How long should I wait?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Imported, Apr 1, 2004.

  1. Imported

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    ItalianStallion: I am dating a girl, who has been hurt a few times, she has been cheated on and such. I want her to know that I am not like those guys, and that I am not looking for a quick fling, I like this girl a lot, we have been seeing each other for close to a month. I was wondering how long should I wait on sex, I don't want her to think I am weak for not being aggressive, but i don't want her to think that I am moving fast, when it feels right I am sure it will happen, but I am new to dating, so I just don't want to mess things up, so how long should I wait, if I want her to know I am a good guy, and trust worthy?
     
  2. Imported

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    ORCABOMBER: It might be a good idea to let her dictate the pace, I couldn't say what she's like (her attitude to sex and that), but the last thing you want to do is rush her, let her trust you, see you for the "man" (yes, that thread again) that you are.
     
  3. Imported

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    Tender: well if you are wanting a long term relationship

    you need to wait longer than a month in my opinion.

    i mean 30 whole days? !

    Tender
     
  4. Imported

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    Javierdude22: I personally would wait another month, she might make the move in the meantime, and it won't be weird yet to not have had sex in two months. After that, If she doesn't make the move, simply tell her what you told us exactly and honestly, and that you will wait whenever she is ready.
     
  5. GottaBigOne

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    Wait for her to make the moves. I think girls prefer it that way, especiially if they are young. The last thing a girl needs with sex is pressure. She'll open up eventually.

    I did this with my current gf. We met when we were 15 and I ddin't make any sort of move on her, we talked before every step we took, and she was the one who brought up intercourse. i think this si the main reason why she has such a healthy veiw about sex to this day, and is able to be multiorgasmic and as into it as I am, sometimes more so!
     
  6. benderten2001

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    I agree it seems best to wait and allow the matter of "when" to evolve all on its own.

    Many women would wonder about the sincerity of the man to cultivate a long-term relationship if he's proving too anxious to move things along. The "sex part" is worth the wait if the relationship has been built for the correct reasons and is (by then) "solid enough" for both parties to mutually be ready for the magic moment when it finally arrives.

    I think men in this day and age have to fight culture and "peer pressure" to accept waiting. That's too bad. Good relationships are hard to come by. The woman's feelings HAVE to count...the earlier the better. Waiting would be the correct way to go for many couples. Sadly, they may not always know that. They think they have to conform to "what's expected" ...not to what's best.
     
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