How Do You Define Friendship?

[nudeyorker]

Thanks for all of your input everyone. Since my friend died last month I have not been able to shake the blue funk I'm in and have been taking a long trip down memory lane. This discussion has helped.

 

[TheRob]

I'm sorry man : o (

 

[actioncfc]

I have a lot of associates. I also havea large group of high school friends and we meet upa few times a year. All my good friends have all gotten married and I was left behind. However if I was to ask for anything they would show up in no time. My best friend first dissed me by asking his dad to be his bestman in his wedding. I am glad they are close, but we shared some goodtimes and hardtimes too. I thought after 20 years of friendship we were closer than that, but his dad is cool and I even call him dad. Now that he has kids I have not seen him in a year, but as I said if I needed him he would be here for me. I am at a point where I am friendly w everyone, but trust few people. A true friend is hard to find!

 

[thickpex]

Founded on LOYALTY, TRUST, RESPECT, and (SACRIFICIAL) LOVE

 

[Capitolhillguy]

I am a bit jaded and cynical about friendship. 27 of my close friends died of HIV over a decade ago, and with the exception of 2 other friends who have been good pals for over a decade, all I have are some neighbors, co workers and 2 good groups that I belong to.None are really close to me. I tried to cultivate some new friends over the past 2 years but none lasted more than a year. I am lucky that my siblings and I are close and we talk on the phone every week. Just this last month a friend I've known for my entire life has ended our relationship because of encroaching mental illness. I've learned not to be sentimental and to rely on myself. I cannot conceive of the concept of people having either a lover or a friend one spends time with every day or so. Such will probably never be part of my experience.

 

[lokican]

The difference between a friend and an acquaintance is if you can call them up to hang out and it's not awkward. Also a friend will tell you what you need to hear not what you want to hear.

I have had many friends, in different groups and social circles. I move around a bit, it's odd really I get close to people and then move to another place and make brand new friends. You have to make an effort to keep in touch with people, and friends tend to put in the effort that they want to in a friendship.

 

[D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah]

I don't have "typical" friendships, as in i can go for weeks at a time without talking to most of them. But it is important that they are there to listen when i need them to, and vice versa. They don't necessarily need to say anything of significance, have all the answers or cheer me up, they just have to listen.

 

[Maxime_]

I can say what is not friendship to me....

-It is not real friendship when You fuck or do sexual things together!I am sorry but this is sick!a real friendship shouldn't have sexual concerns.It always turns out to be troubled in the end...

-The basis for a long lasting friendship is that there's no attraction between each other.This doesn't mean you have to go out with ugly people,but there MUST be very good reasons not to be together: you are not attracted,you are not interested in getting more etc. If there is attraction,one day you find yourself in love of in bed,depends on the situation!it never works!

-A friend is not the one you see and hear once in month/two months.It is not true that this factor is not important. A relationship,for its own nature,must grow with you everyday.This doesn't mean you have to go out together every day,but not even once in a long while,but if you are live very distant.At least a good friend feels the need to call you as soon as he can.I am always suspicious of those who call me every 2/3 months.They're not people I could count on if I were in need...

-A friend is not just the one you go out with everyday.You can go out with someone everyday just for many reasons: you don't have anyone else,you jut appreciate to go out in sort of good company,you feel the need to talk to someone etc. I find myself out with people just not to stay at home or just because I don't dislike their companies or want to laugh a bit.But friendship is something far deeper....

-A friend is not the one who calls you or asks you out once in a while and starts talking about his/her own problems almost without letting you talk about yours.I knowmany people who are so!Friendship is an exchange,not a monologue made by two people.

-A friend is not the one that if you are in need or if you feel very bad,they are not there for you.A true friend would listen to your problems also at 3am just to make you smile and a bit less sad.

-A friend is not the one who hides you things.A good friend is an open book and has no secrets and no off topics or taboos for you!

Does it make any sense to you?;-)

 

[D_Portelay Porquesword]

True friends are a gift.

 

[nudeyorker]

I ran into an old friend out of the blue today and we went for coffee... It really helped me see myself again. I think I'm seeing things in the world that I stopped bothering to see for some reason. This experience today has been such a gift.

 

[hrdhatdad]

Good friends are the people that stick.

 

[rbkwp]

uuhhmmm
still remains
Loyalty
for me ..

 

[D_BenJo_Ahanakokolele]

it's hard to dictate what makes a friendship with someone because everyone is different and but when you have a friend and i mean really have a friend, then you know. You don't ask or question it and you trust that person with you health and money. Even more so than you're lover.

 

[ths1973]

someone you typically don't mind making time for, to do or say things that are unrelated with your work or studies. and vice-versa.

 

[516778]

One of the better quotes or phrases I've heard that describes friendship for me is "if you aren't there for me when I'm down then you won't be there for me when I'm up" I think it signifies that if someone you consider a friend isn't there for when you times are tough, rough, hard, or just down right crappy then they surely they won't be needed when I'm doing really well. If that makes sense at all.

 

[tbrguy]

A friend is someone you can call if you need help moving...

...a good friend is someone you can call if you need help moving a body.​