How abnormal is it for a str8 guy to be curious?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Torque8, Apr 9, 2009.

  1. Torque8

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    Am essentially str8, never having been fucked much less sucked another guy off, and much prefer females. Being a gym rat and having joined this site about a month ago, I find myself fantasizing about what it would be like to have sex with another guy. I do get turned on by other ripped, muscle guys, but not to the point where I want to kiss them or play with their cocks. Hugging, and hot sweaty pit and pec play (muscle worship) are essentially the extent of my fantasies with another guy. If I were younger (am 32), I'd probably dismiss this as simply a stage of growing up. As much as I'd like to experience the switch, it gnaws at me and goes against my macho (outward) image. Couple of questions for other essentially str8 guys (<20% gay): When (at what age) did your curiousity get the best of you? What's the best way of dealing with your curiousity and repressing your desires/fantasies?
     
  2. lpsg17

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    I too am a gym guy suppressing what i knew to be an inner desire. Glancing at others in lockerrooms and looking away. Messing around with teamates in non sexual ways and secretly thinking about them and how hot they were. Always maintaining my masc exterior but always wondering what it would be like to step over the line. What do i think? with the right guy it could be damn hot, white hot.
     
  3. B_dxjnorto

    B_dxjnorto New Member

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    Torque a lot of guys drop that bluster as they grow older. But you probably won't find anyone at your gym who is ready to drop it at the same time as you are. That whole scene is about self-image, as opposed to changing one's self-image--the man as stoic, without much of an interior life &#8211; all prose, no inwardness.
     
  4. fournineteenfiftynine

    fournineteenfiftynine Well-Known Member

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    I think as we learn more about brain development we are understanding that sexuality is exponentially more complex than dividing sexuality into two (straight/gay) or three categories (straight/bi/gay).

    There are probably millions of variations, but at the very least most people are probably something inbetween. Maybe you find men physically attractive but have little desire to be affectionate with a male. Maybe you find the penis attractive but not the idea of kissing a guy. Maybe you like the idea of women finding you attractive and are turned off by men finding you attractive. Maybe you are emotionally attracted to males but only physically attracted to women. There are so many variations. It is up to you to answer all these questions for yourself, as we all do. There are no easy answers, but maybe that it is the beauty of it.
     
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  5. CUBE

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    curious...that's fine. you can be straight and curious...it is your life. you're fine
     
  6. B_WER25

    B_WER25 New Member

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    Not at all.
     
  7. Capitolhillguy

    Capitolhillguy Active Member

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    I've been an erotic sex worker for 25 years. Most curious guys I work with ( and there have been TONS) wait till they are over 30 to start experimenting with guys. I think it is because if you are also into women, it is so socially acceptable that many postpone the m2m action till it doesn't bother them so much. Often this is past middle age surprisingly.
     
  8. D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

    D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah Account Disabled

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    Dont repress anything cause there is no harm in being curious and trying something new. Thats just human nature. And if you are wanting to try but are worried about what friends will think, then go somewhere they wont know what your doing
    :wink:
     
  9. Principessa

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    On this site, not at all. Then again I am uncomfortable with the word abnormal. Seems wrong to me and I can't think of a better word because it's late and my brain is fried. :redface: To get back to your question in the title I think curiosity about ones own sexuality is acceptable in todays society. If this is something you want to experiment with, my only caveat is be safe and use condoms.:cool:
     
  10. D_Jared Padalicki

    D_Jared Padalicki Account Disabled

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    Straight guys can be curious, but that curious, I won't even call myself that curious (that I want to play with their cocks or pits...) and in my profile I'm 80% straight! Maybe I should change it lol
     
  11. Fredro

    Fredro New Member

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    Not to be judgmental but everyone should be using condoms - whether it be gay OR straight, non monogamous sex.
     
  12. Fredro

    Fredro New Member

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    Torque - Since you are curious, one small thing you may allow yourself to try - check out some of the Gay dating sites, Bear411.com has some of the more masculine acting guys. I suggest those gays who aren't flamboyant queens. Would'nt want to send you screaming back to "straightsville" without getting your questions answered. See how attracted to them you seem to feel. If you feel the guys turn you on, find a nice looking guy (Craigslist, Bear411.com, etc.) and see about setting up a date with someone you might be attracted to. Give yourself permission to try some necking or kissing. Be up front with the guy and tell him you are only curious and nothing might ever develop so he may keep his expectations low.

    That's how I came to the realization I was gay. I was totally put off ("put off" - LOL - yeah right, I thought I was gonna puke!) when I kissed a girl her the tongue went into my mouth. This ought to tell you volumes if you go to first base with a guy.

    It's said that people generally aren't 100% gay or 100% straight. I may not be 100% gay but having sex with a woman makes me wanna wretch. Don't beat yourself up about it. Just look at it as expanding your options.
     
    #12 Fredro, Apr 10, 2009
    Last edited: Apr 10, 2009
  13. swedish fish88

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    I kind of know what you mean. I sometimes wonder if I feel attraction to guys or is this a misunderstood reaction due to me not having a lot of strong male friendships in my life.
     
  14. houtx48

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    the question is how abnormal is for a gay guy to think about pussy?
     
  15. Phil Ayesho

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    being a gym rat entails a certain narcissism, a certain fascination with your own masculine physique that can not help but be sensual and thus erotic.

    This appreciation for masculine features and figures easily translates into homoeroticism and homosexual activity.

    Even then... it is not necessarily gay, simply because it may reflect a phycial fascination, only, without any interest in any form of emotional bond with another man.

    You can appreciate the sensuality and power of the male body without wanting to fall in love with a man.

    That would make you bisexual to some degree... which, scientifically speaking, appears to be the actual norm for the male population.
     
  16. hoggindaz

    hoggindaz New Member

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    well by your own admission you seem to be bisexual, not straight. Just because you have only had relations with women doesnt mean you are straight, there are probably quite a few gay people who only had relations with the opposite sex and still know they are gay.
     
  17. B_thickjohnny

    B_thickjohnny New Member

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    As a teen I had a girlfriend from 8th grade through senior year in HS. In my junior year my best friend and I went on a retreat of sorts for juniors going into their senior year. We went off by ourselves one day and before you knew it we were sucking at each others faces. That went on through junior year and broke off during our senior year which devastated me (another story). In any case, we never thought of ourselves as gay, just very close! I went on with university and never had another man on man experience. I had a long term girlfriend for about 6 years but broke up after she fucked up on too many occasions. I was alone and hung out a lot with a gay friend from work and went to parties with him and met a guy and became friends. One thing led to another and we began sleeping together. That did it for me. I really liked it!! I felt comfortable with it. I still think of pussy from time to time - I especially liked eating pussy. (My BF gagged when I told him that!) I think that if I met a woman today however, and we got to bed, the only thing I could do is fuck her doggy style. I don't think I would "appreciate" her body as much as I appreciate a mans.

    I personally think God made us all bisexual. Let's face it, we could not have male friends if we were not attracted to them at some level. We have to be attracted to them in order to bond in friendship. You know the feelings when you meet someone and feel like you HAVE to be friends with them or when you meet someone and have a strange, uneasy feeling about the person and can't get away fast enough.
     
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  18. Principessa

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    True, but he didn't ask about straight sex.

    Very, as a matter of fact while the OP's question didn't phase me, that bothers me quite a bit.
     
  19. mamba50

    mamba50 New Member

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    Hi there, I am very happily married and I always thought that I was straight until I had experienced a BJ from another guy. It was the very best blow job I have ever had and it made me even more curious. The first time I did it, I felt extremely guilty and said that I would never do that again, but I couldn't stop, once you get the bug, the only thing to do is give it a try and if it does,t work, leave it alone. I most definitely prefer women and that will never change, but a little bit of cock occasionally is good too. Good luck.
     
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  20. AG08

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    Wow, you are bang on my friend. I have wrestled with this all of my life, and I decided many years ago to stop trying to label my feelings. I'm now 42, never had an experience with a man and don't think I ever could, but I still do wonder and fantasize about it all of the time. I'm happily married and wouldn't screw that up for anything, so it will just remain a curiosity for me. When I was single, I had the chance to experiment with guys, but I chickened out - even with a couple of guy friends that I was physically attracted to. I guess I was worried about screwing up friendships or that it would get around that I had these feelings. I was a fairly popular jock in university and I was in a fraternity, so that could have caused huge problems for me. I still wonder if I did the right thing. Maybe if I had tried it when I had the chance, I would have put this to rest once and for all in my mind. In my day though, there was a real stigma to being gay or even being called gay. Things have changed a lot now, but attitudes weren't as liberal 20 years ago as they are now.
     
    #20 AG08, Apr 12, 2009
    Last edited: Apr 12, 2009
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