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How to Convince Boyfriend to..

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by 543536, Mar 31, 2010.

  1. 543536

    543536 Guest

    Okay, my boyfriend isn't really big on having sex.
    However, I sorta am.. (even though I'm a virgin).

    [We have a long distance relationship, but I am visiting him in June, then he is coming back to visit me in August then we're driving up from Texas to California]

    Anyways, we're gonna be moving in together and going to college together in Fall 2o1o. I think and feel he is the one who should take it. However, he isn't really big on doing so since he knows that I promised myself I would stay abstinence..but, I don't think I can wait any longer..

    I need a way to politely hint on that I want him to take my virginity without him thinking I'm just using him for sex. (Which I'm not cause I'm deeply in love with him, even if my mom doesn't exactly like him) We've been going out for a half a year, and our anniversary is on December 2nd. His birthday is on the 28th (of December). I want to give him my virginity as a birthday/anniversary gift after I've given him the PSP he wanted.

    [Yes, I do realize its far to early, but I need some ideas to sit and think about without being plagued with the thoughts on the last minute.]

    If you have any questions please ask? :)
     
  2. EllieP

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    OK, Darling, listen. He says he isn't big on having sex. Trust me. He is. But you can take that as a sign of respect for your virginity. And as for him thinking you're using him for sex - if that isn't the definition of a male fantasy I don't know what is.

    And how long does he think you'll want to stay pristine? Did you give him a date? Or an event? Sounds like he's a decent chap who will wait around for you. So that's good.

    And forget the PSP. It's anti-climactic. Or if you have to give it to him give it first. Then show him your crotchless panties. He'll forget the PSP until after sex. Then instead of turning over and going to sleep he'll play the games until you fall asleep.

    Darling, I'm not going to tell you how to run your life, but it doesn't sound like you're ready for any of this. My suggestion: stay in Texas and go to school there. Yes, move out of the house, for heaven's sakes.

    He may be the guy for you. At 18 I was blind as a bat. I found the guy for me. Gave me a beautiful daughter and over 50 grand in arrears on child support.

    Do what you want to do, but please keep your eyes open.
     
  3. EnglandJ

    EnglandJ Lurker

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    Nice info Ellie, I would probably say that everything you said is right... Also if you want sex with him then try talking about it more with him to give him the idea that your not trying to save yourself any longer as he may be thinking that you are ...

    Good luck but don't rush in... ps I think you have waited long enough :) x
     
  4. D_Geffarde Phartsmeller

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    Errr, you're only 18. I've known people that waited to have sex for many years past 18. Many, many years. You either CAN wait longer because you love him, as you say, or you can't wait any longer and he's not really "the one". Pretty simple.

    I've always had a thing for self-control so my money is on waiting. Don't let the urges control you. Discipline!

    I disagree with Ellie, however. You should leave Texas as soon as possible. Everyone should. That state is backwards.
     
  5. D_Sparroe Spongecaques

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    You can't force him.If he doesnt want to have sex with you then he won't.It will happen when the time is right.He probably knows how important it is to you to abstain so is doing the honourable thing.......either that or hoping you might leap onto him and rip his kecks off :p

    Now,as the mother of 2 18 yr old daughters all i can say to you is.....noooooooooooooooo noooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!! You're too young for all that.
     
  6. dolfette

    dolfette Sexy Member

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    if he says he doesn't want to fuck you then respect his wishes.
     
  7. volvo

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    Wowwww.

    The mention of the PSP is what really made this thread.
     
  8. psidom

    psidom Experimental Member

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    lol. you noticed that too huh.

    i thought dolfettes post was funny.
    (just because of her rape thread)
     
  9. dolfette

    dolfette Sexy Member

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    ahahahahahahahahaha!
     
  10. B_crackoff

    B_crackoff Banned

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    Hell, it's 8 months away. If you're living together, I guarantee he'll be gagging for it, & if you're still together by then, you'll both really have earned it.

    You're way to young & inexperienced to bother about crotchless or kinky stuff.

    Just tie yourself in a big red bow, say " Happy Birthday" & nature will do the rest!
     
  11. D_Sparroe Spongecaques

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    I know,all i can imagine is them 2 having a ripping time and then all dishevelled she presents him with a PSP ROFL!!!!!!!!!!
     
  12. B_crackoff

    B_crackoff Banned

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    A PSP or introducing a willing virgin into sex. No contest!
     
  13. psidom

    psidom Experimental Member

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    ok my honest response to the op...

    like dolfette said respect his wishes,
    but if i was you i would start on birth control and use
    vibes in front of him or just rub yourself around him

    he will be bound to give in, and if you are on birth control
    already and it is in full effect i bet you will persuade him.

    very very very very very easily.:wink:
     
  14. psidom

    psidom Experimental Member

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    lol right...it's some hilarious shite.:biggrin1:
     
  15. Incocknito

    Incocknito Sexy Member

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    The repitition of "he isn't really big" is a "little" bit of a red flag to me.

    It puts the probability of this thread being geniune at less than 50%.

    This thread would be a good way to solicit PM's from horny men. That is all.
     
  16. psidom

    psidom Experimental Member

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    see you are smart like that...

    i just saw PSP and thought wow what a cool girl.:smile:
     
  17. 543536

    543536 Guest

    Lol. I'm willing to do anything for him, just as he is for me. <3
    It was hard enough getting him to open up in telling me what he wants. D;
     
  18. D_Sparroe Spongecaques

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    Take it from those who have been 18 and frisky.....wait until the time is right.....and buy him a game for the PSP instead of offering him your foo foo (cripes i feel like mummy atm :p)
     
  19. Guy-jin

    Guy-jin Legendary Member

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    He is probably insecure sexually (or even generally).

    It is more common than you probably realize, especially in young men.

    Do what you can to make him feel more secure and "safe" with you sexually.

    Also, make sure to get him LittleBigPlanet for his PSP. {:
     
  20. Gillette

    Gillette Sexy Member

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    Foo foo!
    I love it!
     
  21. wildwestend

    wildwestend Lurker

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    Im going to give you my advice regarding your situation......

    Your BF seems like a humble guy. If it was hard to get him to open up in telling you what he wants, your relationship is not ready yet for long term. Talking to eachother, letting eachother know about your feelings, what pleases you, etc... etc... has to be easy in relationships.....

    Secondly, you have been dating for half a year. You mentioned youre in love, which is totally possible. The best thing to do is have a special talk with him, a serious one where you tell him everything you just posted. A talk along the lines of how you have never felt this way about anybody before, how hes constantly on your mind, and how its your desire to show him what he means to you and that everyinch of your body feels that he is the one to take your virginity, but it doesnt end there, after this you must mention that because you love him, if hes not ready to take it from you, or if he feels otherwise, you respect that and are willing to wait until he is ready. This will make him feel much more comfortable.

    Now about your virginity..... All Im going to tell you is that if this feels right, go ahead with it, but your virginity is not something you can get back. Having sex aint all that beleive me. Im not sure from a girls perspective, but I can tell you that sex was the biggest overestimated thing to me that I was soo anxious for in my life, and when it occured, it wasn't all the hype. Thats just me. So.....just make sure your ready for this. Once your V is gone, its gone, and someone else MAY come along taht you wish you gave it to.....

    And the PSP.....all I have to say is WOWZERS....Get him a Nintendo Wii cmon! Ok seriously, all jokes aside....The PSP shouldn't be a gift of that sort, it should not come in play with your virginity and taht special moment. Just buy it for him, and one day when hes sleeping or in the bathroom slip it into his bag or something, don't even give it to him in teh manner your thinking, surprise him, let him open his bag oneday and be shcoked, because honestly its only a PSP, your not giving him an engagement ring....and make sure you give the PSP after you talk about the Virginity issue, and fi you do end up losing it to him...... If he receives it before he may not get an erection because his mind is on Need For Speed.
     
  22. Jathe

    Jathe Experimental Member

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    I dunno, I think I could multitask that PSP... Girlfriend:"Ahhhhh! I'm cumminnnnnggggg!" XD Me:"WOOT! *huff* *huff* I just got the high score!" XD ( <- Angelique, I meant no insult by any of this) I would say tell him how you feel, but if he wants, then yes, you should wait. I understand what it's like to be like that guy. Occasionally I smack myself for not taking some of the chances I had had back in the day, but now I AM kinda happy at times that I didn't go for it. I hear that first few times are not all that great, he need to know that your comfortable, and that you'll cheer him on and all that, and that you WILL wait for him. But be sexy for him too and hint what you want, tease him, wiggle yer butt or something. XD We love being teased, especially if we know the teaser loves us and that all we have to do is ask (we also like to think we are the smart ones in the relationship and that we have "tactics" of some sort that get us the nookie XP). Trust and respect are important for EVERY relationship, you should be able to tell each other anything!
     
    #22 Jathe, Apr 1, 2010
    Last edited: Apr 1, 2010
  23. wildwestend

    wildwestend Lurker

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    Agreed. I'm the same, but I don't feel really bad about it, I don't think about it too much. But I remember times in grade 7 when the girl litteraly told me 'let me suck your dick"....me: "nnaahh Im good"....other moments as well.....

     
  24. THEDUDEofDestiny

    THEDUDEofDestiny Experimental Member

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    psp wins this hands down
     
  25. ferfed

    ferfed Sexy Member

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    ^ careful brett, you cant play the psp too well with your hands down lol
     
  26. B_crackoff

    B_crackoff Banned

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    Well if she gives him the PSP 1st for his birthday, a new game at Xmas, then I can't see he'd even be interested by their anniversary on the 28th.

    He'll be trying to crack that rather than her.

    You can go all day & all night on a PSP too; do it in the bed, bath, lavatory - even over the desk at work, & the late night commuter train home!

    It never says no, & doesn't care if you respect it, or sometimes press the wrong buttons, & is programmed to accommodate three or even 4ways!

    It just knows that you love it, & want it BAD!!!!
     
  27. loganxxx22

    loganxxx22 Sexy Member

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    Well I live in Austin, and we're progressive enough i forget about the redneck idiots I share a state with.

    As far as this post is concerned you're boyfriend seems way uptight. I remember when I was a virgin and uncomfortable around women, but the one who took mine made it quite easy. Seems if it was meant to be he'd know he had a good thing and would let things happen naturally?
     
  28. B_curiousme01

    B_curiousme01 Banned

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    :) good reply! Although, I think Brett can do just about anything he wishes with those golden hands!


    OP: since you are thinking of sex...period... You really should consider birth control and take action on that now. Also carry condems. It may turn out that you just 'can't' wait. Be forwardthinking and protect yourself. Happy Trails to you.
     
  29. Hippie Hollow Girl

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    Ok, you said this is a long distance romance. Have you met the guy in real life? I was just wondering if you have met this guy over the Internet and maybe that is why your mom is putting out the caution light.

    Reason why I am asking this is because when I was your age, that is probably something I would have done. The Internet wasn't around when I was your age, but I loved pen pal letter writing / singles clubs and I can say that it is really easy to get all caught up in a long distance / writing back and forth type relationship.

    Anyways, just thought I would ask. If this is not the case, why does your mother not like the guy? Mother's usually only want the best for their daughters.
     
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