Hope this doesn't bore you and i don't go on too long but need some friendly advice because really don't have anyone i can ask personally,
Anyway here goes - i was with my partner for 26 years, we meet when i was 17 and i loved him very much, the sex ended after maybe 10 years as he was on anti-depressants and stopped be able or interested in sex, as i loved him it did not bother me, I never found sex in other places or cheated (truth), the no sex really did not bother me that much at the time (may sound strange, not sure). Anyway after 26 years my partner told me he was leaving me as he had found someone else, and since he left i pretty much found out for the whole 26 years he was having sex/relationships with other men and he told me he should have left a long time ago, which pretty much left me devastated as you can imagine, i had spent the last 16 years not having sex for a lie, for a person that was having sex elsewhere and having a life i knew nothing about.
So as he went on with his life with a new partner, a sex life ect, here i am 3 1/2 years later still on my own and seriously i am not sure what to do with the rest of my life at the grade old age of 47, nearly 20 years of not having sexual experiences or relationship, i do not know how to start again, how do i get back to having a relationship or even just having sex again - that may sound strange but i really do feel that as it has been so long that maybe that will never happen again, if only my ex-partner had, had the balls to leave years ago maybe i would have found it much easier to start again,but it has been so long, i am scared! apart from the whole relationship thing, just even having sex again scares me, it really does!
So anyway for this - 20 years no sex, overweight, very shy, unconfident guy, how the hell do i ever get back to having a sex life again let alone a relationship?
Any advice would be greatly appreciated, wow can't believe i have done this.
Simon x
Ps Having read this over, before i post it i just wanted to point out that i am happy and not depressed or anything like that, i have my own business, a beautiful house and three beautiful dogs that are my babies, it is just is that enough for the rest of my life!
You can all breathe now. LOL
Anyway here goes - i was with my partner for 26 years, we meet when i was 17 and i loved him very much, the sex ended after maybe 10 years as he was on anti-depressants and stopped be able or interested in sex, as i loved him it did not bother me, I never found sex in other places or cheated (truth), the no sex really did not bother me that much at the time (may sound strange, not sure). Anyway after 26 years my partner told me he was leaving me as he had found someone else, and since he left i pretty much found out for the whole 26 years he was having sex/relationships with other men and he told me he should have left a long time ago, which pretty much left me devastated as you can imagine, i had spent the last 16 years not having sex for a lie, for a person that was having sex elsewhere and having a life i knew nothing about.
So as he went on with his life with a new partner, a sex life ect, here i am 3 1/2 years later still on my own and seriously i am not sure what to do with the rest of my life at the grade old age of 47, nearly 20 years of not having sexual experiences or relationship, i do not know how to start again, how do i get back to having a relationship or even just having sex again - that may sound strange but i really do feel that as it has been so long that maybe that will never happen again, if only my ex-partner had, had the balls to leave years ago maybe i would have found it much easier to start again,but it has been so long, i am scared! apart from the whole relationship thing, just even having sex again scares me, it really does!
So anyway for this - 20 years no sex, overweight, very shy, unconfident guy, how the hell do i ever get back to having a sex life again let alone a relationship?
Any advice would be greatly appreciated, wow can't believe i have done this.
Simon x
Ps Having read this over, before i post it i just wanted to point out that i am happy and not depressed or anything like that, i have my own business, a beautiful house and three beautiful dogs that are my babies, it is just is that enough for the rest of my life!
You can all breathe now. LOL