How do I go about finding an affair partner?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by drifter777, Oct 13, 2011.

  1. drifter777

    drifter777 New Member

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    I am a 60 year-old married man who's wife has had a hysterectomy and now has a very low sex drive. I desperately want to find a women that would like to share my closeness needs, and I'm sure they are out there - they have to be - right?

    I'm not trolling for people on this forum (although wouldn't rule it out) but rather looking for real-life help on this matter. I'm sure many men and women find themselves in this predicament at some point in their life so am somewhat confident I can solve this problem with your help.


    -Thanks
     
  2. D_Dan_T_Zinferno

    D_Dan_T_Zinferno New Member

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    I would recommend trying craigslist: dallas / fort worth classifieds for jobs, apartments, personals, for sale, services, community, and events where there is an extensive personal ads section with many categories. I'm sure you'll be able to find a woman or women in your city, either by answering ads or posting one of your own.
    You may even be able to meet women in your area through this site. Posting a few photos with your profile may increase your odds of attracting attention.
    I wish you luck in finding a satisfactory partner.
     
  3. dolfette

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    posting photos will also increase the risk of his wife finding out and her heart being broken.
     
  4. dolfette

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    also, sexually transmitted diseases are on the rise in the over 60's.
     
  5. Kotchanski

    Staff Member Moderator Gold Member

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    Do the decent thing and wank.
     
  6. nudeyorker

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    My first piece of advice is talking to your wife and letting her know that you are there for her (if you are) in terms of what she has endured (you did not say when the surgery was, last week or last year?) I'm sure she is not too thrilled with life right now either. A good start might be visiting her doctor with her and getting his/her feedback on your wife's disconnect with her sex drive and what venues are available to you both medically and maybe some couples therapy.
    I think you owe it to yourself and your wife to explore some alternatives together before you become another statistic as a cheating husband with a wife wondering what she did wrong and wondering alone what to do about it.
     
  7. D_Dan_T_Zinferno

    D_Dan_T_Zinferno New Member

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    I suppose it was presumptuous on my part to assume that some couples actually discuss these things openly and reach agreements they both can live with.
     
    #7 D_Dan_T_Zinferno, Oct 13, 2011
    Last edited: Oct 13, 2011
  8. drifter777

    drifter777 New Member

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    It's been 4 years and I'm tired of discussing it with her. She doesn't want to do the hormone thing and I won't make her try as it can cause additional complications.

    I don't want to see her doctor as I simply don't care what her (Dr.) feed back is since it's really up to my wife to bring it up if she cares about her lack of sex drive.

    You are probably right here, and it would be difficult for me to be with another woman but I feel I have run out of options and am running out of time. In addition, my wife cheated on me years ago and I never "got even" with her for what she did to me. This may be playing a part in my current motivation, but I really miss the intimacy and passion of sex.
     
    #8 drifter777, Oct 13, 2011
    Last edited: Oct 13, 2011
  9. Kotchanski

    Staff Member Moderator Gold Member

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    Now it makes sense...

    I pity the woman, I really do.
     
  10. nudeyorker

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    Thank you for being honest and filling in the missing pieces because there were a few. I wish you the best with this difficult decision. For your sake and your wife's be discreet and use common sense and try to make the best possible choices rather than the easiest ones.
     
  11. conntom

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    Gets him off but doesn't solve the intimacy part of the problem in the least.

    Sex isn't all about getting off. A large part if having someone close and naked with passion/love between them. (And getting off)...
     
  12. conntom

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    You pity her???

    She cheats, gives herself to some other guy, then he (still with the cheater) ends up with the hysterectomy and dealing with the situation. Where is her affair partner? WHy isn't he here dealing with the hysterectomy and lack of sex? Oh yea, he got his and moved on.

    I for for this guy. Not her. She deserves to be stuck alone.
     
  13. conntom

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    This is a guy I would be friends with....
     
  14. dolfette

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    if your relationship has hit the wanting to 'get even' point then you should just end it. sometimes affairs just happen but coldly planning one is a different thing altogether.
     
  15. sizequeenNY

    sizequeenNY New Member

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    You should try a site like aff(you can have pics without your face), alt.com(if you are kinky), casual encounters on craigslist, or see an escort. I know guys in your situation and some of them are on those sites. I just personally choose not to play with anyone that isn't in an open situation
     
  16. Gecko4lif

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    Move to florida. Looks of horny old people here.
     
  17. Riven650

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    I completely agree with Dolfette. The fact that you feel you haven't 'got even' for your wife's affair is a much bigger problem than her hysterectomy. If you haven't forgiven and forgotten, she's bound to have difficulty feeling like having sex with you. You need to deal with that - preferably through a marriage guidance counsellor. The idea is to help your wife feel wanted again. Her libido (for you) will increase when she feels more secure.
     
  18. jakesph

    jakesph New Member

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    I dont condone this but if you really wanted to go through with it maybe try ashleymadison.com. They are the affair website.
     
  19. flame boy

    flame boy Account Disabled

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    You sound miserable. She sounds miserable. My absolutely non-professional advice - get a divorce and live it up as a single older man. The disdain you feel for this woman comes through in every word you write about her. That's not a good thing.
     
  20. justacynic

    justacynic Member

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    With a reputation for mostly fake profiles to make men think there are women to communicate with, and sending messages is where the site makes money. Based on what other members have posted, I would go with AFF over ashley.
     
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