How Do Women Feel About Premature Ejaculation?

albert2006

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How does a woman react when her husband or bf has premature ejaculation?
Sexually I don't last a long time (4-5 minutes on average), and I make up for this with lots of foreplay, licking/fingering before and after and this has never been a problem for me .
The problem,obviously,is for my wife(and the same for my exes) because this situation leaves her highly frustrated and unsatisfied and this situation isn't pleasant for both of course...
I can last a little longer (10 minutes and more)in some positions(misionary and doggy-style )but when she is on top i cum very quickly..(2-3 minutes)
The reasons ,i think, can be both psychological and physical.On a psychological level the feeling of inadeguacy for my penis size (a little below average)cause me a performance anxiety , on a physical level a glans hypersensitvy can be a cause.When she is on top thrusting up and down sometimes my penis slips out and more often comes out almost completely ..In both cases the head of my penis is strongly(and pleasantly)stimulated and as said before i orgasm in a short time.When she moves grinding back and forth is the same(the contact of my glans with fornix anterior is really exciting)
In other positions and with shorter strokes i can last longer but both my wife and my exes didn't ever reached the orgasm in this way but only being on top..
I am circumcised and my prostate is ok..
I have met different women but with each of them i have had the same problem..
What's your opinion?
 
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I'm not big on receiving oral and fingering can be awesome, but it is not a substitute for how I orgasm from penetration with cock or a toy. Do you last longer if you've had one orgasm and is your refractory short? I could work with that without much complaint. Same short amount of staying power after already having one orgasm and long refractory period? That's going to be quite far from my ideal, but if I care about the person, I could still work with that.
 

AlteredEgo

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Yeah, as long as it doesn't interfere with my pleasure, or isn't constant, it's not a problem for me. I had a playmate who would erupt the second his glans was in contact with my vulva. This is through a condom too, mind you. He'd immediately go down on me, but he never would try again to penetrate. Only during our first encounter did he make a second attempt. He came instantly again, and went down on me again. After a second or third encounter that went the same way, he didn't see inclined to even try to fuck me. We just gave each other head. It was fun. I would never have tried to life him up though. He was just one playmate of several, and that made it acceptable to me. That, and I did always have an orgasm.

There have been others who popped too soon. It's not a big deal to me. I just expect such a friend to keep doing something to maintain my excitement or guide me to orgasm, and to get hard again and make another, more successful attempt.
 

albert2006

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I'm not big on receiving oral and fingering can be awesome, but it is not a substitute for how I orgasm from penetration with cock or a toy. Do you last longer if you've had one orgasm and is your refractory short? I could work with that without much complaint. Same short amount of staying power after already having one orgasm and long refractory period? That's going to be quite far from my ideal, but if I care about the person, I could still work with that.
Yes,i can last longer after the first orgasm of course..The refractory isn't too short unfortunately ..( I need at least 2 or 3 hours.)..When i was younger i was able to have sex and ejaculate 3 times in a day or 2 times in one night..
 

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Yes,i can last longer after the first orgasm of course..The refractory isn't too short unfortunately ..( I need at least 2 or 3 hours.)..When i was younger i was able to have sex and ejaculate 3 times in a day or 2 times in one night..
Why not masturbate earlier in the day?
 
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Yes,i can last longer after the first orgasm of course..The refractory isn't too short unfortunately ..( I need at least 2 or 3 hours.)..When i was younger i was able to have sex and ejaculate 3 times in a day or 2 times in one night..

When my partner and I were long distance, it was a standing mostly unspoken request that before we did get to see each other, that he would jerk off earlier in the day. He would last a better amount of time when we did get to it that way.
 

albert2006

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Yes,it's true..Masturbating earlier is a good idea(and when i did it the sex was better) but often the women aren't' in the mood...
 
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Being very honest...

It's frustrating!!!!!! My wasband chronically had PE. We're talking under 1 minute consistently. One time, I was frustrated and actually timed it... 37 seconds. THIRTY SEVEN SECONDS. I would imagine that this was pretty normal for him. I don't need a TON of time to "get there" but I definitely need more than 37 seconds. I would start to get close, he'd feel me start to get tight, and BLAM... He was done... just before I was. I felt "ripped off", like my orgasms were "stolen". If he had circled back around and made sure I was satisfied orally or something, I might have felt differently... but he didn't. Asshole. It got to the point that I didn't want to have sex with him. Told him this was why I wasn't interested in sex, and requested that he make sure I was happy. He said he understood. He didn't follow through on his words (a recurring problem in our relationship). When I did have sex, I would mentally hold back because I knew I wouldn't get there. No fun. Eventually, I got to the point that I had no interest. Not a happy place.

On the flip side, I have had two gentlemen friends who have the opposite problem and wouldn't reach orgasm at least half the time we were together. Almost as frustrating. One struggled with depression and hid that he was on medication that would affect his ability to get there. I took it personally that he wasn't attracted before I knew about his meds. My current guy says he struggles with lack of sensation at times. I'm not sure what to do with him, but it's also affecting my desire to get frisky. I want my partner to have as much fun as I have. When he doesn't get repeatedly there... it affects my desire to want to be with him. I don't want to say anything that may add additional pressure, but I also don't want him to think I'm not attracted to him and that's why my desire is waning.

TBH, I'm not sure which is worse. I feel selfish when I get there and my partner doesn't. I get spiteful when my partner does and I don't. Toss up.
 

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Yes,it's true..Masturbating earlier is a good idea(and when i did it the sex was better) but often the women aren't' in the mood...
So? Do you know how many times I have shaved my labia, and Dude wasn't available that evening? So, I was gonna have to remove that hair at some point anyway. Now there will be less to do to maintain it the next day when he is available. Same concept. Masturbate earlier in the day, be ready already, just in case. Easy enough to repeat the next day. Jeebus. You're acting like giving yourself an orgasm once a day or every few days is a huge chore. Honestly, it sounds way more fun than anything she likely has to do to feel ready. Also, don't you think that improved stamina might induce the mood more often?
 
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albert2006

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Being very honest...

It's frustrating!!!!!! My wasband chronically had PE. We're talking under 1 minute consistently. One time, I was frustrated and actually timed it... 37 seconds. THIRTY SEVEN SECONDS. I would imagine that this was pretty normal for him. I don't need a TON of time to "get there" but I definitely need more than 37 seconds. I would start to get close, he'd feel me start to get tight, and BLAM... He was done... just before I was. I felt "ripped off", like my orgasms were "stolen". If he had circled back around and made sure I was satisfied orally or something, I might have felt differently... but he didn't. Asshole. It got to the point that I didn't want to have sex with him. Told him this was why I wasn't interested in sex, and requested that he make sure I was happy. He said he understood. He didn't follow through on his words (a recurring problem in our relationship). When I did have sex, I would mentally hold back because I knew I wouldn't get there. No fun. Eventually, I got to the point that I had no interest. Not a happy place.

On the flip side, I have had two gentlemen friends who have the opposite problem and wouldn't reach orgasm at least half the time we were together. Almost as frustrating. One struggled with depression and hid that he was on medication that would affect his ability to get there. I took it personally that he wasn't attracted before I knew about his meds. My current guy says he struggles with lack of sensation at times. I'm not sure what to do with him, but it's also affecting my desire to get frisky. I want my partner to have as much fun as I have. When he doesn't get repeatedly there... it affects my desire to want to be with him. I don't want to say anything that may add additional pressure, but I also don't want him to think I'm not attracted to him and that's why my desire is waning.

TBH, I'm not sure which is worse. I feel selfish when I get there and my partner doesn't. I get spiteful when my partner does and I don't. Toss up.
An incredibile Story...You really have no luck.I'm sorry for you..I don't really undestand your husband's behavior...
 
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An incredibile Story...You really have no luck.I'm sorry for you..I don't really undestand your husband's behavior...
meh... I've had others that were great.

my intent was trying to share that the opposite can be an issue, too... and that if my wasband had just circled around, i think that would have been preferable to me.
 

albert2006

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meh... I've had others that were great.

my intent was trying to share that the opposite can be an issue, too... and that if my wasband had just circled around, i think that would have been preferable to me.
Surely also the opposite can be a issue..The depression and medication use surely can be a cause.After a serious personal grief(i have lost my parents in 9 days)i use medication too.The sex is quite different.I can last a little longer but it's difficult to have a strong erection as before for example..
 

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It can be frustrating...I was with a guy who had this problem. There were a few times when he came right on penetration. That was only mildly frustrating because he would perform oral on me and take care of me in other ways. But the frustrating part was he wouldn't be ready for sex again for a couple of hours or more. And even then he would still only last 5 minutes at most.

I also had another guy who would take foreverrr to cum, and sometimes he couldn't get there at all. That is frustrating too because the whole event feels unfinished, and also it doesn't make me feel very attractive if a guy has trouble finishing with me. :confused:

The best partner I've ever had was able to go as long as I needed, and then when I asked him if he was ready, I could feel his body tense up and he would go really hard for about 60 seconds, and he'd finish. That is asking a lot of a guy to control his orgasm like that though. I'm generally satisfied if a guy can last 10 minutes.