I was with my ex for 9 months and we were engaged. Shit happened (not going into it) and we ended up not working out. She has a 3 year old little girl, who I was helping raise as my own. I had been with many women before her, she had only been with one man before me. She told me I was longer and thicker the him, and constantly pumped up my ego during sex. After breaking up we tried to get back together. Several time we had sex again and made out until 2 weeks ago. Well it ended up not working. During the break up time I had a single one night stand. And she met a man through online dating that she slept with and spent a few weekends with him. Well this hurt, because not only did I not keep her sexually, it was like... I could not please her as bf, not just as a sex partner. You know what I mean. Well we had sex after they did they thing, and she told me I was an inch longer nad he was a tad thicker. Well I have heard from here and others that girth is more important then length so I felt pretty down. But she assured me she preferred length over girth, I get really hard and perfectly straight. Said how she felt like she was being stabbed deep and you know reassured me adn made me feel better about it. Come find out later after last time I was down there. I helped her move as a friend even though we were not together and I knew we werent going to be. Well I made love to her again several times thoughout the weekend but she seemed to want me to finger her more then fuck her again. Was this because the other guy was bigger? Or because our lack of relationship made sex harder for her to cope with emotionally, that fingers were somehow less then sex with penile penetration? I found out from her this weekend something harsh. We had been talking on the phone thursday and she told me how great I was out of bed even, And talking about maybe getting back together and camping on my birthday (this saturday). Then for the next 2 days I could nto get ahold of her by calls or texts. She had gone and seen this same guy again and camped in a tent with him. I was also told by a mututal friend of mine that he gave her an orgasm, which previously only I had done, and that he was same length as me but thicker. Which she told a friend she enjoyed. Frankly it boils down to several things. She told me she was not talking to thisguy at all, yet she still was. His dick is bigger then mine, so maybe she never enjoyed me at all? I love her still and another man is sleeping with her and she wants nothing to do to me I want peopels fair opinions. But please do not flame me, Im in a fragile enough state right now. I had fucked other women before her, but never made love to her. I was going to marry this girl. The day after she and I called it off 3 months ago I lost my job the day after. And had to move 3 hours away from her to be with family so I could support myself. I feel used, I supported her the entire time we were together, she never had to pay for anything, I was happy at the time. I took care of her. She had bills from previous marriage she had to pay huge ones. But right after she finished paying them off I was broken up with. Maybe used me then? How about when I helped her move and next weekend she was with another man. I'm very good at reading people, normally, did my love allow me to get played like a fool? Is she going to keep me dangling like this? I know its stupid but if she is ever going to call me again, I love her still and taht little girl, so Id be there. Setting myself up for another failure. Maybe I'm a fool, sitting here writing this? I am not sure, I never loved someone and the good times outweight the bad. Its not so bad that shes gone I guess, maybe its cause somebody else has her its made worse? Im afraid to open up again and Im horrible at meeting girls, Im extroverted completely but towards women I like and get attracted to Im awfully shy. Please again do not insult me but be honest. It would be greatly appreciated.