How Did You Find Love? (gay Relationships)

[zaynmlk1626]

update

the relationship with this guy is great but not perfect. we have a few issues that makes both of us sad and insecure about each other. in general it's the perfect relationship, we are the perfect couple, we get along really well with each other, we respect each other, we are never bored together and we have lot's of fun. sexually though things are not so perfect. we are together for about 2 moths now, we have never managed to have a full intercourse.

looks like that his penis is to wide for me, we have tried so many times, used different lubes, coconut oil, some sex toys and creams that would help me loosen up down there, i just can not take him, it hurts like hell. i feel so sad that i can not satisfy him in that way. he is too wide for me, actually he can barely fit to a normal condom he uses XL condoms. i am not an experienced bottom so my hole is quite tight and i have only managed to take half of his penis in me, that only for 2-3 minutes, it hurts so bad that i can not take it longer.

the problem is not only on me, he has a sexual problem too. he can not cum. we are together for about 2 months and i have never seen him ejaculating, no matter how long i suck and play with his dick, he just won't cum. ever. he has confessed to me that when he watches porn, he has no problem ejaculating, he can cum in like 10 to 15 minutes, but on the other hand when he is having sex with an actual person, he finds it really hard to cum. he said it's not because of me, it was the same situation throughout his entire sex life. he said that 90% of the times he had sex with a guy he wouldn't cum. on the other hand i don't have any issues on ejaculating, when i am with him even if we just kiss, or he gives me head or a hand job i can cum very easily. it's kinda frustrating trying to make your bf to cum but he won't.

as a relationship it's what i always wanted, i i can see myself being with this person for many years, we have talked about it, we both want to be together we don't want to end it, he has many feelings for me, he doesn't want to think about his life without me, we like each other a lot and we get along together very well, it's something you can't find very often in your life. i am worried though that eventually our bad sex life will ruin our relationship.

any ideas?

 

[Big_a_20]

update

the relationship with this guy is great but not perfect. we have a few issues that makes both of us sad and insecure about each other. in general it's the perfect relationship, we are the perfect couple, we get along really well with each other, we respect each other, we are never bored together and we have lot's of fun. sexually though things are not so perfect. we are together for about 2 moths now, we have never managed to have a full intercourse.

looks like that his penis is to wide for me, we have tried so many times, used different lubes, coconut oil, some sex toys and creams that would help me loosen up down there, i just can not take him, it hurts like hell. i feel so sad that i can not satisfy him in that way. he is too wide for me, actually he can barely fit to a normal condom he uses XL condoms. i am not an experienced bottom so my hole is quite tight and i have only managed to take half of his penis in me, that only for 2-3 minutes, it hurts so bad that i can not take it longer.

the problem is not only on me, he has a sexual problem too. he can not cum. we are together for about 2 months and i have never seen him ejaculating, no matter how long i suck and play with his dick, he just won't cum. ever. he has confessed to me that when he watches porn, he has no problem ejaculating, he can cum in like 10 to 15 minutes, but on the other hand when he is having sex with an actual person, he finds it really hard to cum. he said it's not because of me, it was the same situation throughout his entire sex life. he said that 90% of the times he had sex with a guy he wouldn't cum. on the other hand i don't have any issues on ejaculating, when i am with him even if we just kiss, or he gives me head or a hand job i can cum very easily. it's kinda frustrating trying to make your bf to cum but he won't.

as a relationship it's what i always wanted, i i can see myself being with this person for many years, we have talked about it, we both want to be together we don't want to end it, he has many feelings for me, he doesn't want to think about his life without me, we like each other a lot and we get along together very well, it's something you can't find very often in your life. i am worried though that eventually our bad sex life will ruin our relationship.

any ideas?

Ok first off in terms of taking his dick you really have to be in the right position and be relaxed. It will take work but you both should go about it in terms of ass play not with the expectation of going into full penatrative sex.
Now in terms of him not ejaculating during sex acts with you; he needs to stop watching porn and jerking off. I know guys are going to go nuts with this but he needs to reprogram his sexual response to be with you and the feelings he experiences during rather than images. 90 days, no porn, no masturbating, no touching his dick unless it’s to pee or wash. It’s the toughest thing to do (I should know because I’ve done it) but it makes a world of difference.
Oh and one last thing: cumming is amazing but don’t put pressure on each other that it needs to happen in order to qualify the experience. You two are being intimate with each other and are still learning each other’s bodies. This is real life and not porn. Have fun and enjoy it.

BTW ... if you wanted to share a pic of his dick we wouldn’t be opposed to seeing it ... so we can REALLY assess the situation

 

[Jarizzi]

I wrote to an inmate on a prison pen pal site. I realize that this is not a normal way to meet your boyfriend. But it unexpectedly worked for me.

 

[stannn1111]

From early years I understood that my orientation is not straight. I started to find my boyfriend on different dating websites. For about 3 years I couldn't find anyone because I had the same troubles that you have, no idea what to talk about, were to go,etc. I started to surf the net to find some solutions. Maybe the problem is me. I got very good advices on a blog http://twinflamez.net. This blog brought me to the calm, I`ve learned how to lead different situations. And now already for 2 years I`m happy with my soulmate. I suggest you to be more insistent and strong, and you will find your twin flame for sure.

 

[elfin9doug]

I met my first partner at a gay bath house in the town where I used to live. We were together over twenty-seven years. He was eleven years older than me, and later developed some serious health problems. About nine years ago, he passed away.

Shortly before my first partner died, a canon from our local cathedral had introduced me to a new guy. We became close friends. He had lost through death an older partner several years before. When I was suddenly single again, the new friend and I both decided that we were meant to be together, and so it has been since. He is about twelve years younger than I am.

My two partners have been very different people: background, personality, interests, sex. I feel grateful, however, I have been able to share my life with both of them.

 

[zaynmlk1626]

@admins

this is a message to the admins, please delete this thread, thank you

 

[Novaboy]

@admins

this is a message to the admins, please delete this thread, thank you

Hope you're ok Zaynmlk.

 

[dreamer20]

update
we are never bored together and we have lot's of fun. sexually though things are not so perfect...
looks like that his penis is too wide for me,...i am not an experienced bottom so my hole is quite tight and i have only managed to take half of his penis in me, that only for 2-3 minutes, it hurts so bad that i can not take it longer...

he has a sexual problem too...we are together for about 2 months and i have never seen him ejaculating, no matter how long i suck and play with his dick, he just won't cum. ever. he has confessed to me that when he watches porn, he has no problem ejaculating, he can cum in like 10 to 15 minutes, but on the other hand when he is having sex with an actual person, he finds it really hard to cum. he said it's not because of me, it was the same situation throughout his entire sex life... on the other hand i don't have any issues on ejaculating, when i am with him even if we just kiss, or he gives me head or a hand job i can cum very easily. it's kinda frustrating trying to make your bf to cum but he won't.
i am worried though that eventually our bad sex life will ruin our relationship...any ideas?

You are not an inexperienced bottom in my opinion zaynmlk1626. You have had experience enough to learn that a "too wide" penis is not suitable for you and I do hope you and Guy1 have accepted this fact. Fortunately Guy1 is able to give you sexual pleasure and has told you he prefers porn to bring himself to a climax. I've had a similar case of a friend who masterbated to porn and only required me to bite his nipples on demand. Let that be your next experiment and challenge. Find out if he wants to be touched by you while he watches the type of porn that arouses him. With willpower he should be able to arouse himself mentally and wean himself off his porn dependence eventually. I do wish you both happiness and farewell.

 

[zaynmlk1626]

update

apparently one of our problems with guy1 solved, he finally can cum without watching any porn, just by me, while jacking him off and kissing him which is really nice.

we have tried so many ways to have actual sex on the other hand, no he won't fit in me. it's frustrating.

 

[tps87]

update

apparently one of our problems with guy1 solved, he finally can cum without watching any porn, just by me, while jacking him off and kissing him which is really nice.

we have tried so many ways to have actual sex on the other hand, no he won't fit in me. it's frustrating.

You may want to check out these two books: "How To Top Like a Stud" and "How To Bottom Like a Porn Star" both written by "Woody Miller". They are on Amazon, etc.

For bottoming position can be important to open up everything. You may already be aware of this but these books may be helpful. Also not all gays are into anal sex and you two don't have to be. You could focus on other activities and just not stress over this. Getting a mind blowing BJ is pretty nice!

Just for anyone else following this thread with some of your original concerns I'll offer my experience. I met my current relationship (going on 1.5 years now) on Adam 4 Adam. I wasn't really looking for a relationship. At the time I had a guy I was seeing regularly for about 6 months but it didn't seem to be progressing. Also met him on a dating site and I liked him a lot. He was the first one to make me think about doing more than just hooking up with guys - something more serious and long term, but he also had some issues he was working thru. He had a past relationship that he didn't seem to be fully over and he also only made limited time to see me even though I was looking to spend more time with him. I was generally ok with it since being in the closet, I didn't want anything real public yet but it also left me feeling a bit at loose ends and with free time to keep hanging out on the dating sites. We never had any agreement to not see other people and he also continued to be on the sites.

When I met my current guy I thought it was just another dating site thing - maybe we meet up a couple times. He popped up new on the site, I saw his picture and thought he was so hot that he was outside my league so I kept checking out his profile but I was too shy to message him. Next thing I knew he was chatting me up and we arranged to meet. Being closeted (I'm still in the process of coming out) he respected (and still respects) my need to be discrete so we met in his car (haha) in the afternoon. We talked and made out a bit. We hit it off right away and decided to meet up at his place again in the evening. He had been burned in a few longer term relationships and on the dating apps in general so he had no high expectations and figured I wouldn't show up - but I did. In short order we decided to be exclusive. We don't live together but we see each other so much it is not far off from it.

He is still recovering from being burned by his past relationships and I'm still on a path to be my true self openly so we have things to work on but overall we have been good for each other and have a strong physical and emotional attraction.

I guess for me there was no formula to it and I wasn't even really looking for something long term. I think it comes down to meeting people and then being open to more if the chemistry is right. Also following thru and not being too shy to chat with someone or go meet them.

 

[dreamer20]

update

apparently one of our problems with guy1 solved, he finally can cum without watching any porn, just by me, while jacking him off and kissing him which is really nice.

we have tried so many ways to have actual sex on the other hand, no he won't fit in me. it's frustrating.

You view having his penis inserted in your anus as "full intercourse" and "actual sex". That is not the case at all. You are indeed having actual sex - just a different variety of sex. I personally would be satisfied by rimming, oral, being fingered and massaged. I'm glad to see that you have made some progress. Keep up the good work zanymlk1626.

 

[fireboy1337]

You will laugh, but I was in this situation. I was single for a long time, but then I decided that I want a relationship. There are not many good guys in my city that I could like. I found the app LGBTQ+ Dating & Social Network. Join For Free! > Taimi and started chatting with different guys. I found the one I was looking for. His name is Alex and he's incredible. When it came to intimacy, we had a problem. It hurt him a lot when I tried to do "it". I realized that I was hurting him, so I couldn't enjoy the process. This situation lasted more than a month and I began to worry about it. We did it. I think you should relax the muscles in your body.

 

[zaynmlk1626]

yep. still single

 

[fournineteenfiftynine]

Meetup group.

 

[deleted13249411]

I met my current boyfriend on Planetromeo three years ago, after a short relationship with another guy. I don't like at all these dating websites and apps but I was looking for a man who shares the same projects and the same values as me. Someone who prefers to have their fingers full of dirt in the garden than clubbing and this kind of stuff.

Totally by chance, I met this guy, same age as me, very discreet about himself. I think I was looking for the same thing. He comes from a conservative family (Muslim background, but not very practicing) and didn't have a clear picture of him. I was a bit suspicious about him, he was pretty cold. But we finally physically met each other.

Our first meeting was friendly, we talked about a lot of different topics. He said he was careful because there were a lot of guys who were only looking for sex or people who had too many criteria unrelated to body and personality, but for example financial and professional situation. Since he was in school dropout situation and unemployed, few people wanted to build a serious and lasting relationship with him.

For a year, our relationship was strictly friendly, I felt he didn't want to take the plunge and I didn't want to rush him. He was in a difficult psychological situation anyway. I think that's what he was looking for, he finally confessed that he had feelings for me, just like me for him.
I think that friendzone is bullshit and I think that a boyfriend is also a best friend who can be trusted with everything. He has the same vision as me and I humbly think it is what allowed our couple to hold for two years.

 

[bravesoldier]

My story was pretty incredible actually. I had and still have a great internet buddy in the state of Michigan I met online years ago. I live in Alabama. Around three years ago the MI buddy connected online with a guy in Alabama and they chatted over a various interests. My friend in MI told him about me in AL. Turned out the two of us AL guys lived directly across the state, about 2.5 hours apart. My MI bud suggested I give it a try and I said it would never happen because of distance and work schedules. The guy across the state and I did meet three years ago and are still together today, very much in love.

Keep looking my friend!