how a woman choose bf.

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by african, May 9, 2006.

  1. african

    african New Member

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    well my question to all woman how do choose your bf . do you choose him as package or looking for certain things like cock size .

    thanks and please openly .

    african
     
  2. bluekarma

    bluekarma Well-Known Member

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    For me: there has to be a physical attraction first....then he has to be able to make me laugh.......then smokin' hot sex. The rest will hopefully fall into place.
     
  3. Gisella

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    Chemistry, smart brain, humour...but is funny that in the beggining some of them kind of irritates me a lot i think i'm testing his strenght to not give to much to me...they do have personality and know what they want & where they are going.
     
  4. Honey_Grrrl83

    Honey_Grrrl83 New Member

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    I chose my fiance because of his personality,intelligence,sense of humor,sense of style,and the fact that we both share the same lifestyle,I fell in love with his mind before I ever did his face and body:tongue: He's so incredibly hot and sexy to me I would love him if he had a two inch penis:bj: :notworthy:
     
  5. stud_hunter

    stud_hunter New Member

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    Well, how I choose a guy has entirely to do with what I'm choosing him for. Believe me, there are different kinds of boyfriends! If I want to get into a serious relationship that might end in a lifelong commitment, then really I'm looking at a lot of things before penis size. Cock size would still matter, but only because I'd want my guy to be at least me in a normal range. An average penis I can work with, a small one might be a problem.
    If I'm looking for a boyfriend to be a good time and some enjoyable companionship, but not necessarily anything deep or longterm, then penis size, and sexual performance in general, is more of a factor. It takes effort and creativity to make up for a lack of size, which is fine if the relationship will be longterm. But if we're talking about something lighter and more fling-like, I'd rather just skip the work and get to the massive multiple orgasms...:biggrin1: :biggrin1:
    Was that last part out loud :wink: ?
     
  6. MorganaDrake

    MorganaDrake New Member

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    Choosing a boyfriend...I'd have to say I go more for personality. I don't typically date guys until I know them pretty well. And looking back on my exes only a couple were what you might call hot. That's not to say I don't have physical prefences. I tend to go for slender or toned guys, but i've dated a few that had a few extra pounds. I favor blue eyes, but I've actually only dated a few guys that had them. Most, from my memory, were brown eyed. I go for a guy that respects me, communicates with me, and that I feel I can trust. Penis size has never, ever been a factor to me. I figure as long as they don't have a micro penis, then it's all good. If they don't know how to use it, then they can be taught. If they aren't willing to learn, then that might be a problem.

    I'm a romantic at heart though. I have this idea of love in my head. To me love doesn't know things like physical appearance (besides they have to be clean), money, race, religion or even gender. Love doesn't discriminate. At least that's what I believe. Hmm, not much to add really...

    But this thread for some reason reminds me of Rob, one of my exes. The first time I saw him I think my heart skipped a beat. Not because he was good looking, truth was he was only average. Yet, the sparks seemed to fly anyways. I guess the chemistry was just there between us.
     
  7. lisa_2662

    lisa_2662 Member

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    I start with a guy that I can laugh with and get along with as a friend, and if he's good at sex thats all I care about. I certainly prefer men with larger cocks, but it snot something I require for a good relationship. I'm actually starting to think my current bf is just too big for me, because we can't do it in some positions I was able to do with others because it hurts too much. Even then, I'm not going to dump him, because we have a great time and I see him as a challenge.
     
  8. african

    african New Member

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    thanks all for comment , the result looks until now as package with some interesting items . right .

    let us see more comment

    african
     
  9. D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

    D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah Account Disabled

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    I choose by how comfortable i am with a guy. Someone i can sit with and talk about anything no matter how stupid or deep and personal it is and being able to do the horrible mundane things like burping, farting around and not feel embarressed or feelng the need to go run and hide to do them.

    Looks has a bit to do with it but not a great deal, but a sense of humor is a must, but he needs to know when to be serious. Also someone dependable.

    You'd think that was too much to ask for considering in basically single :disappointed:
     
  10. Mumzi

    Mumzi New Member

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    I didn't really choose my hubby. It just kind of happened. I met him at work and I know I found him very attractive. In fact, I couldn't stop thinking about him. It was very strong attraction almost immediately.
    He was there to see a patient and it was time for visitors to leave and I told him he had to leave. He didn't and when I got back I was a little frustrated.

    It was an odd feeling, I was very attracted to him, but I wasn't sure what signals he was sending. He came back to the desk to apologize and ask me out for coffee.

    It was the whole package. We were un-officially engaged by the time we first had sex, or tried to.
    He does have a good sense of humor, which didn't come out at first.
    He asked me to marry him 5 weeks after we met, and we were married about 3 months after we met.

    This Saturday is our 20th anniversary. I still think he's hot!
     
  11. D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

    D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah Account Disabled

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    Thats an amazing story. Its hard to believe such a quick courtship could be such a success, i mean its not very often you hear of it working out for people who jump into a relationship so quickly, but congratulations and Happy Anniversary
     
  12. gg42

    gg42 New Member

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    I thought they looked at W-2 forms:tongue:
     
  13. Gisella

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    Wow! Very nice indeed Mumzy & congratulations for both of you!

    So romantic!!! :smlove2:
     
  14. ben11

    ben11 Member

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    These are some good posts. Being realtively new here I was afraid most of the women were size queens. When I was in college and a young adult in the late 70's. I ran into a number of them. I'm sure part of it had to do with the age, some with the era and also the tight jeans. It was hard to be discreet about what you were packing which is why I tended more towards the Neil Young look with loose jeans and baggier jeans.

    As I got older, the women in my life were clearly not looking for size first. I guess some of it had to do with their maturity and also due to me being more confident about myself and what I was looking for.

    I am sure women have it worse as to what the guy is looking for. I dated a girl in college for two years and she had an incredible body with 38DDs. She told me that I was the first guy who did not try to take her shirt off on the first date and that was going back to junior high school.

    For the record, it was the fourth date.
     
  15. gg42

    gg42 New Member

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    Since there is no way to tell erect size from "the package", you would think they would disregard the bulge. They all say they do, but in practice they don't!
     
  16. ben11

    ben11 Member

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    Same with women and bras. They've come a long way from kleenex.
     
  17. Mumzi

    Mumzi New Member

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    We did get married soon. I can imagine how we would react if one of our girls said she was engaged after 5 weeks. :eek: Not good! But for us, it just worked. He is almost 5 years older than I, so I was 23 and he was almost 28, not old, but not too young.

    I remember when I was pregnant I got the feeling my husband wanted a boy; but really I think a heathy child is more on the mind. When we had the ultra sound he seemed overjoyed that it was a girl. Then with the second pregnancy, he did say it might be better if it was a girl because there were so close in age. Sure enough!

    He is a push over as a dad. I think I was the one who did all the disciplining when they were little. Then came the teen years and once when our oldest came out in a short skirt and a tight white tank top, my husband all but passed out.
    He took one look and said " oh no, that is way too short".....and "you don't have a bra on!" She said "Daddy"! " yes I do" He says " no you don't, I see nipples" She did, I could see the straps, but what he didn't know was that she was wearing a thong.

    Then he told her to get in her room and put on something more modest. And....he wanted that skit. Wow, I was amazed! We differ I guess, I would have talked to her and hoped she would realize she looked - kinda slutty, for a 16 year old. Just too young.
    Then if she didn't come around, I would just tell her no.

    So, mean daddy is born. She came out of her room in baggy sweats (over kill here) and handed her dad the skirt. So mean daddy pulled out his wallet and handed her a $100 bill and told her to replace it with something else. Then pulls out another $100 and added "and whatever else you want".
    So! That was telling her! Wish my daddy was that mean, lol.
    Then he came into the kitchen with the skirt and actually cut it up and tossed it away.

    He is tough on the boyfriends. He expects to meet them and expects that they shake his hand. He also knows he is going to be intimidating. It's unlikely they would ever bring home someone as tall and he knows it.
    I've watched him. He'll stand up, set his belt buckle (he usually wears jeans with those big western buckles) and then sets his eyebrows down a little. I swear he waits exactly 5 seconds after the guy offers his hand - to shake his hand.
    One day I asked him: did you do that on purpose? He got that silly grin- I think he did.

    He's always been a very involved, very warm dad, and I think that is why the girls do have such self esteem. So many young girls go from guy to guy looking for that love that they never had from their father. Never having that male love, and they make poor choices.

    I think we'd like them to get college under their belt, and then do what they want to do.
    At least we both had done that and we'd both been in the work place.
    I stopped working when I had my first, we didn't believe in baby sitters unless absolutely necessary.
    Then when the girls were 10-11 I went back to get my BS and become a cert nurse midwife. That allowed me to work as little as I liked, but keep myself in the profession.
    I didn't work full time, in fact I only had one patient I'd follow for some time.
    Eventully as they got older I took on more, but I still don't have more than 3.

    Not just because of the kids, but also because he and I do spend a lot of time together.
    I think we were lucky, we have a lot of divorced friends tho. Many on the second and third marriage.
    Maybe it is just a matter of finding the right person and always making them a priority.
    Even when it is the right person, you still have to feed the relationship.
    One problem can be children. It does cause your relationship to change, but you have to be aware of that and keep the husband and wife relationship fresh.

    It seems a lot of problems arise when the kids become adults and mom and dad only know how to play the role of mom and dad. They forgot what it was like to be just two people.
    I just saw the advertisement for the movie RV. About 2 years ago we bought a huge class A rv. Now, it is very nice, but you have to really get along to be in such close quarters. But it is fun, and it can be very romantic. Especially when it's raining and you hear the rain on the roof.
    The other night my husband said to me " wanna sleep in the RV.......I'll put the water sprinkler on the roof"! I think that had something to do with my 'rain on the roof, wow, this is romantic' reaction. :biggrin1:
     
  18. Love-it

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    I just wanted to commend you and your husband on doing a great job of raising your girls. Your children are lucky to have caring, concerned parents, who are willing to be involved in their life. The best thing to do is establish limits and back them up. Children will test the boundaries until they are found or in the worst case they don't find boundaries, they keep exploring, hoping that someone, anyone, will alert them to dangers. Many fall out of the nest before they learn to fly.
    You also showed them, by being a happy, loving couple, that it is possible to have a mature relationship based on love and family.
    Many kudos are in order.
    My wife would have had a much happier life if her father had been involved in her rearing. She does not use it as an excuse but it is a constant emptiness that affects her to this day, she is 58.
     
  19. Mumzi

    Mumzi New Member

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    I can somewhat relate to that. I came from a very well to do family who was very distant. I often wondered if my mom and dad were an arranged marriage as I saw no affection in them or from them. From the time I was a child they had separate bedrooms. During the day he was in his study, she in her den.

    They would not pay for nursing school because they felt being a nurse was lower than being a maid. My mom felt it was disgusting to have to touch other people, to have to be amongst their body fluids. So, my aunt put me through nursing school.

    When my parents heard I was going back to become a midwife, they were even more disgusted. Now I was going to be spending my time with my hand up some woman's vagina.
    Never do they see the beauty of a child coming into this world, or the awe of their parents. They are sad, bitter people, and all their money does not comfort them.

    I was surprised my mom accepted my husband, he is after all a servant to the people.
    Yes, she feels doctors are no better, they have to touch the patients, surgeons have to be amongst body fluids. (the woman is a nut :( )
    However, my husband was a psychiatrist and he didn't touch people, he was above that!

    You know, it's probably good that he is a shrink, because by that time I needed one!
    I think he's had to deal with my issues, and he's been a surrogate father in some ways.
    He manages to be all things to me and that probably makes up for the lack of a father figure.

    We are reflections of so many things in our lives, but if we can manage to reflect more on the positive things then that's half the battle.

     
  20. stud_hunter

    stud_hunter New Member

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    I would have had a happier marriage if my husband had been more involved in it! :wink: . I think this is connected to what you said. Towards the end of my marriage the only thing we did together was have sex. And of course the sex stopped being as good because there wasn't as much energy there. My thought when I read your post was it's a shame how much men are taught it's their main job to be the breadwinner. It seems like lots of men value working and making money over the quality of their relationships. This is not a criticism of men, because I think they're socialized into those roles from a young age.
     
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