How to be a good wife :)

[13788]

bblumbee: I think there is give and take into all relationships. I am a traditionalist by virtue of my upbringing. However, I am also a modern woman who has been instructed by her mother not to make the same mistakes that most women made 20 and more years ago.

If that is feminism then I want to run as President of the organization!

As stated earlier, I think we all have our places. Yet, their also a thing of abuse of power and equality. Think about it... both sexes need to be equalible but there are distinct roles both genders play. As long as those barriers are not abused and misconstrued, I think most women would think they were fair.

So, were do I sign up? :-/

bb

 

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Bard: Equalible?
Have you just made that word up?

Bard.

 

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Tender: [quote author=bblumbee link=board=women;num=1081249042;start=40#40 date=05/03/04 at 13:51:37] I am also a modern woman who has been instructed by her mother not to make the same mistakes that most women made 20 and more years ago.
bb[/quote]


what sort of mistakes??
that is nothing knew.
i'm sure Eve told her daughters... 'hey, dont eat that!'

i dont see how mothers teaching their daughters about that makes one any more or less 'modern'?

or what kind of mistakes women made 20 yrs ago, that women havent made for thousands of years?

OR if we are talking about the 'mistakes' of getting married young? having kids? staying at home? putting your spouses wants above your own? not working 2 jobs to pay for 'junk' families -really- dont need?

Seems like the traditional 'woman-mother-wife' role is sorely frowned on in today's 'modern' world.
such a shame too...

Well, count me out if thats the case ???

Tender

 

[13788]

bblumbee: Bard, sweetheart, I never proclaimed to be a master of English or spelling, especially considering it is NOT my first language.

Your amusement to my newly found vocabulary in itself is flattering. HA HA...

I am completely aware of what you are trying to do, or at least it is my premise that your jovial expressions are an attempt to push buttons and cause one to be 'emotional.' If that is the case, try harder.

As for me, I will try to begin proofing my comments before sending them, or at least make a concerted effort.

bb

 

[13788]

bblumbee: Thanks, Tender for your comments... If I may, I would like to attempt to clarify...

Modern in the idea that I can achieve whatever in life I want. Modern in the idea that I do not to have to settle for something other than my own dreams. Modern in that I can have those same careers that were once thought of as being a male dominated... and the list could go on.

The mistakes I am making reference to are things that I've heard a lot of women say they regret. Things such as not pursuing a high profile job because of its responsibilities. Mistakes of women never considering putting their wants or desires above their spouses and never letting them know about what they want. Mistakes about believing women should get married early and have a family and become solely dependent on a man. Mistakes about not having a voice within a family structure. Mistakes about being solely submissive to the husband, regardless of your position and status, etc. This list could go on as well...

All I am saying is that women have the right to pursue and want these things. It does not make them less of a woman nor does it disrupt their role as a woman.

We are raised and conditioned to be women-mother-wife. It is innate. In the same token, however, we do have desires and wants and should be able to pursue those without others feeling threatened or thinking that we've uprooted our traditional roles.

That is all.....

bb

 

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wvalady1968: BB, I'm a third generation working woman. My grandmother trained to be a nurse during WWII. Mom worked full time the whole time we were growing up.

When you mentioned the mistakes women made 20 years ago, my thoughts were different from what you mentioned. Mom jokes that hers was the generation of the "liberated woman", and she was "liberated" to be allowed to hold down two full time jobs: work AND motherhood. [Because back then, the women might have been liberated, but the men were slower to follow.]

Those times are still changing, but it's good that both genders are encouraged, for the most part, to do what works for them. There are so many more options open to people and few people criticizing them for not fitting into a preset mold. [But even that can have its downside. lol]

 

[jonb]

[quote author=Tender link=board=women;num=1081249042;start=40#42 date=05/04/04 at 07:00:41]what sort of mistakes??
that is nothing knew.
i'm sure Eve told her daughters... 'hey, dont eat that!' [/quote]
Actually, few women are ever 'born' in the Bible. Apparently they were all made from ribs. LOL

 

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Bard: Adam and Eve?
Incest was natural back then I assume.

 

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monster: I like to look at the whole picture of sexual equality. there are women who prefer to do the things men do and vise versa and are damn good at it to say the least  but i feel that there are things men are generally good at and things women are good at and if i decide to get married and my wife is smarter than me then i guess im a little more fortunate. im one of those guys that don't really care if my wife is modern or from the victorian age, it's what ever she prefers to be, isn't that what it means to be sexually equal???

 

[jonb]

[quote author=Bard link=board=women;num=1081249042;start=40#47 date=05/04/04 at 22:12:00]Adam and Eve?
Incest was natural back then I assume.[/quote]
Actually, the Bible's relatively lax on incest compared to other traditions. Here's a list of Biblical laws wrt incest. Note that patrilineal parallel cousins are actually favored, judging by the genealogy.

 

[MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK]

Originally posted by Bard@Apr 27 2004, 12:24 AM
bblumbee
I sign my name Bard, not Bart.


Bard.

You ask me, the way he supports this article, he ought to shave off the "d" and replace it with an "f"! :lol:

 

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Tender:

Originally posted by bblumbee@May 4 2004, 03:50 PM
Thanks, Tender for your comments...  If I may, I would like to attempt to clarify...

Modern in the idea that I can achieve whatever in life I want.  Modern in the idea that I do not to have to settle for something other than my own dreams.  Modern in that I can have those same careers that were once thought of as being a male dominated...  and the list could go on.

The mistakes I am making reference to are things that I've heard a lot of women say they regret.  Things such as not pursuing a high profile job because of its responsibilities.  Mistakes of women never considering putting their wants or desires above their spouses and never letting them know about what they want.  Mistakes about believing women should get married early and have a family and become solely dependent on a man.  Mistakes about not having a voice within a family structure.  Mistakes about being solely submissive to the husband, regardless of your position and status, etc.  This list could go on as well...

All I am saying is that women have the right to pursue and want these things.  It does not make them less of a woman nor does it disrupt their role as a woman.

We are raised and conditioned to be women-mother-wife.  It is innate.  In the same token, however, we do have desires and wants and should be able to pursue those without others feeling threatened or thinking that we've uprooted our traditional roles.

That is all.....

bb

AH,
thanks for the clarification there!

yes, i disagree with you.

seems clear to me that some jobs are meant to be 'male dominated'.
and i dont see having to be a mother, wife, housekeeper and then adding this so calleed 'liberating' job to the list makes me an equal?
would make me exhausted, and probably would end up frustrated with the whole thing.....

sure alot of women regret some of those things mentioned.
but alot of women dont?

i strive to always put my spouses wants over my own.
thats what makes marriage good.
the thing is--- he strives to return the favor.....

so i guess i still want to be counted 'out' on this one.........


Tender