How do gay men define "virginity"?

marc_andrew

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Personally, I believe the term is a bit outdated. The word comes from Latin, meaning “maiden” or “a sexually inexperienced woman”. Virgin is pretty much just a term invented to control female sexuality and is still being used to shame women for being sexually active and having sexual urges. Similarly, it is often used to shame men for not having had sex, suggesting that male virgins are ‘less manly’ and thus inferior. It would be better to just do away with the concept altogether so that people don’t pursue sex or refrain from it because of shame.
 

frenshy52

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Personally, my only sexual encounter was this summer. We just caressed, touched and masturbated. I did not cum but he did. It was very enjoyable but honestly, I still feel virgin, shy and awkward about sex.
But the question is: did I lose my virginity or not? Hard to say.
 

art

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The first time a guy fucked me and came inside me, I lost my anal virginity. On the other hand, I think the first time I fucked a guy's ass and came inside him, my cock lost its virginity. For me, it was the same guy to whom I lost my top and bottom virginity.
 

allin4cum

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I am certainly not any kind of expert but I still do have an opinion.
My opinion is that anytime 2 people (does not matter if 2 M or 2 F or MF) give each other orgasms, then they have had sex and their virginity is gone.
In my case, my gay virginity was lost when I swallowed his cum and he then swallowed my cum. My straight virginity was lost when I came inside my GF, she had already lost her virginity before that.
 
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I basically consider it first sexual contact of any kind so even getting and giving head count!
 
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Acratopotes

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That said, virginity is an arbitrary concept made up by men to put a value and control women. It can be what you want it to be because at the end of the day it doesn’t really matter

I think this hits the nail on the head. For much of history no-one was interested in whether a man was a virgin. Men valued women who were virgins because it meant when she subsequently became pregnant he knew the baby was his.

Even when referring to women, it is seen as less important now that contraception has improved. It is mostly an irrelevant concept for men and is only about bragging and in that respect, having found someone to love is much more important that having fucked the college bike or a prostitute.

So for everyone, gay men included, what is more useful is "have made love to someone yet?" as opposed to using someone else's body to get off.