the idea of linking the two seems preposterous, but again, only in my bubble. I translated the question the only way I could, and answered it the only way I could. My answer remains:

No. I'm not turned on by a man's willingness to do tasks which would traditionally be seen as mine, nor am I willing to lay him extra just because he knocks my work out if he can and I fall behind. I can only assume the same is true for him. He isn't more interested when I maintain the car, wash the walkway in front of our apartment, remove the trash, walk the dog, or go down to the base tailor with his uniform when I know he's forgotten an impending inspection.

While there are chores that end up being his because I just don't want the responsibility (like I won't take out trash after sunset because I'm afraid I will encounter roaches at the chute) we don't really have assigned tasks. We're just two people in love with a lot of stuff to do. We get the stuff done based on what we say we will do. What are you going to do today, Honey?" "Oh, Sweetheart, do you have time to do...?" It works for us. There is no extra nookie, neither incidentally as a reusult of adorableness during one's labors, nor as an expression of gratitude. Conversely, there is no nookie withheld because of failure to complete a mission. I would see any deliberate compensation system as one of punishment and reward, and I disapprove of such an arrangement. I hope my answer, which is no longer succinct, is clearer now. If not, I have to apologize, but I don't know how else to express my thoughts on the original question.
 

MickeyLee

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*hugs Ms. Altered*

roaches are terrifying :smile:
not as bad as palmetto bugs... those evil sons of bitches FLY!!
 
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I was reading an article that discussed chores and how it relates to the amount of sex a couple has. It concluded that when a man is responsible for chores outside their core chores, traditional male chores, the monthly occurance of sexual intercourse dropped.

My question is do see this as accurate and do find a man that is willing to help with traditional female chores a turn on?

wait...who are you??