How can I make it work

[D_Dick_S_Lapp]

Because sometimes we like to make you guys apologize multiple times.:wink:

To be honest, I took it as a statement as opposed to a question and I jumped the gun on my response. Didn't see what came after that post so for my part of it I'm sorry as well.

You have to understand that in this particular forum women ask other women questions, which is what the OP did and then the males start answering, which is what you did. Just to clear on why all that had to take place in the first place. You're not the first and you won't be the last. :tongue:

ANY TIME NOW ROB! :wink:

I don't fully understand the "and then the males start answering" part but believe me i get it. Its frustrating being a woman on here. I don't even want to say anything else because its kind of pulling from the original helpful thread.

And by ANY TIME NOW ROB! I guess you meant ROB_E which if that's what you mean then this took a rather strange turn. Does this mean i'll be in some sort of trouble with this site? If so that's kinda sad.

Ok now that i know ROB_E is a mod, yeah well i'm kinda feeling singled out. Guess i should get ready for some weirdness huh?

It would appear that ROB_E is more than a mod.

 

[RawDog]

Rather than getting a dildo to practice with, go get a zucchini roughly his size from the market and wrap it with saran wrap and coat it with olive oil (or lube).

This is what my wife did when we were having phone sex, by the way. She really wanted our first time to be problem free.

 

[molotovmuffin]

I don't fully understand the "and then the males start answering" part but believe me i get it. Its frustrating being a woman on here. I don't even want to say anything else because its kind of pulling from the original helpful thread.

And by ANY TIME NOW ROB! I guess you meant ROB_E which if that's what you mean then this took a rather strange turn. Does this mean i'll be in some sort of trouble with this site? If so that's kinda sad.

Ok now that i know ROB_E is a mod, yeah well i'm kinda feeling singled out. Guess i should get ready for some weirdness huh?

It would appear that ROB_E is more than a mod.

Sorry. We (the women's forum) have been promised for quite a long time that there would be a sub forum added. The ask a woman forum.

Now as to your other question/statement. How would you feel if someone asked you personally a question and a buttload of other people answered for you as fact?

Now, back to the OP.

 

[D_Dick_S_Lapp]

Sorry. We (the women's forum) have been promised for quite a long time that there would be a sub forum added. The ask a woman forum.

Now as to your other question/statement. How would you feel if someone asked you personally a question and a buttload of other people answered for you as fact?

Now, back to the OP.

Oh i understand. I understood before all this. That's why i apologized. I would feel frustrated that all of these other people answered as fact. BUT if one were to have already apologized and took responsibility for their actions, i would leave it be.

Twice in one thread post, which is understandable because of the overall frustration but then you went on to imply that you wanted help. From the sites administrator. ROB_E

Seriously, the question stays the same. Why is it necessary in this particular event?

 

[newgirl28]

I started to have the same issues with sensitivity with oral sex (lack thereof) and difficulty having an orgasm after trying for ages (when it used to happen much easier) and they weren't nearly as WOW as they used to be a few years ago. I got my blood pressure checked out and come to find out it was suddenly high when it used to be normal my whole life. I had an accident where it caused my blood pressure to spike and never go back down. Once I got on blood pressure medications it was like I had my old clitoris back and more!

Oh, I have had unexplained high blood pressure for years now. They thought it was the birth control pills. But even when I went off of them it never fully went down. Man, if I could just take a pill and have everything work again that would be wonderful. I'll have to mention it to my obgyn during my appointment in a few weeks.

I might get a zuchini in the mean time, since I can actually afford that at the moment. Heh. It would be nice to get something less disposable though... I'm having a hard time finding anything listed by girth. I got all my other stuff from babeland but they never answered my email (did they think it was a joke or something?).

 

[SprinkleMe69]

OP, you will see the width as 1", 1-1/4" etc. For a 6" girth go for the 2" wide measurement.

There, question answered by a woman. No "why" questions by a man that just doesn't get it.

Where's Hick, I want some of that coffee. :smile:

 

[newgirl28]

OP, you will see the width as 1", 1-1/4" etc. For a 6" girth go for the 2" wide measurement.

There, question answered by a woman. No "why" questions by a man that just doesn't get it.

Where's Hick, I want some of that coffee. :smile:

Oh! I didn't know that's what those numbers meant! Thank you!

 

[SprinkleMe69]

You're welcome. Glad to be of assistance to you. Btw, welcome to the site. :smile:

 

[OhWiseOne]

OP, you will see the width as 1", 1-1/4" etc. For a 6" girth go for the 2" wide measurement.

There, question answered by a woman. No "why" questions by a man that just doesn't get it.

Where's Hick, I want some of that coffee. :smile:

And how do you know this? Starbuck's......:tongue:

 

[B_subgirrl]

Not to sound like a bag o douche (is probably gonna happen anyway) but if SOME women find it can be helpful, doesn't that mean it isn't overrated? Also i asked a women because i didn't know. i never said it was magical but thanks for that.

Seriously, though was all that really necessary?

I say it is overrated for several reasons:

1. Although some women DO love oral, for many women, oral just doesn't rock their world. Some actively hate it. Yet . . .

2. Many men seem to walk around proclaiming that oral is the solution to all problems - the magical one-size-fits-all spell that will either transform her vagina into something that will fit you, will have her writhing around in ecstasy, or both.

And yes, it WAS necessary. If the misconception isn't pointed out, people will continue to believe it, thus dooming many oral haters and toleraters to hours of unwanted oral.

Also, I realise that later in the thread you said you intended your original post about oral as a question. I didn't read it as one. I read it as yet another guy assuming he had the one-size-fits-all answer. The reason I read it that way was largely because you wrote this:

I've had a few strange sexual experiences where i usually do that first as a rule. But after a while they just wanted to go straight at it. Which confused the hell out of me.

That implies that you expect your one-size-fits-all solution to work on everyone and you were confused that it didn't.

Apologies if I misinterpreted you though.

Thanks to molotovmuffin for understanding where I was coming from perfectly!

And apologies to the OP for taking her thread entirely off track :redface:.

 

[tgirlsrgreat]

I hope I don't have vagismus...

We tried twice and he still couldn't get it in. Oral is pointless I never cum that way. He's put some mighty efforts up before and I usually just stop him after awhile because I can tell his neck is cramping up and I'm cold.

Orgasms are usually just tiny little jolts anyways and then they're gone. I used to be able to have great ones when I was in my early teens by myself, but the last ten years or so they just don't work that well anymore.

I thought I almost this weekend with hand stimulation, but I was stuck hovering over the edge for like an hour and it woudln't freakin go over and eventualy I stopped him because the pressure was so much it was hurting and I was exhausted.

I think I made the poor man think he was a freak and inadequate when I know that it's me (I tried to convince him but he woudln't believe me).

Would kegels help? I can't seem to find a 6in girth dildo. They always seem listed by length...

i don't think the point to oral is to have an orgasm (that would be a nice bonus i would think) rather it is to increase moisture/lubrication and increase stimulation to allow insertion more easily. what everybody else said too, relaxing, don't try so hard, practice practice practice.

 

[D_Dick_S_Lapp]

I say it is overrated for several reasons:

1. Although some women DO love oral, for many women, oral just doesn't rock their world. Some actively hate it. Yet . . .

2. Many men seem to walk around proclaiming that oral is the solution to all problems - the magical one-size-fits-all spell that will either transform her vagina into something that will fit you, will have her writhing around in ecstasy, or both.

And yes, it WAS necessary. If the misconception isn't pointed out, people will continue to believe it, thus dooming many oral haters and toleraters to hours of unwanted oral.

Also, I realise that later in the thread you said you intended your original post about oral as a question. I didn't read it as one. I read it as yet another guy assuming he had the one-size-fits-all answer. The reason I read it that way was largely because you wrote this:



That implies that you expect your one-size-fits-all solution to work on everyone and you were confused that it didn't.

Apologies if I misinterpreted you though.

Thanks to molotovmuffin for understanding where I was coming from perfectly!

And apologies to the OP for taking her thread entirely off track :redface:.

Could please and i mean please go back into this thread and read everything again? I'm pretty sure you'll change your opinion after a bit of thought. If not then just me know. I have a few things to say on the matter.

 

[B_Hickboy]

Holy shit, blue balls.

 

[D_Dick_S_Lapp]

Holy shit, blue balls.

Nope not blue balls. Just tired of being generalized. Also Hick. Could you please at least go back into the thread and read a bit before you tell me to fuck off? Thanks

 

[185248]

Oral first, something about ones lips making another at ease, them knowing that you love and respect their most intimate physical places is important. Fingers, insertion a little at a time, licking touch and kiss. no I am not gay, but a human body responds to touch and caress. Also, listen to what you hear. Most important.

 

[D_Kitten_Kaboodle]

Hi newgirl, belated welcome... :wave2:

I've read the thread (uh, all of it) and some of the things I was going to offer really will not help you, as you do not like oral stimulation.

But, I'd like to add that oral is not overrated for some women. Some women can really loosen up a good bit when stimulated by oral (of course... not a magic cure, I recognize that). I cum easily with oral (or any type of clitoral stimulation) and it relaxes me a good bit.

Perhaps if you try working up slowly and stretching bit by bit (the Kegels, Stretching, thread MMR recommend has some good advice.) You said you have used dildos and did not expect a problem. Do you know if the dildos were as big or bigger than your guy?

Another suggestion is a hot bath or hot tub before sex... It is very relaxing and does help SOME women...

Personally, I have worked up from taking a 4" girth to now being able to accomodate 6.5" easily. Part of that is when I am in the throws of hot sex, I self-lube alot and I also use more lubricant (Wet Platinum and Gun Oil are my favorites.) I know this does not work for everyone, but works for me, and I can only speak for myself.


I hope you can find something that works for you, honey. Time, practice, and going slow.... I hope it works for you. I know there are women that will rebuttle these suggestions, but ... well.. works for me. :smile: The main thing is, make it fun, experimental, and as stress-free as possible.
Good luck, girl.

And and aside: fftopic: I never took Mr. Jabali's original comments as stating fact. I think there are two question marks in his comment... so I took it as his opportunity to ask women... does this really work or not. Personally, I didn't feel it was inappropriate at all. He got the answer he was looking for, and I really hate that there was tension in the thread. Everyone has apologized to each other.... but if you read it all at once, it's stuff like this that is distracting and takes away from the forums.

 

[D_Dick_S_Lapp]

Hi newgirl, belated welcome... :wave2:

I've read the thread (uh, all of it) and some of the things I was going to offer really will not help you, as you do not like oral stimulation.

But, I'd like to add that oral is not overrated for some women. Some women can really loosen up a good bit when stimulated by oral (of course... not a magic cure, I recognize that). I cum easily with oral (or any type of clitoral stimulation) and it relaxes me a good bit.

Perhaps if you try working up slowly and stretching bit by bit (the Kegels, Stretching, thread MMR recommend has some good advice.) You said you have used dildos and did not expect a problem. Do you know if the dildos were as big or bigger than your guy?

Another suggestion is a hot bath or hot tub before sex... It is very relaxing and does help SOME women...

Personally, I have worked up from taking a 4" girth to now being able to accomodate 6.5" easily. Part of that is when I am in the throws of hot sex, I self-lube alot and I also use more lubricant (Wet Platinum and Gun Oil are my favorites.) I know this does not work for everyone, but works for me, and I can only speak for myself.


I hope you can find something that works for you, honey. Time, practice, and going slow.... I hope it works for you. I know there are women that will rebuttle these suggestions, but ... well.. works for me. :smile: The main thing is, make it fun, experimental, and as stress-free as possible.
Good luck, girl.

And and aside: fftopic: I never took Mr. Jabali's original comments as stating fact. I think there are two question marks in his comment... so I took it as his opportunity to ask women... does this really work or not. Personally, I didn't feel it was inappropriate at all. He got the answer he was looking for, and I really hate that there was tension in the thread. Everyone has apologized to each other.... but if you read it all at once, it's stuff like this that is distracting and takes away from the forums.

I just want to thank you from the bottom of my heart. Truly, truly appreciated.

 

[B_subgirrl]

Could please and i mean please go back into this thread and read everything again? I'm pretty sure you'll change your opinion after a bit of thought. If not then just me know. I have a few things to say on the matter.

It still reads the same way to me. I realise that you didn't intend for it to come across that way, but to me it did and does.

 

[EthanM]

I hope I don't have vagismus...

We tried twice and he still couldn't get it in. Oral is pointless I never cum that way. He's put some mighty efforts up before and I usually just stop him after awhile because I can tell his neck is cramping up and I'm cold.

Orgasms are usually just tiny little jolts anyways and then they're gone. I used to be able to have great ones when I was in my early teens by myself, but the last ten years or so they just don't work that well anymore.

I thought I almost this weekend with hand stimulation, but I was stuck hovering over the edge for like an hour and it woudln't freakin go over and eventualy I stopped him because the pressure was so much it was hurting and I was exhausted.
...

Tell your Doctor you need to get off your SSRI anti-depressant because it is preventing you from reaching orgasm. There are alternatives, but don't just go off on your own.

 

[OlderGuy]

To the OP: Go to a adult shop with a soft tape measure and check out the dildos and vibes for yourself. Measure the girths with your tape measure and get three with increasing girth - maybe a 4.5", a 5.5", and a 6.5". Buy some good lube.

Go home and start with the small girth; use lots of lube. Pleasure yourself in whatever way works for you to relax - could be with your fingers; could be your boyfriend's mouth and fingers; could be music and a bath; could be a Catwoman costume - whatever works. Work the toy and your fingers until you get comfortable with things of size in your vagina. Massage your clit, g-spot, A-spot, cul-de-sac, whatever you like and can reach.

Take your time and enjoy your body. Learn your sexual response. Kegel. Squirt. Don't. It's all good.

Work up over days or weeks to larger girths. Always use lots of lube.

There is no hurry. Involve your boyfriend and stay relaxed about the whole thing. Eventually start trying his penis - "just the tip" at first. Most of all, don't worry. You'll get there. :smile: