How do you get over a crush on a straight guy?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by D_Dennis Anyone, Mar 31, 2009.

  1. D_Dennis Anyone

    D_Dennis Anyone New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2008
    Messages:
    40
    Likes Received:
    0
    so yea...that is the question....

    He is one f my best friends, really hot, smart, funny, nice body, is packing pretty well......

    but he is straight. How do i get over him? I dn't really have other gay friends to talk to....I have had this crush on him for three years now. I try to meet other people just to help me ge over him but it just never seems to work....

    i guess i am too obsessed with him....how do accomlish this without compromising our friendship??? I want to remain friends with him and I'll put myself up to the challenge..

    Any tips/ideas/thoughts/comments?
    Like how did you do it???
     
  2. slcnewlife64

    slcnewlife64 New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2008
    Messages:
    139
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    5
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Salt Lake City
    just be far away from him.
     
  3. flame boy

    flame boy Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Feb 4, 2008
    Messages:
    8,889
    Likes Received:
    5
    As harsh as it may sound you will just have to move on. There is no one right way to get over someone, it takes time and may be difficult. You should try and think of it that he would never give you anything in return, it would be totally one sided and thats not good for relationships - it doesn't sound as great when you think of it like that. Also another bit of great advice is this - his shit stinks like everyone elses - he may seem like an incredible person to you, but he does have faults, you may not see them but they are there.

    If you want to stay friends there is nothing stopping that, but don't let your emotional feelings cloud your judgement as a friend. Stay strong and try to forget about him in a certain manor. It may take time and it may not be easy but you will move on.
     
  4. invisibleman

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 10, 2005
    Messages:
    9,976
    Likes Received:
    39
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    North Carolina
    Honestly, I used to fall in love with straight guys a lot. THAT WAS WHEN I WAS A TEEN and I didn't know any better. I also didn't have any gay friends...or go to where the gay men are. And my heart got a litte weathered over the experiences. This is what I had to do.

    1. Treat the obsession as your body's hormonal reaction to stimuli.
    2. Learn that everyone cannot love you the way you want them to no matter how in loveable and mancrushable they are.
    3. Keep sex and love feelings separate. Have some guidelines on when to fall in mancrush and when things are sexable.
    4. If you find yourself falling in love with more straight guys than gay guys...you REALLY need to get out in some gay friendly areas.
    5. Put yourself in the straight guys' shoes: Do you really think that it is fair to him to fall in love with him? Do you know you are making things uncomfortable with him and could possibly lose him as a friend?
    6. MEET GAY MEN. MEET MANY. Find some men that you can communicate with.


     
  5. D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

    D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2006
    Messages:
    5,455
    Likes Received:
    14
    It sounds like he's been a good friend so don't start avoiding the guy because you have issues with this attraction. it could be a god idea though to start making some new friends to go out with. Just keep reminding yourself you want him to be happy, and if its the new girlfriend that does that then so be it
     
  6. larocca

    larocca New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2008
    Messages:
    636
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Croatia
    The biggest mistakes I did during one of my crushes was trying to get myself far away from that person and refuse all contact. It only made me want her even more. You should try to find a way to look at that person only as a friend and seek only friendship stuff.

    When in a crush with a str8 guy, you probably hope that someday somehow he'll change his mind or rediscover his feelings for you, but it ain't going to happen as much as you want it.

    I do agree with all the advice that these guys have given you. How do you think he feels about it even though he probably says he feels okay about it?
     
Draft saved Draft deleted