How do I tell someone I'm not interested...

B_Think_Kink

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So there is this guy who hooks me up with drugs at raves. If anyone hasn't heard or read my signature I'm over joyed when it comes to doing ecstasy. I received a message on my facebook from a guy that I usually see at raves. He showed interest in me at the last one, when I was rushing (or the high was kicking in) I was kissing all the boys around me. I'm not attracted to this person but ecstasy makes you do stupid things.

Anyways I call the number he left on the message and he says he wants to go to coffee on tuesday and he'll call me then. He also said that I don't have to worry about paying him for the tabs at the next rave. He jokingly said.. I want you to come here and fuck me right now. To which I replied.. "um no".

So my delemma.. I don't fuck straight men, I have no interest in him and he clearly wants me to the point he will be giving me tabs. I'm sketched out because I don't want anything to happen. I do know that I wont give in to his advances when I'm high, but how do I let him know without breaking friendships that I'm not interested in him... at all.

How do I tell him that I'm only attracted to gay men and that being bisexual is the minimum I can even imagine doing... How do I communicate that I'm not the "girl" I appear to be.


*note* I'm not looking to be told any information about ecstasy, I'm well informed and decided as an adult to take the tabs. I will ignore any thing that is said about it being bad that I do ecstasy.
 

jason_els

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Do it as sweetly as possible. Make a big deal out of how flattered you are and how sweet he is, but you're just not into him that way. If you feel you can trust him with why, then explain that, giving him a information in bits and pieces until he understands. If you don't feel you can trust him, then just say you don't want to ruin your friendship and you've never thought of him in that way and never will. Then change the subject. From then on, don't avoid him, but don't lead him on either.
 

killerb

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just lay it out to him like you just did to us...be straight up & honest...it's the best way...

but I gotta tell u, he might find it really hard to believe & will think you're just rejecting him...

I only say that because if a girl ever told me that I'd think it was a crazy excuse...simply because it's not a common thing for a woman to ONLY be interested in gay guys...
 

B_Think_Kink

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just lay it out to him like you just did to us...be straight up & honest...it's the best way...

but I gotta tell u, he might find it really hard to believe & will think you're just rejecting him...

I only say that because if a girl ever told me that I'd think it was a crazy excuse...simply because it's not a common thing for a woman to ONLY be interested in gay guys...
It might help my case that he only see's me with gay men. The last 3 raves I was with gay friends. All of whom would back me up on that story.
 

B_New End

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Giving tabs ain't a thing. Take his tabs, and if he thinks he can take something from you, because he gave you a lousy tab, clock him in the nose. I hear a bloody nose on x, is like, heaven.

BTW, raversboys that trade x for sex are dirty, dirty, dirty. Get a test if you lose control.
 

wshaunpennington

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How do I tell him that I'm only attracted to gay men and that being bisexual is the minimum I can even imagine doing... How do I communicate that I'm not the "girl" I appear to be.


That's a tough one. I'm a bi-ish gay man who is only attracted to girls if they are lesbians or butch bisexuals. I've had to explain that to quite a few young straight ladies, and they are usually frustrated, but accepting. It's harder to explain to the dykes that I want to fuck, than to the chicks I don't.

Chin up. It's all gonna work out for the best.
 

Principessa

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Is it really necessary to explain your sexuality to him? He kinda sounds like a jerk and I'm not altogether sure he would get it. Can't you just say, "no, thank you I'm not interested," or maybe, "since you're my dealer I prefer not to mix business with pleasure."
 

D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

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Tell him your really sorry if you gave him the idea you were interested, but the drugs make you extra friendly but you see him only as a friend. He doesn't need to know anything of your sexual preferences and telling him would only be giving a friend more info the he needs
 

ballsaplenty2156

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Let's put all the onus on him! This chick is willing to take his drugs for free, make out with multiple partners, right in front of him, and is questioning what should she do, because he is promising her free tabs at the next rave, but she's not into him sexually.
Where is her responsibility in this? She's hardly some innocent lamb being led to the slaughter.
Quit getting high for crying out loud, and get your life together. You're a mess!! If you have to get stoned to really enjoy sex, than you clearly shouldn't be having sex. Sex is a high in itself. Drugs are just a long, slow road to nowhere. You'll end up doing this dude because you want free tabs. Soul for sale, right over here!!!!
 

B_Think_Kink

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Let's put all the onus on him! This chick is willing to take his drugs for free, make out with multiple partners, right in front of him, and is questioning what should she do, because he is promising her free tabs at the next rave, but she's not into him sexually.
Where is her responsibility in this? She's hardly some innocent lamb being led to the slaughter.
Quit getting high for crying out loud, and get your life together. You're a mess!! If you have to get stoned to really enjoy sex, than you clearly shouldn't be having sex. Sex is a high in itself. Drugs are just a long, slow road to nowhere. You'll end up doing this dude because you want free tabs. Soul for sale, right over here!!!!

Would you shut the fuck up?!
Where the hell does it say that I wanted free tabs! He offered them, I made nothing said about me taking them because I don't know what he's got. Fuck you for suggesting I shouldn't be getting high, because you're boring ass life doesn't have some fun to it that doesn't include sex doesn't mean the rest of us are drug free. I fucking love ecstasy and no little idiot like you is going to convince me that I should stop. I don't even enjoy having sex that much because it's not that fucking easy to find men that I am attracted to to have sex with. I wont end up fucking him because no amount of tabs makes me want to have sex, I don't get the horny urge that you think you know anything about.
So again I invite you to shut your fucking mouth and don't respond where you have no info at all.

That is all.
xx
 

D_Ivana Dickenside

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just be upfront with him about where you stand. let him know how you feel and don't come off like a bitch. it's better to tell him from the start than to beat around the bush.

ohhhh and i didn't know raves were still going on. apparently i must be out of the loop or something cause they're not common in LA.
 

B_New End

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just be upfront with him about where you stand. let him know how you feel and don't come off like a bitch. it's better to tell him from the start than to beat around the bush.

ohhhh and i didn't know raves were still going on. apparently i must be out of the loop or something cause they're not common in LA.

There's three or more "parties" a week in Seattle (100 - 1000 people?), and one or two "massives" (1,000 - 5,000 people) a month. Allthough, I think the days of 3 - 5000 people are over. My first massive was in 1999, and that was 4 - 5,000 people. I am sure there must be raves in LA.. allthough I only hear about the ones in the NW and Utah.
 

invisibleman

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simply because it's not a common thing for a woman to ONLY be interested in gay guys...


Well, if there are gay guys looking for straight guys (I AM NOT ONE OF THEM.), then there is possibility that there are women who want to have sex with gay guys. (I ACTUALLY KNOW THAT AS WELL. THERE ARE WOMEN IN CHURCH THAT ARE FREAKY. )
 

eastbaydude

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It's really easy. Why don't you just say no thanks.

The coffee suggestion sounds like he's into you and wants to take it farther. There's no reason to be rude or anything, just say no thank you. You don't need to prove anything, explain why, give any kind of history.

But, if he's offering you drugs because he thinks there might be a chance of a relationship between the two you, you should once again say, "No thank you."

I have one question for you... You only have sex with gay men? What's up with that? I'm guessing that if you started having sex with str8 men, you'd enjoy it more.