How can I be comfortable enough with experimenting for the first time?

[talon.harvey]

Hi you guys. This might be a long read but I'll try to make it short! If you reach the end, any advice would be appreciated, thank you!

I'm 22 years old and am bisexual. However, I'm not "out" yet. Thanks to several members of this board, I've come to accept my attraction to men. I've also come to realize that I don't need to label myself (I believe bisexual is the closest thing you could call me though?) or "come out" because my sexuality is my sexuality and it's fluid, meaning that I don't need to advertise it if I choose not to or feel pressure to date a gender and stick with it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

After a string of failed dating attempts, talking stages, relationships, etc. with women, I feel as if I'm ready to experiment with guys. This thought has been in the back of my head for a while now and since I'm single, I think I'm ready to take that first step. I've never done anything with a guy before, I've never even talked to one as more than a friend. No one in my life knows of my attraction to men. Honestly, I still can't see myself being physically intimate with another guy. People on this site have told me that may be a result of me having never done it before, internalized homophobia, etc. etc. I digress, I feel like I'm willing to finally try talking to one in a way that's more than friends.

I made an anonymous account on Grindr with no pictures uploaded. I found two guys on there that I think are attractive (Even if we're just friends that definitely with me). They both have pictures uploaded, although their faces aren't in them. I'm guessing they don't want to be identified or something, I'm not really sure how Grindr works.

They're willing to talk with me more on Snapchat but I know that I'll have to send pictures with my face included or at least my body. I mean they have to have SOME idea of who they're talking to right? But that's where I begin to freak out. Because texting leads to phone calls, which could lead to video calls, which finally leads to meeting in person.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I’m nervous about the fact that: If I do this, there’ll be people out there, in the real world and in my area, that without a doubt know that I’m into guys. I’m worried about us knowing mutual people and them telling others. I’m just paranoid about the entire thing because I don’t want to come out but at the same time, I’m ready to experiment.

Like I said earlier, they're not showing their faces in the pictures either. Maybe they're not out either and don't want to be seen by people they know? Maybe they have something to lose too? Or maybe that's just something normal to do on Grindr? I don't know but it's starting to stress me out.

I suppose I could just make a fake Snapchat account and go from there, but that still doesn't really solve the problem of me having to eventually show them (at least some of) what I look like. I’m stuck and I’d please like some advice from someone who’s out, in my shoes or has been? Thank you, I’d really appreciate it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

TL;DR: I wanna experiment with guys for the first time, but I’m not out of the closet and don’t wanna be exposed etc. How should I go about doing things? Thank you.

 

[throbbingbi]

There's a whole lot going on in that post, and I'm glad to exchange more thoughts in a conversation or even talk over mic sometime. Coming out and experimenting with guys are two aspects of the process, but they don't have to happen together. Could you go out to a gay bar or use Grindr in another city? Or, do you have any gay friends to talk with?

 

[shawn_grey]

I'm looking for some friendship or maybe more as well. I'm bi too HAHA. I also gave up on online dating as well.. Hit me up if you think I'm interesting.

 

[Infernal]

Sometimes you just have to put your nerves aside and do it. I was very nervous when I was first coming out and discovering more about myself. At some point, I said FUCK IT and started to do what I wanted without caring who knew. My life, my choice, and what others thought about it was their problem, not mine. Once you stop caring about what other people may think about you, life get a whole lot easier.

 

[bravesoldier]

Hi you guys. This might be a long read but I'll try to make it short! If you reach the end, any advice would be appreciated, thank you!

I'm 22 years old and am bisexual. However, I'm not "out" yet. Thanks to several members of this board, I've come to accept my attraction to men. I've also come to realize that I don't need to label myself (I believe bisexual is the closest thing you could call me though?) or "come out" because my sexuality is my sexuality and it's fluid, meaning that I don't need to advertise it if I choose not to or feel pressure to date a gender and stick with it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

After a string of failed dating attempts, talking stages, relationships, etc. with women, I feel as if I'm ready to experiment with guys. This thought has been in the back of my head for a while now and since I'm single, I think I'm ready to take that first step. I've never done anything with a guy before, I've never even talked to one as more than a friend. No one in my life knows of my attraction to men. Honestly, I still can't see myself being physically intimate with another guy. People on this site have told me that may be a result of me having never done it before, internalized homophobia, etc. etc. I digress, I feel like I'm willing to finally try talking to one in a way that's more than friends.

I made an anonymous account on Grindr with no pictures uploaded. I found two guys on there that I think are attractive (Even if we're just friends that definitely with me). They both have pictures uploaded, although their faces aren't in them. I'm guessing they don't want to be identified or something, I'm not really sure how Grindr works.

They're willing to talk with me more on Snapchat but I know that I'll have to send pictures with my face included or at least my body. I mean they have to have SOME idea of who they're talking to right? But that's where I begin to freak out. Because texting leads to phone calls, which could lead to video calls, which finally leads to meeting in person.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I’m nervous about the fact that: If I do this, there’ll be people out there, in the real world and in my area, that without a doubt know that I’m into guys. I’m worried about us knowing mutual people and them telling others. I’m just paranoid about the entire thing because I don’t want to come out but at the same time, I’m ready to experiment.

Like I said earlier, they're not showing their faces in the pictures either. Maybe they're not out either and don't want to be seen by people they know? Maybe they have something to lose too? Or maybe that's just something normal to do on Grindr? I don't know but it's starting to stress me out.

I suppose I could just make a fake Snapchat account and go from there, but that still doesn't really solve the problem of me having to eventually show them (at least some of) what I look like. I’m stuck and I’d please like some advice from someone who’s out, in my shoes or has been? Thank you, I’d really appreciate it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

TL;DR: I wanna experiment with guys for the first time, but I’m not out of the closet and don’t wanna be exposed etc. How should I go about doing things? Thank you.

Get you a good buzz, that will loosen you up a lot.

 

[EquusAZ]

I'm going to respond to sections I think are important to address:

"Because texting leads to phone calls, which could lead to video calls, which finally leads to meeting in person."

Woah there! Lol. Easy now. Just because you text doesn't automatically lead to all these activities. The worst case on texting is they have your number, and if you don't want them to contact you, you can block the number. Remember - take it one step at a time. You don't have to jump to intercorse just because you've texted someone!


"I’m nervous about the fact that: If I do this, there’ll be people out there, in the real world and in my area, that without a doubt know that I’m into guys."

This is a concern is you live in an area with a lot of homophobia, however, the same is true if they show you your face. There has to be some give / take here. You could always ask them for their pics first, especially if they ask first. Or you could put it in your profile "if you contact me, have a face pic first." Take controll of the situation, I think that is a key point. Remember they are putting themselves out there too.

"I’m stuck and I’d please like some advice from someone who’s out, in my shoes or has been? Thank you, I’d really appreciate it."

Yeah the internet can be a scary place. I am probably quite a bit older than you but the internet is still where I got started (though it was in its infancy). I too was scared about what to do, how to meet someone, so I kept every conversation at just that stage. Talking. Start slow, and take your time. No need to rush. My advice to overcome the fear of who they are is to talk first, simply text and find out who they are as a person. You'll be able to suss out the creepy ones easily (they give off a bad vibe). Then once you are more comfortable, simply ask them for a face pic, but do be prepared to share one in kind. Take it slow. Keep talking. If someone DOES strike your fancy, meet them in a public place, or somewhere safe.

You will have to put yourself out there eventually but you can do it! Hang in there and take your time though - no need to rush!

 

[abapl]

IMHO- I understand your desire to experiment, but I agree with the PP- take your time, and you are in control of the situation. It's important to think of this as marathon, not a race. Personally, I think you should be comfortable and get to know someone first- get to know someone as a human being first rather than mainly an experimental sex object. The experience is SIGNIFICANTLY better when there is a solid emotional connection and trust- and if you're just experimenting, it's definitely safer to start off with someone you have developed that emotional bond with.

Doing this will be helpful towards better understanding your sexuality, likes & dislikes, etc.

 

[bi2]

Hi you guys. This might be a long read but I'll try to make it short! If you reach the end, any advice would be appreciated, thank you!

I'm 22 years old and am bisexual. However, I'm not "out" yet. Thanks to several members of this board, I've come to accept my attraction to men. I've also come to realize that I don't need to label myself (I believe bisexual is the closest thing you could call me though?) or "come out" because my sexuality is my sexuality and it's fluid, meaning that I don't need to advertise it if I choose not to or feel pressure to date a gender and stick with it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

After a string of failed dating attempts, talking stages, relationships, etc. with women, I feel as if I'm ready to experiment with guys. This thought has been in the back of my head for a while now and since I'm single, I think I'm ready to take that first step. I've never done anything with a guy before, I've never even talked to one as more than a friend. No one in my life knows of my attraction to men. Honestly, I still can't see myself being physically intimate with another guy. People on this site have told me that may be a result of me having never done it before, internalized homophobia, etc. etc. I digress, I feel like I'm willing to finally try talking to one in a way that's more than friends.

I made an anonymous account on Grindr with no pictures uploaded. I found two guys on there that I think are attractive (Even if we're just friends that definitely with me). They both have pictures uploaded, although their faces aren't in them. I'm guessing they don't want to be identified or something, I'm not really sure how Grindr works.

They're willing to talk with me more on Snapchat but I know that I'll have to send pictures with my face included or at least my body. I mean they have to have SOME idea of who they're talking to right? But that's where I begin to freak out. Because texting leads to phone calls, which could lead to video calls, which finally leads to meeting in person.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I’m nervous about the fact that: If I do this, there’ll be people out there, in the real world and in my area, that without a doubt know that I’m into guys. I’m worried about us knowing mutual people and them telling others. I’m just paranoid about the entire thing because I don’t want to come out but at the same time, I’m ready to experiment.

Like I said earlier, they're not showing their faces in the pictures either. Maybe they're not out either and don't want to be seen by people they know? Maybe they have something to lose too? Or maybe that's just something normal to do on Grindr? I don't know but it's starting to stress me out.

I suppose I could just make a fake Snapchat account and go from there, but that still doesn't really solve the problem of me having to eventually show them (at least some of) what I look like. I’m stuck and I’d please like some advice from someone who’s out, in my shoes or has been? Thank you, I’d really appreciate it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

TL;DR: I wanna experiment with guys for the first time, but I’m not out of the closet and don’t wanna be exposed etc. How should I go about doing things? Thank you.

Why dont you get a full body massage from a guy and see how you feel about that?

That way its "just a massage" and at the same time you get to feel and experience a guy touching your naked body.

 

[Dandelion13]

Hi you guys. This might be a long read but I'll try to make it short! If you reach the end, any advice would be appreciated, thank you!

I'm 22 years old and am bisexual. However, I'm not "out" yet. Thanks to several members of this board, I've come to accept my attraction to men. I've also come to realize that I don't need to label myself (I believe bisexual is the closest thing you could call me though?) or "come out" because my sexuality is my sexuality and it's fluid, meaning that I don't need to advertise it if I choose not to or feel pressure to date a gender and stick with it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

After a string of failed dating attempts, talking stages, relationships, etc. with women, I feel as if I'm ready to experiment with guys. This thought has been in the back of my head for a while now and since I'm single, I think I'm ready to take that first step. I've never done anything with a guy before, I've never even talked to one as more than a friend. No one in my life knows of my attraction to men. Honestly, I still can't see myself being physically intimate with another guy. People on this site have told me that may be a result of me having never done it before, internalized homophobia, etc. etc. I digress, I feel like I'm willing to finally try talking to one in a way that's more than friends.

I made an anonymous account on Grindr with no pictures uploaded. I found two guys on there that I think are attractive (Even if we're just friends that definitely with me). They both have pictures uploaded, although their faces aren't in them. I'm guessing they don't want to be identified or something, I'm not really sure how Grindr works.

They're willing to talk with me more on Snapchat but I know that I'll have to send pictures with my face included or at least my body. I mean they have to have SOME idea of who they're talking to right? But that's where I begin to freak out. Because texting leads to phone calls, which could lead to video calls, which finally leads to meeting in person.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I’m nervous about the fact that: If I do this, there’ll be people out there, in the real world and in my area, that without a doubt know that I’m into guys. I’m worried about us knowing mutual people and them telling others. I’m just paranoid about the entire thing because I don’t want to come out but at the same time, I’m ready to experiment.

Like I said earlier, they're not showing their faces in the pictures either. Maybe they're not out either and don't want to be seen by people they know? Maybe they have something to lose too? Or maybe that's just something normal to do on Grindr? I don't know but it's starting to stress me out.

I suppose I could just make a fake Snapchat account and go from there, but that still doesn't really solve the problem of me having to eventually show them (at least some of) what I look like. I’m stuck and I’d please like some advice from someone who’s out, in my shoes or has been? Thank you, I’d really appreciate it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

TL;DR: I wanna experiment with guys for the first time, but I’m not out of the closet and don’t wanna be exposed etc. How should I go about doing things? Thank you.

You should try first with a foreign guy or someone you won't be seeing anymore, I can help you out lol

 

[Brodie888]

1. Set up secondary social accounts
2. Use a different name
3. Use cropped photos that would pass from other social media and don't do dick pics that can be identified as you. Use a body pic for your profile and only give face pics when you get to know someone well.

In that way, if people say anything to you, you can say that it isn't you and they must have stolen the pics online. You've also had time to interrogate people before they see your face pic.

4. Rather than start with sex apps, perhaps you should go for LGBTQ alliance social groups or charities so you can be around other queer people, make friends etc without needing to show your membership number. It gives you a degree of deniability while doing good in the world.

 

[Brodie888]

The first person you have sex with should be someone you will easily be able to talk to the next day or later. Because you will end up freaking your self out without that.

 

[crazyfrog1]

Hi you guys. This might be a long read but I'll try to make it short! If you reach the end, any advice would be appreciated, thank you!

I'm 22 years old and am bisexual. However, I'm not "out" yet. Thanks to several members of this board, I've come to accept my attraction to men. I've also come to realize that I don't need to label myself (I believe bisexual is the closest thing you could call me though?) or "come out" because my sexuality is my sexuality and it's fluid, meaning that I don't need to advertise it if I choose not to or feel pressure to date a gender and stick with it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

After a string of failed dating attempts, talking stages, relationships, etc. with women, I feel as if I'm ready to experiment with guys. This thought has been in the back of my head for a while now and since I'm single, I think I'm ready to take that first step. I've never done anything with a guy before, I've never even talked to one as more than a friend. No one in my life knows of my attraction to men. Honestly, I still can't see myself being physically intimate with another guy. People on this site have told me that may be a result of me having never done it before, internalized homophobia, etc. etc. I digress, I feel like I'm willing to finally try talking to one in a way that's more than friends.

I made an anonymous account on Grindr with no pictures uploaded. I found two guys on there that I think are attractive (Even if we're just friends that definitely with me). They both have pictures uploaded, although their faces aren't in them. I'm guessing they don't want to be identified or something, I'm not really sure how Grindr works.

They're willing to talk with me more on Snapchat but I know that I'll have to send pictures with my face included or at least my body. I mean they have to have SOME idea of who they're talking to right? But that's where I begin to freak out. Because texting leads to phone calls, which could lead to video calls, which finally leads to meeting in person.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I’m nervous about the fact that: If I do this, there’ll be people out there, in the real world and in my area, that without a doubt know that I’m into guys. I’m worried about us knowing mutual people and them telling others. I’m just paranoid about the entire thing because I don’t want to come out but at the same time, I’m ready to experiment.

Like I said earlier, they're not showing their faces in the pictures either. Maybe they're not out either and don't want to be seen by people they know? Maybe they have something to lose too? Or maybe that's just something normal to do on Grindr? I don't know but it's starting to stress me out.

I suppose I could just make a fake Snapchat account and go from there, but that still doesn't really solve the problem of me having to eventually show them (at least some of) what I look like. I’m stuck and I’d please like some advice from someone who’s out, in my shoes or has been? Thank you, I’d really appreciate it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

TL;DR: I wanna experiment with guys for the first time, but I’m not out of the closet and don’t wanna be exposed etc. How should I go about doing things? Thank you.

Honestly bro, I don't know what to tell you other than that one day you actually just have to do it. There is no magic solutions here.

All I can tell you is that when you finally get past all your inhibitions and do it, its like nirvana.

As for the other people thing. I don't know dude, it is a matter of perspective. Life is short, nothing that happens will ever really matter in the end.

For me and basically everyone I have ever talked to, in 2022 the fear of it being out there was always so much worse than when it was actually out there.

I'm not saying 'come out'. You do that in your own time. But if somehow it happens, it almost certainly won't be as bad as your fears. I've been there bro, most of us have been there.

I feel for you bro, that internal conflict is wild.

But the alternative is that you will get to old age never having had those experiences. And they are great experiences, let me tell you.

My only other advice is don't be afraid of awkward. Embrace the awkward. Just let it be. You probably will be awkward your first time, and that's okay. It goes away with time, don't let it consume you.

Another possible solution for some people has been to travel. If you can make it work, go to a country like New Zealand or Australia, or even the UK. I know the US is still a bit behind the times, but over here is really just isn't a big deal.

Good on you for getting it out there bro, even if it is just on an internet forum. If you need to chat feel free to DM me. I won't have any magic solutions, but sometimes it's good to just get the conflict out of your mind.

Edit: And don't feel you have to label it or put yourself in a box bro. If you want to have an experience, it's an experience. You don't have to "be" a something. You are a person, that is all that matters. Sometimes people spend too much time worrying "what" they are. Life is a ride bro, it's wild, just go with it.

 

[CaptainRugby]

I Never had to “come out”, being masc and “popular” helped, I guess, but still get the surprise when guys (and more often girls) find out. I’ve had similar thoughts about having a bf for the first time, my fam know I’m bi but (except for my siblings) have never really seen me with a guy so it’s kinda not real, I guess.

You’ve clearly got a lot going on. You have to decide how much you want to explore. Do you go to the extent of alt accounts, meeting a guy in another city? That’s not so unusual. Do you want to know and trust the guy first, or just want something physical? You might also find that after you play with a guy you realise it’s not for you.

Good luck, mate. I’m a similar age, drop me a DM.

 

[Jnic5]

I was in a similar position as you and worried about people finding out as ive always dated girls. I would never want my friends/family to know and it's kind of a thrill meeting guys occasionally and having to be discreet about it.
I started off messaging guys on gay dating apps for over a year and never had the courage to meet them. I'd always send dark photos and tell them my situation. some didn't want to continue but some didn't mind and respected that. In the end I had a few beers one evening and thought "fuck it" let's meet someone. I went to a guys house with him knowing I just wanted to have fun together but not sex. After you've met the first guy the rest are much easier. I'll meet random guys occasionally and I also have a masseuse who I can go to for whatever I want.

 

[rsny845]

I have found - thus far without exception - that guys I have met with are understanding, some flattered that they have been sought out to explore with, and eager to offer emotional support. Discretion has always been honored. A few have been mentors in my coming out.

Most - if not all - gay men know first hand the challenges of coming to grips with sexuality, self condemnation, family and society attitudes, and the simple mysteries of sex. There is a kind of brotherhood of the oppressed.

 

[boc]

Remember these lyrics by Van Morrison "It doesn't matter to which god you pray, precious time is wasting away."

 

[boc]

I have found - thus far without exception - that guys I have met with are understanding, some flattered that they have been sought out to explore with, and eager to offer emotional support. Discretion has always been honored. A few have been mentors in my coming out.

Most - if not all - gay men know first hand the challenges of coming to grips with sexuality, self condemnation, family and society attitudes, and the simple mysteries of sex. There is a kind of brotherhood of the oppressed.

I have never understood why other straight men act offended when they find out a gay man finds them attractive. I think they might be a little scared that they secretly like the attention.

 

[cityboy66]

Once you put that dick in your mouth, you'll know. Enjoy your life as it won't last forever.

 

[Kleine1948]

Hi you guys. This might be a long read but I'll try to make it short! If you reach the end, any advice would be appreciated, thank you!

I'm 22 years old and am bisexual. However, I'm not "out" yet. Thanks to several members of this board, I've come to accept my attraction to men. I've also come to realize that I don't need to label myself (I believe bisexual is the closest thing you could call me though?) or "come out" because my sexuality is my sexuality and it's fluid, meaning that I don't need to advertise it if I choose not to or feel pressure to date a gender and stick with it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

After a string of failed dating attempts, talking stages, relationships, etc. with women, I feel as if I'm ready to experiment with guys. This thought has been in the back of my head for a while now and since I'm single, I think I'm ready to take that first step. I've never done anything with a guy before, I've never even talked to one as more than a friend. No one in my life knows of my attraction to men. Honestly, I still can't see myself being physically intimate with another guy. People on this site have told me that may be a result of me having never done it before, internalized homophobia, etc. etc. I digress, I feel like I'm willing to finally try talking to one in a way that's more than friends.

I made an anonymous account on Grindr with no pictures uploaded. I found two guys on there that I think are attractive (Even if we're just friends that definitely with me). They both have pictures uploaded, although their faces aren't in them. I'm guessing they don't want to be identified or something, I'm not really sure how Grindr works.

They're willing to talk with me more on Snapchat but I know that I'll have to send pictures with my face included or at least my body. I mean they have to have SOME idea of who they're talking to right? But that's where I begin to freak out. Because texting leads to phone calls, which could lead to video calls, which finally leads to meeting in person.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I’m nervous about the fact that: If I do this, there’ll be people out there, in the real world and in my area, that without a doubt know that I’m into guys. I’m worried about us knowing mutual people and them telling others. I’m just paranoid about the entire thing because I don’t want to come out but at the same time, I’m ready to experiment.

Like I said earlier, they're not showing their faces in the pictures either. Maybe they're not out either and don't want to be seen by people they know? Maybe they have something to lose too? Or maybe that's just something normal to do on Grindr? I don't know but it's starting to stress me out.

I suppose I could just make a fake Snapchat account and go from there, but that still doesn't really solve the problem of me having to eventually show them (at least some of) what I look like. I’m stuck and I’d please like some advice from someone who’s out, in my shoes or has been? Thank you, I’d really appreciate it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

TL;DR: I wanna experiment with guys for the first time, but I’m not out of the closet and don’t wanna be exposed etc. How should I go about doing things? Thank you.

I share your dilemma with your bold statement," No one in my life....to men. I too am in the closet with my family and just my twin brother knows that I am into guys but my youngest son he has no clue or he keep it to himself if he suspect me being gay, I cannot even wear a kilt in front of him and I am not welcome in his place in my kilt although he knows why I wear a kilt, medical reason but that is still a no no. I have one friend that I lie in bed with but that is all so I don't hang it out for everybody to know. If my in-laws find out then they will slam the door shut in my face, They all extremely ultra conservatives and red necks so I cannot win with them.

 

[Chimmychimms]

Hi you guys. This might be a long read but I'll try to make it short! If you reach the end, any advice would be appreciated, thank you!

I'm 22 years old and am bisexual. However, I'm not "out" yet. Thanks to several members of this board, I've come to accept my attraction to men. I've also come to realize that I don't need to label myself (I believe bisexual is the closest thing you could call me though?) or "come out" because my sexuality is my sexuality and it's fluid, meaning that I don't need to advertise it if I choose not to or feel pressure to date a gender and stick with it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

After a string of failed dating attempts, talking stages, relationships, etc. with women, I feel as if I'm ready to experiment with guys. This thought has been in the back of my head for a while now and since I'm single, I think I'm ready to take that first step. I've never done anything with a guy before, I've never even talked to one as more than a friend. No one in my life knows of my attraction to men. Honestly, I still can't see myself being physically intimate with another guy. People on this site have told me that may be a result of me having never done it before, internalized homophobia, etc. etc. I digress, I feel like I'm willing to finally try talking to one in a way that's more than friends.

I made an anonymous account on Grindr with no pictures uploaded. I found two guys on there that I think are attractive (Even if we're just friends that definitely with me). They both have pictures uploaded, although their faces aren't in them. I'm guessing they don't want to be identified or something, I'm not really sure how Grindr works.

They're willing to talk with me more on Snapchat but I know that I'll have to send pictures with my face included or at least my body. I mean they have to have SOME idea of who they're talking to right? But that's where I begin to freak out. Because texting leads to phone calls, which could lead to video calls, which finally leads to meeting in person.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I’m nervous about the fact that: If I do this, there’ll be people out there, in the real world and in my area, that without a doubt know that I’m into guys. I’m worried about us knowing mutual people and them telling others. I’m just paranoid about the entire thing because I don’t want to come out but at the same time, I’m ready to experiment.

Like I said earlier, they're not showing their faces in the pictures either. Maybe they're not out either and don't want to be seen by people they know? Maybe they have something to lose too? Or maybe that's just something normal to do on Grindr? I don't know but it's starting to stress me out.

I suppose I could just make a fake Snapchat account and go from there, but that still doesn't really solve the problem of me having to eventually show them (at least some of) what I look like. I’m stuck and I’d please like some advice from someone who’s out, in my shoes or has been? Thank you, I’d really appreciate it.

-------------------------------------------------------------

TL;DR: I wanna experiment with guys for the first time, but I’m not out of the closet and don’t wanna be exposed etc. How should I go about doing things? Thank you.

I was in a similar situation and speaking only from my experience, you won’t feel really comfortable until you stop caring what other people think, otherwise you’ll always be looking over your shoulder.

however, that doesn’t mean you still can’t have fun or experiment lol. My advice would be to find guys in similar situations and that way you’ll know they have something to worry about just as you do. Maybe you’ll be able to build some trust naturally from there