How romantic are you?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by SensualGoth, Sep 9, 2007.

  1. SensualGoth

    SensualGoth New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 20, 2007
    Messages:
    217
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    5
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    San Antonio, Texas
    Do you have to be in the same room with the love of your life to show you love them or can you do other things as well like call them, send them flowers, leave a note etc....?

    I am super romantic. I will do anything to put a smile on my significant other's face , that is if they would let me, some guys won't weird or what?

    In the past I have made many romantic dinners with red or white wine.

    I have left notes in the form of poems in writing or in text messages.

    I have used rose petals as decoration on the table with long candle sticks glimmering ,casting a shadow upon the wall.

    I have given full body massages each time after a kisses upon thy skin.

    Told the one in the past I loved them and meant it each time.

    I've lost weight just by being in love....

    Love is a grand thing..... I'm so romantic , IT HURTS....

    What does a woman have to do to receive some flowers?
     
  2. Osiris

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2007
    Messages:
    2,725
    Likes Received:
    5
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Wherever the dolphins are going
    She shouldn't have to do anything. I'll admit I forget to remember how wonderful my wife is from time to time, but I send her flowers for no reason. She has boxes upon boxes of baubles and trinkets because I'll see something and get it for her. Do stupid little things like nearly killing myself to plant the rose bushes around our house that she loves so much.

    I'd send you flowers, I just don't want to end up in divorce court when the charge statement comes. :biggrin1:
     
  3. Not_Punny

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2007
    Messages:
    5,542
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    1,206
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    California
    Hmmmmmm. Me myself, I'm quasi-romantic. For me, it became an area of
    "difficulty" because so many times in the past my romantic gestures fell flat.

    But I'm working on opening that side of me up again. In fact, your thread has inspired me to do something romantic today. Don't know what yet, but I'll think of something. :wink:

    - - - - - -

    And as far as "What does a girl need to do to get some flowers" -- I have never succeeded at this. It seems that men are either flower givers, or they're not -- and even flower-givers sometimes have dry spells (trouble at work, recent friction in the relationship, etc.).

    I could be completely off base, but I think that all men are flower givers. There are some "hopeless ones" (whom I generally believe were cat and lizard torturers, and have limited empathy with humans and animals), but most men are dreadfully romantic.

    Several things, however, can "stunt" their "romanticity" --

    -- A bad relationship with their mother (although this can also make someone doubly-romantic because they're making up for lost time)

    -- Bad past relationships (one bad woman can sour the romantic side of an otherwise good man)

    Also, some men have completely different "romantic styles" --

    The "romantic mechanic" -- this guy shows his romantic feelings for a woman by fixing things: changing the oil in the car, fixing a leaky faucet, moving furniture. These are the "flowers" that they give their gal.

    The "pennywise romantic" -- this guy shows his romantic feelings by saving money for the future (for a down payment on a house, financial security). These men are romantically boring, but if you have one, you might be able to loosen him up if you acknowledge what it is that he IS doing.

    Etc. etc. etc. Maybe I'll write a book on it someday if it isn't already written!

    I honestly think that once men find (or rediscover) that romance gets them what they want from a woman, they will indulge it. You might not be able to get him to change his style, but (a) he will be happier, and (b) you will be happier because you can see a direct relationship between YOUR romantic gifts and HIS romantic gifts, and you won't feel like you're getting ignored or that he's intentionally withholding "return romance" from you.
     
  4. B_Swimming Lad

    B_Swimming Lad New Member

    Joined:
    May 8, 2007
    Messages:
    744
    Likes Received:
    5
    I'm really romantic if I'm gonna get somthing out of it :wink:
     
  5. B_New End

    B_New End New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 22, 2007
    Messages:
    3,029
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    WA
    super romantic with girlfriend number one

    felt stupid after we broke up

    not very romantic with girlfriend 2

    promised myself it would be different next time

    super romantic with girlfriend 3

    felt stupid after we broke up


    I think you see the pattern
     
  6. Principessa

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2006
    Messages:
    19,494
    Likes Received:
    28
    Gender:
    Female
    Don't break up with them and you won't feel stupid. :tongue::smile: Problem solved.

     
  7. Not_Punny

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2007
    Messages:
    5,542
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    1,206
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    California
    ... (weird!) (double posting mistake!)
     
  8. arliss

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2006
    Messages:
    2,780
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    9
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New York

    thanks for the flowers...or was it your wife that sent them ???:biggrin1:
     
  9. SensualGoth

    SensualGoth New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 20, 2007
    Messages:
    217
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    5
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    San Antonio, Texas

    lmao good one ....


    me too like a "O" on a regular basis?
    hahahaha
     
  10. B_Hung Jon

    B_Hung Jon New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2007
    Messages:
    5,008
    Likes Received:
    16
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Los Angeles, California
    I don't feel that being romantic should be something I do just because my g/f wants me to. If I really love and care about her, then showing it is pretty natural. I want to please the girl I care about. It's only natural. I like the natural expressions of romance best.
     
  11. Osiris

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2007
    Messages:
    2,725
    Likes Received:
    5
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Wherever the dolphins are going
    Must have been the wife. She is bored with roses and moving on to jewelry. :wink:
     
  12. IntoxicatingToxin

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 10, 2006
    Messages:
    10,133
    Likes Received:
    152
    I'm fairly romantic. I try not to overdo it, because I don't want it to lose it's magic. But when I'm in a relationship, I always try to get my man small gifts on random occasions for no specific reason. Most of the men I've dated aren't into flowers, but I have done that on occasion as well. I pay really close attention to things they want, and I make a mental list. If we're walking through the mall, and they notice a cool shirt or something and comment on how much they like it, the first thing I think is "Cha-ching! That's what I'm getting him next..." When it comes to guys being romantic towards me, I feel basically the same way. I don't want someone who's gushy everyday... that's just gross to me, and it gets really boring really fast. I would rather have someone do a few small things here and there than make a big to-do on a regular basis. Little notes saying "I love you!", foot massages after a long day, those are the kinds of things I like to give and receive. :smile:
     
  13. B_New End

    B_New End New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 22, 2007
    Messages:
    3,029
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    WA
    I didn't know that was romatic, I thought that was standard relationship faire.
     
  14. IntoxicatingToxin

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 10, 2006
    Messages:
    10,133
    Likes Received:
    152
    Well, it hasn't been standard in my relationships... lol.
     
  15. simcha

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2007
    Messages:
    2,242
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Over The Rainbow
    I love being a romantic, when it's appreciated. I'm not big on gifts because to me material things just don't do it for me. I like a guy who wants me to be present. Write him some poetry. Walk with him on the beach at sunset. Take him up to the Berkeley/Oakland Hills to watch the sun set over the Bay as the fog rolls in through the Golden Gate. Also, I like to be wooed with humor, intelligence, wit, and creativity.
     
  16. lafever

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2007
    Messages:
    3,179
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    82
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    U.S.
    Yes there are romantic people left in the world but you have to be paitient if you want to find them, remember that old song , looking for love in all the wrong places, it`s true. Also you can`t go on appearences alone, some of the best bullshit artist and con men are the best dressed men you`ll ever lay your eyes on, they get you with their bling. And yes their is hippie bling, goth bling, prep bling, stoner bling etc., etc., etc., believe it.
    It`s just like plumage on a wild bird and only the ones with the best show and plumage trick the females of the species into mating. Well guess what, us guys can be the same way with some flowers, don`t be so easily wooed into courtship, or tricked into false romance. To find a real romantic, the first clue is that they`re not in a hury. The second clue is that even after they get some p****y they still do all the same romantic stuff they did to get sex the first time. If you go from a fancy resturant to mcdonalds that is usually a pretty good clue as what their true intentions are and will continue to be if you alow it.
    The gamers figure once they`ve wowed you then they can play your feelings with shit like; What? McDonalds aint good enough for you, and try to say your a gold digger when in fact their the ones who invited you to a fancy resturant or showered you with kindness as a deception to get what they wanted. They`ll turn it aroung on you and make you feel like a heel when their the real bastards.
    This is an interesting topic, i`ve noticed that some women will base all their romances on an old relationship that didn`t work out but was fantastic in the beginning. So everything that old boyfriend did to get some p***y all the boyfriends that come after have to compete with his fake charms and imitation love and romance. I`ll get crap from women like, john doe used to do this and that, and i`ll respond, if john doe was so fricken awsome where is he now.
    The majority of men will tell a women anything she wants to hear, or they`ll shower them with cheap knockoff gifts, and then once they get what they want they move on to the the next victom. After awhile these women who fall for the same crap over and over are no longer victoms they`re volenteers, trying to relive an old memory. They`ll try desperatly to relive the one good memory and forget about the 999 shitty ones they had with an old loser just to have the one good memory. The sad truth is if you do what you always did you`ll get what you always got.
    So your probly wondering how does one break this vicious cycle, it starts with not falling for every guy who buys you flowers. After you`ve been with a guy for awhile just because he buys you flowers doesn`t always mean he loves you, he could be trying to cover up some guilt.
    I`ll get my girlfriend flowers but thats not all, they`ll come with a card, a special bag with fluffed colored tissue and some chocolats along with a nice gift, preferably something that costs atleast $50 bucks or more. Then i`ll cook her a meal fit for a queen. If a man really loves you he`ll take the time to put a package of sorts together, and prepare for the evening days or weeks in advance, that shows that he took the time and didn`t just grab some flowers while he was buying condoms and beer at the check out line.
    Also i can`t always shower her with gifts so i`ll take her out for nature walks and we`ll put a blanket out and enjoy a nice day out. There is no substitution for taking time out of ones life to show how much you care, those moments are priceless.

    lafever

    p.s. This might not have helped you at all and some times i`m embarasse to be a male as so many are assholes. so just remember you can`t always judge a book by its cover, time is the true test of love and romance. If i was a women i`d take true love over flowers that could have been picked from the neighbors yard on the way to my door anyday, the first clue is that there`s no vase. lol
     
  17. simcha

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2007
    Messages:
    2,242
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Over The Rainbow
    Lafever, you have become a very dear member of this place in such a short time. And, in a way you have become dear to me. You are such a sweet and gentle man. You're lady is quite fortunate to have you. :smile:
     
  18. B_New End

    B_New End New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 22, 2007
    Messages:
    3,029
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    WA
    LAfever... I'm sorry, but that was some straight player hatin' shit right there.

    You take a girl out to a restaurant, you got to take her to a nice restaurant every time?

    And BTW, for some guys, it is *really* hard to buy flowers, because it can be as embarassing as buying condoms.

    Furthermore... $50... wow. Lafever has decreed, if it ain't $50, it ain't shit.

    And is it romantic to buy the meal? especially if the household finances are shared anyways?

    All guys do it for the pussy, yes, but all chicks do it for the dick... but both of them want something more too... it's just hard sometimes to keep it.
     
  19. lafever

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2007
    Messages:
    3,179
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    82
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    U.S.
    New End,

    Yes, most guys just want some ass, and it f***s it up for us decent guys.

    And yes, i do take my girlfriend to nice resturants, if i can`t afford it then i cook her a meal at home.

    Also i`ll bet you don`t think twice about spending $50 bucks on a bag of weed.

    And yes it`s always a good thing to buy the meal for a women, especially if it`s your idea to take her out, why would you invite her out to dinner and expect her to pay. Let her make that decision to buy your meal if it`s her idea to take you out for dinner and she invites you.

    Last but not least, all women, just like all men, are not into just getting some action, believe it or not most people are just trying to meet the right one. And yes there are people who are just after one thing, to those people i say cut out all the bullshit and just get the booze and go straight to bed, why beat around the bush, the next morning don`t make any promises you can`t keep just haul ass.


    lafever
     
  20. B_New End

    B_New End New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 22, 2007
    Messages:
    3,029
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    WA
    I disagree. Most single guys, like most women, are actually lonely, and looking for "the one". Its just bluster and bravado that makes them say otherwise.

    Everybody is fucking it up for everybody else.... because everybody has issues. It's not just guys making single life difficult. ;)


    That would last me a year.

    And I am *really* poor, so $50 is alot ot me, and I would definuitely think twice... I could take a girl out once or twice to a $50 restaraunt, btu after that, I would hope she would cu tme some slack and settle for a pho house. If not... well... "What!? Pho isn't good enough for you?"


    Which would include "action" for life. If you look at it that way, you'll see why lots of people are afraid of hopeless romantics. Their intentions are no more pure than anyone elses, they just wrap it up in a diamond and chivalry. That's why so many "nice guys" get confused. So many women prefer the more realistic, "hey, lets fuck, and if nothing comes of it, so be it" types.
     
Draft saved Draft deleted