How To Find Gay Men

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deleted8990271

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Hi,
Are there good dating app for gays? (I know about hinge,tinder,Grindr)
 

winesthel945

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There are several discussion threads in this section discussing dating apps. See, e.g., Grinder Or Scruff? Which One Is Better?

The short version is that depending on where you are, each app can have a very different audience. One is not inherently better than the other, and one may be better in some locations than another. In my town, Scruff is very bear-centric, Grindr is very twinky, Jack'd skews very Asian. When I go to other cities, Grindr can be much more mixed, Scruff can be very otter and rugged muscle guys with the bears being on Growlr, and Jack'd can skew very heavily towards Latino and African American men. Similar patterns occur in other countries and major cities, but each is unique. The only way you will know is to check them out for a while and see how they shake out in your area.

Also... surprise! Six months later, the population may have changed and might be completely different. :)

For this reason, many people are on multiple apps... precisely because you never know where you're going to meet someone to your liking. Some people are lazy and don't want to be on multiple apps... that's fine, but they shouldn't complain that they're not meeting a variety of people.

And all the apps can be for both hooking up and for meeting people for relationships. I've hooked up from "dating" apps like Tinder and OKCupid, and I've had multi-year relationships with people met via "hookup" apps. I disagree with anyone who says any app is "hookup" or "dating" oriented, they're all for anything -- which leads to my final point...

Finally: you will get out of it, what you put into it. Communicate your interests clearly and you'll be more likely to find someone interested in that. Looking to date? Say it. Looking to fuck around? Say it. Looking to fuck until you accidentally stumble into a relationship? You and everybody else!

PS: Please have a fucking picture, or send one with your first message. If you won't show your face, most people will assume you're some kind of closeted psychopath or otherwise hiding from the world... and that's not attractive to many people.
 

SgtGirth

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For those who are still in the closet and looking for a safe way to explore, there's a relatively new site out there called Sniffies (sniffies.com/join/5fd72f743f8bc4281033952d). Aside from a really nice innovation (they show where each person is located more or less on a map, instead of just giving you a distance), they do not require you to have an account at all so you can use the service completely anonymously.
 
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I feel like craigslist has become the bottom of the barrel in terms of meeting sane and clean guys. Just some of the weirdest people on that site now.

I wasn't aware there was any hooking up still happening on Craigslist. Back in the day it could be awesome, until they got rid of the personals altogether. The morality police came after them and assumed we were all trafficking little white girls or something.

There is Doublelist, but you do need an account, including a phone number, to use it so it's not as anonymous.
 
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I feel like craigslist has become the bottom of the barrel in terms of meeting sane and clean guys. Just some of the weirdest people on that site now.
Oh, so true. I am guilty oh having posted on there many years ago in the personals, but I'd never do that today.
 

User50986

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I wasn't aware there was any hooking up still happening on Craigslist. Back in the day it could be awesome, until they got rid of the personals altogether. The morality police came after them and assumed we were all trafficking little white girls or something.

There is Doublelist, but you do need an account, including a phone number, to use it so it's not as anonymous.
Just looked up Doublelist. Are they good?
 

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For those who are still in the closet and looking for a safe way to explore, there's a relatively new site out there called Sniffies (sniffies.com/join/5fd72f743f8bc4281033952d). Aside from a really nice innovation (they show where each person is located more or less on a map, instead of just giving you a distance), they do not require you to have an account at all so you can use the service completely anonymously.

I'm not the least bit closeted, but wow, before any truly closeted person clicks on that link, buyer beware. I tried it out and it shows your location down to the block level and the side of the street you're on. That is the opposite of anonymous. I suggest people stick with Grindr or Doublelist.
 

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Oh, so true. I am guilty oh having posted on there many years ago in the personals, but I'd never do that today.
Yea even just 3-4 years ago there was still some normal people. I met plenty of interesting guys (not all hookups) but now it's a wasteland.
 

JoeRoscoe

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I wanted to follow up on and amend my post above. Sniffies is actually pretty great. I looked at it in a rural area when I posted above, which is why I gave a caution about the location feature. In an urban or suburban area, I can see the location is not exact down to an identifiable level. Whatever concerns people have about that should be outweighed by the unique features of Sniffies. Pretty addictive to see all that's on the site and how easy it makes hooking up. It's probably the future, so I do recommend checking out. Takes a little while to figure it all out but 10/10 once you do.

Thanks, SgtGirth, for the tip.
 

Bob555

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For those who are still in the closet and looking for a safe way to explore, there's a relatively new site out there called Sniffies (sniffies.com/join/5fd72f743f8bc4281033952d). Aside from a really nice innovation (they show where each person is located more or less on a map, instead of just giving you a distance), they do not require you to have an account at all so you can use the service completely anonymously.

sounds like a lot of blank profiles and sounds dangerous.
 

JoeRoscoe

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sounds like a lot of blank profiles and sounds dangerous.

I'm not sure what this means or why it would be "dangerous." Someone would be an idiot to meet someone else without exchanging pics and chatting first. You're not going to show up at someone's house on the basis of a blank profile alone, any more than you would on Grindr or A4A, both of which allow "blank profiles." Unless a pic is attached, Doublelist is basically "blank profiles" too.

And, yes, anyone can lie online, whether they have a blank profile or a pic attached to their profile. Hooking up with an app always carries a certain amount of risk, but that risk is not a function of a "blank profile."

If anything, Sniffie makes meeting up in public places (albeit usually cruising grounds) many times easier. It also facilitates video chatting, so you can see beyond a static pic.
 

SgtGirth

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sounds like a lot of blank profiles and sounds dangerous.

I've used it quite a lot and have not had any bad experiences. It strikes me as no more or less dangerous than Craigslist was back in the day.

Now obviously I take steps to make sure I'm covered; someone else knows what's going on and where I'm going or who's coming over. I don't put myself in bad situations (e.g. this is not the place for trying out some rope bondage).

Mostly guys are horny bastards and this offers a discreet way for a lot of them to explore and indulge their sexuality.
 

tito21

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I have a lot of luck finding guys who are LTR oriented on Scruff, Jack'd, Tumblr and Grindr. I've lived in 4-5 major cities.

Don’t take this as an insult or attack on you.

You have a lot of luck finding guys for LTR on hooked up apps, and yet, here you are, still scouring the web for Mr Right?
 

shady ace

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Don’t take this as an insult or attack on you.

You have a lot of luck finding guys for LTR on hooked up apps, and yet, here you are, still scouring the web for Mr Right?
Touche. Just because they were LTR oriented and we might have had a connection doesn't mean Ive found the right guy yet.