How do you define bisexual and why do you use that label?

bigboaster

Mythical Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Mar 5, 2018
Posts
17,259
Media
4
Likes
75,329
Points
358
Location
Barbados
Verification
View
Sexuality
Pansexual
Gender
Male
It seems to be a spectrum of types" of bisexuals that post in this section but sometimes it does get confusing to see so many replies from guys who "don't like anything on a man except the cock". I find it odd to hear self-identified bisexuals describe their attractions this way. This strikes me more as some type of cock fetish or paraphilia as opposed to sexual attraction to men?

How are some of you actually defining the word, and based on that why opt for that label instead of straight or heteroflexible perhaps? I'm curious. I have heard of "straight" guys who would essentially describe similar feelings but wouldn't identify as bisexual.
 

Uncle_Bob69

Legendary Member
Gold
Platinum Gold
Joined
Jul 2, 2022
Posts
380
Media
10
Likes
1,167
Points
438
Location
San Jose, California, United States of America
Sexuality
50% Straight, 50% Gay
Gender
Male
Depends on age. If you grew up before all the pronouns & prefixed hyphenated labels, Bi meant two , both . Bi meant having sex with both male and female sexes.
Since you described it as a spectrum using current terminology to describe gender & another made up label heteroflexible, sound like you enjoy the modern, hip terminology
 

Triplexintx

Legendary Member
Joined
Oct 31, 2006
Posts
461
Media
7
Likes
1,788
Points
648
Location
Texas (United States)
Sexuality
80% Straight, 20% Gay
Gender
Male
Depends on age. If you grew up before all the pronouns & prefixed hyphenated labels, Bi meant two , both . Bi meant having sex with both male and female sexes.
Since you described it as a spectrum using current terminology to describe gender & another made up label heteroflexible, sound like you enjoy the modern, hip terminology
The problem with labels is that they seldom fit 100%. I guess I would define myself as Bi, but in my situation, I have no romantic interest in men, just sexual. I grew up in the 80s & 90s when being called gay was the worst thing someone could call you. Have the times changed enough that young men today have no reaction to being recognized as Bi?
 

bigboaster

Mythical Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Mar 5, 2018
Posts
17,259
Media
4
Likes
75,329
Points
358
Location
Barbados
Verification
View
Sexuality
Pansexual
Gender
Male
Depends on age. If you grew up before all the pronouns & prefixed hyphenated labels, Bi meant two , both . Bi meant having sex with both male and female sexes.
Since you described it as a spectrum using current terminology to describe gender & another made up label heteroflexible, sound like you enjoy the modern, hip terminology
Bi still means two depending on who you ask. Not sure that's "changed" really. A lot of new terminology are just synonyms for already existing identities. Hetero flexible is just bi... under a new name but it might be more suitable for guys who lean towards women with little romantic interest in men. Maybe they think that's more "accurate" than bi.
 
  • Haha
Reactions: Uncle_Bob69

bigboaster

Mythical Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Mar 5, 2018
Posts
17,259
Media
4
Likes
75,329
Points
358
Location
Barbados
Verification
View
Sexuality
Pansexual
Gender
Male
The problem with labels is that they seldom fit 100%. I guess I would define myself as Bi, but in my situation, I have no romantic interest in men, just sexual. I grew up in the 80s & 90s when being called gay was the worst thing someone could call you. Have the times changed enough that young men today have no reaction to being recognized as Bi?
Right. These new terms essentially exist to help be more specific where old terms might feel too broad.
 

littleguy2

Superior Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Jul 26, 2007
Posts
3,010
Media
26
Likes
8,771
Points
518
Location
Raleigh (North Carolina, United States)
Verification
View
Sexuality
80% Straight, 20% Gay
Gender
Male
Bi still means two depending on who you ask. Not sure that's "changed" really. A lot of new terminology are just synonyms for already existing identities. Hetero flexible is just bi... under a new name but it might be more suitable for guys who lean towards women with little romantic interest in men. Maybe they think that's more "accurate" than bi.
Interesting how much this describes me. I enjoy cock but have no interest in any relationship or hugging or kissing men, I just to stroke with them and do a bit of oral. I don’t feel bi but think I am fooling myself when I don’t say I am bi
 
  • Like
Reactions: ManchesterTom

StrenghtenMe

Legendary Member
Joined
Jan 19, 2021
Posts
811
Media
0
Likes
1,296
Points
113
Location
Aspen (Colorado, United States)
Sexuality
69% Straight, 31% Gay
You are bisexual if you are turned on by the thought of sex with both men and women/enjoy sex with men and women/ have sexual fantasies etc.

I use such explicit terms instead of "sexually attracted" because a lot of bisexual men try to distance themselves from their "gay side" by sayin things like
"I am not attracted to men I just love gay sex"
"Having same sex fantasies doesn't mean you are bi" etc.etc.

Fine, identify as straight all you want but you are literally indistinguishable from a guy who have exacly the same desires and id as bisexual... which proves how useless are those labels.
 

JD_002

Legendary Member
Joined
Dec 10, 2022
Posts
567
Media
0
Likes
1,068
Points
138
Location
Madrid, Comunidad de Madrid, ES
Sexuality
60% Gay, 40% Straight
Gender
Male
You are bisexual if you are turned on by the thought of sex with both men and women/enjoy sex with men and women/ have sexual fantasies etc.

I use such explicit terms instead of "sexually attracted" because a lot of bisexual men try to distance themselves from their "gay side" by sayin things like
"I am not attracted to men I just love gay sex"
"Having same sex fantasies doesn't mean you are bi" etc.etc.

Fine, identify as straight all you want but you are literally indistinguishable from a guy who have exacly the same desires and id as bisexual... which proves how useless are those labels.
As someone who has never found any value or worth to the "straight" label, I don't understand that either.
 

jthomasmpls

Expert Member
Joined
Jan 28, 2012
Posts
89
Media
0
Likes
165
Points
118
Location
Minneapolis
Sexuality
69% Straight, 31% Gay
Gender
Male
I like Robyn Ochs' definition of Bisexuality:

"I call myself bisexual because I acknowledge that I have in myself the potential to be attracted – romantically and/or sexually – to people of more than one gender, not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree.”
 

daftman

Admired Member
Joined
Sep 23, 2008
Posts
622
Media
4
Likes
977
Points
323
Location
Minneapolis (Minnesota, United States)
Sexuality
69% Straight, 31% Gay
Gender
Male
You are bisexual if you are turned on by the thought of sex with both men and women/enjoy sex with men and women/ have sexual fantasies etc.

I use such explicit terms instead of "sexually attracted" because a lot of bisexual men try to distance themselves from their "gay side" by sayin things like
"I am not attracted to men I just love gay sex"
"Having same sex fantasies doesn't mean you are bi" etc.etc.

Fine, identify as straight all you want but you are literally indistinguishable from a guy who have exacly the same desires and id as bisexual... which proves how useless are those labels.
good points, I appreciate the sentiment, and share it....my wife and I are both sensual, physical and sexual, and bi. (Not active but would be for sure.) For me, or her as well, the idea of an attractive guy, or couple or woman, that we were attracted to, well, let's go! I love women the most, but would bend over in a minute for a man....
 
  • Like
Reactions: Andrej_u

WilliamG

Worshipped Member
Verified
Gold
Cammer
Joined
May 31, 2018
Posts
3,134
Media
40
Likes
11,753
Points
433
Location
Los Angeles, California, US
Verification
View
Sexuality
69% Straight, 31% Gay
Gender
Male
Bisexual. Maybe not the same as "bi-romantical".
Lots of us "bi" guys love women for everything they are. But men only for the sex... Not the romance or emotional ties. Simple.
 

FrankieGuile

Admired Member
Joined
Apr 12, 2023
Posts
870
Media
0
Likes
788
Points
103
Location
San Diego, California,United States
Sexuality
50% Straight, 50% Gay
It seems to be a spectrum of types" of bisexuals that post in this section but sometimes it does get confusing to see so many replies from guys who "don't like anything on a man except the cock". I find it odd to hear self-identified bisexuals describe their attractions this way. This strikes me more as some type of cock fetish or paraphilia as opposed to sexual attraction to men?

How are some of you actually defining the word, and based on that why opt for that label instead of straight or heteroflexible perhaps? I'm curious. I have heard of "straight" guys who would essentially describe similar feelings but wouldn't identify as bisexual.
...defining the word to describe a male who is sexually aroused by and attracted to other males (no matter specific to one aspect of a man or generalized) and sexually aroused by and attracted to other females (no matter specific to one aspect of a woman or generalized). In my definition, no distinction between "bisexual" and "heteroflexible" exists. Creating a new word for the same thing does not say anything differently. In my definition, "straight" men describing sexual arousal and attraction to another man would be bisexual because their behavior defines who they are no matter how they identify. Their behavior counter to their identification does not change my definition. A duck quacks and waddles even though it might claim to be an elephant.
 

badnicky1

Cherished Member
Joined
Jan 17, 2007
Posts
168
Media
0
Likes
310
Points
543
Location
TN, USA
Sexuality
60% Straight, 40% Gay
Gender
Male
It seems to be a spectrum of types" of bisexuals that post in this section but sometimes it does get confusing to see so many replies from guys who "don't like anything on a man except the cock". I find it odd to hear self-identified bisexuals describe their attractions this way. This strikes me more as some type of cock fetish or paraphilia as opposed to sexual attraction to men?

How are some of you actually defining the word, and based on that why opt for that label instead of straight or heteroflexible perhaps? I'm curious. I have heard of "straight" guys who would essentially describe similar feelings but wouldn't identify as bisexual.
Frankly I would never use that label.