How to not make this awkard

[sangheili90]

Gee. Maybe I was MGTOW before it had a name. Guess I fell off the wagon.

It is a recent term used online, it basically means a man who is done pursuing relationships "Men going their own way". I refuse to stress myself out by using online dating sites and I will not stoop so low as the bar scene, so I have to just accept that I'll be alone. So sad to think I'll be 27 in March and still can't make this work, I have everything going for me lmfao and it is not enough.

 

[nailz]

So what happened?

 

[sangheili90]

So what happened?

I don't really know, she just doesn't seem interested in me anymore lol. I'm assuming she has a boyfriend or something, it seems to have gone kind of cold since last week after she was staring at my package.

 

[sangheili90]

So what happened?

That or I just haven't been talking to her enough, I wasn't exactly in the habit of talking to her on a personal level everyday.....so perhaps she thinks I'm not interested, I can't say. I'm very introverted, to the point where it may be seen as odd, and often don't feel like conversing with other individuals......It is hard to explain to those who don't have this trait, but there are times where talking to other people is very tiresome and something that takes a lot of energy for me to initiate.

I'm not sure though, last week she was staring hard at my bulge. Another lab when I asked her about herself she looked really deep into my eyes and they were kind of lit up, I think you know what I am saying. And then another lab when I was setting up the microscope I noticed, through my peripheral vision, that she was looking at me in a way that indicated she found me very attractive. I'm really clueless with this shit and get frustrated very easily because I have no experience with women, literally none, and will hit points like this where I have no idea what to do.

 

[nailz]

This isn't the first time I've seen you say you are introverted, awkward, socially inept, etc. I think you're using it as an excuse.

Everyone has awkward moments, everyone fears rejection/embarrassment, and I don't think it's really easy for anyone to open up to another person, to take a risk and express their feelings. If it is easy for someone then I'd suspect they weren't genuine.

You're intelligent and don't seem to be lacking in self-confidence. But you seem to be looking for this perfect player delivery, the perfect approach. It's like you think you need to be super experienced and never show a hint of nervousness or awkwardness in order to attract a woman
Personally I find it repulsive when someone too smooth hits on me, all I can think about is how many other women he's said the same things to.

You're being silly. For every woman that will reject you for being awkward there are two that will find your vulnerability charming and adorable Have you ever even tried the 'maybe a little awkward but genuine' approach? What do you have to lose? Really?

The perfect partner accepts you for how you are. You can train yourself to be something that you are not, but do you want to have to keep up that act for the rest of the relationship? Believe me there are plenty of women out there that will be attracted to you how you are, awkwardness and all.

 

[lgtrmusr]

What @nailz said...

 

[sangheili90]

This isn't the first time I've seen you say you are introverted, awkward, socially inept, etc. I think you're using it as an excuse.

Everyone has awkward moments, everyone fears rejection/embarrassment, and I don't think it's really easy for anyone to open up to another person, to take a risk and express their feelings. If it is easy for someone then I'd suspect they weren't genuine.

You're intelligent and don't seem to be lacking in self-confidence. But you seem to be looking for this perfect player delivery, the perfect approach. It's like you think you need to be super experienced and never show a hint of nervousness or awkwardness in order to attract a woman
Personally I find it repulsive when someone too smooth hits on me, all I can think about is how many other women he's said the same things to.

You're being silly. For every woman that will reject you for being awkward there are two that will find your vulnerability charming and adorable Have you ever even tried the 'maybe a little awkward but genuine' approach? What do you have to lose? Really?

The perfect partner accepts you for how you are. You can train yourself to be something that you are not, but do you want to have to keep up that act for the rest of the relationship? Believe me there are plenty of women out there that will be attracted to you how you are, awkwardness and all.

My major issue is that I am 26 and have no experience with women at all and I am sure this will become very obvious in a short period of time. I feel like this would be a major turn off for most young women in today's society, as they would think there is something wrong with me, I don't rationally believe that this is fact but I do see the logic in it........A good looking 26 year old male who has no experience with women is going to raise some flags, I may be wrong with this though.

However, I don't want to change who or what I am because I have a lot to offer. I have many strengths, being charismatic and successful with women is clearly not one of them at all and I feel like I miss out big time because of this.

My biggest issue is that every encounter I have had with the opposite sex, in regards to approaching them out of interest, has always been a humiliating or emotionally painful experience. I didn't even approach a girl until I was a bit shy of 20, it was at a local community college in MA, where I am originally from. I made a complete idiot of myself, which really isn't a big deal, but what happened was she went out of her way to humiliate me and the rest of the semester people would talk shit about me, refuse to talk to me at all.......I would list this as the most embarrassing and insulting thing I have ever gone through. After that I had a couple other experiences where girls would laugh at my awkwardness. I've been screamed at for approaching a girl in public, and this was at a university I was going to. I've tried online dating sites and the results were the same. At this point it is almost like I expect to be disrespected for approaching women by being who I am, so I assume they were looking for this perfect approach and that being me is not good enough.

 

[sangheili90]

This isn't the first time I've seen you say you are introverted, awkward, socially inept, etc. I think you're using it as an excuse.

Everyone has awkward moments, everyone fears rejection/embarrassment, and I don't think it's really easy for anyone to open up to another person, to take a risk and express their feelings. If it is easy for someone then I'd suspect they weren't genuine.

You're intelligent and don't seem to be lacking in self-confidence. But you seem to be looking for this perfect player delivery, the perfect approach. It's like you think you need to be super experienced and never show a hint of nervousness or awkwardness in order to attract a woman
Personally I find it repulsive when someone too smooth hits on me, all I can think about is how many other women he's said the same things to.

You're being silly. For every woman that will reject you for being awkward there are two that will find your vulnerability charming and adorable Have you ever even tried the 'maybe a little awkward but genuine' approach? What do you have to lose? Really?

The perfect partner accepts you for how you are. You can train yourself to be something that you are not, but do you want to have to keep up that act for the rest of the relationship? Believe me there are plenty of women out there that will be attracted to you how you are, awkwardness and all.

So, based on my experiences I came to the conclusion that women expect a guy to be very experienced with women and that anything that hinted at me being the opposite would never be good enough.

 

[lgtrmusr]

So, based on my experiences I came to the conclusion that women expect a guy to be very experienced with women and that anything that hinted at me being the opposite would never be good enough.

Not sure @sangheili90, that youve got what women are looking for exactly right. My sense is that girls expect 1) the you are genuinely interested in them and 2) are honest, reliable, and reasonably open about yourself.

You say you've lots to offer. So how might you present these traits? Perhaps you;d like to list the three things that are most attractive about you, and no more than three things you feel are unattractive. Then consider how you'd take advantage of your assets when meeting someone new.

 

[Uncutpete]

So look. I believe that you really are introverted, and shy. The problem with most shy people like you is that they are so ashamed of themselves that they keep trying to pretend that they can just change and be like more extroverted people. You are going to have to learn to build up your extrovert side, it's there. It's just scared and weak. It needs exercise.

The lab table is a very easy ice-breaker. Try something like, "hey, I'm very shy, you might have figured out, so its tough to make small talk, but I'd like to get to know you. How about coffee sometime this week?" All she can say is no. How bad is that, since she is going to act no until you try? If she does say no, you will take a step toward realizing that the world does not end if a girl refuses you, and you will then be more likely to try again with someone else... or even her. Don't make a pest of yourself, but she might take a few times asking her.

 

[Lord_of_Goon]

Hey guys,

So I'm going to college full time this semester and have been having a great time so far lol. In one of my classes, A+P 1, I've been sporadically talking to this really cute girl who sits next to me, who is also my lab partner. Anyway, on Thursday towards the end of the class I noticed that she was looking at something in my direction, so naturally I looked to see what she was glancing at and noticed that I had my bulge action going on, like the one I have on my profile. From then on she would glance at it for a few seconds and then look back towards the front of the room, this went off and on many times over the next 15 minutes or so. I was sitting back in my chair, sort of reclined a bit, so it was really obvious to me what she was actually staring at. However, I didn't make it awkward by making it obvious to her that I noticed she was looking or say anything about it to he after class.

So, what exactly should I do at this point? Just continue talking to her and just pretend it didn't happen or not?

Don't say anything directly about it. Next time u catch her looking then go for a grab and shift it around for her

 

[sangheili90]

Not sure @sangheili90, that youve got what women are looking for exactly right. My sense is that girls expect 1) the you are genuinely interested in them and 2) are honest, reliable, and reasonably open about yourself.

You say you've lots to offer. So how might you present these traits? Perhaps you;d like to list the three things that are most attractive about you, and no more than three things you feel are unattractive. Then consider how you'd take advantage of your assets when meeting someone new.

I'll give this a go,

Positive/attractive traits/things I have going for me
- Pretty much financially set for life and don't really have to worry about career, I can focus my time on things that I actually enjoy doing, from hobbies to business concepts.
- Supportive, unless I feel someone is a complete jackass, I am do a lot to help other people....maybe too much.
- Large variety of interests and open to new things, I just need to be with someone who is a bit more spontaneous.

Negatives
- A bit pessimistic about how things will work out for me
- Don't have much in common with other people and because of this a bit awkward around them, seen as strange etc.
- I'm a loner, most women will see this as a sign that I am of lower social value and see me as less attractive.

 

[sangheili90]

So look. I believe that you really are introverted, and shy. The problem with most shy people like you is that they are so ashamed of themselves that they keep trying to pretend that they can just change and be like more extroverted people. You are going to have to learn to build up your extrovert side, it's there. It's just scared and weak. It needs exercise.

The lab table is a very easy ice-breaker. Try something like, "hey, I'm very shy, you might have figured out, so its tough to make small talk, but I'd like to get to know you. How about coffee sometime this week?" All she can say is no. How bad is that, since she is going to act no until you try? If she does say no, you will take a step toward realizing that the world does not end if a girl refuses you, and you will then be more likely to try again with someone else... or even her. Don't make a pest of yourself, but she might take a few times asking her.

That's what I want to do but I don't know how to do it without making it awkward or forced. Does it matter if I haven't made a move by this point?

 

[sangheili90]

Don't say anything directly about it. Next time u catch her looking then go for a grab and shift it around for her

LMFAO If I did this I'd pop a massive boner and I don't know what would happen after that lol.

 

[Lord_of_Goon]

LMFAO If I did this I'd pop a massive boner and I don't know what would happen after that lol.

Dude. I pop boners all over the place in public. U can hide a chub yet play with it still

 

[sangheili90]

Dude. I pop boners all over the place in public. U can hide a chub yet play with it still

You must not have seen the pictures I have on my profile, if I get a hard on in public people are definitely going to notice lol. This happened once many years ago and a girl was starting at it hard lol, no pun intended.

 

[nailz]

My major issue is that I am 26 and have no experience with women at all and I am sure this will become very obvious in a short period of time. I feel like this would be a major turn off for most young women in today's society, as they would think there is something wrong with me.

If this is really an issue with the crowd you hang around with then you should consider dating people from a different pool.

It sounds like your first experience at this was a real nightmare Only a small minority of people are like that. Decent people would consider the fact that you are 26 and inexperienced a positive thing, not something to humiliate you over.

Just a suggestion: have you considered dating older women? I have older friends (mid-late 30s) that would be all over you in a heartbeat lol, and they'd consider the fact that you are totally inexperienced as adorable and a challenge. Someone in that age group would be much less likely to humiliate/insult/embarrass you intentionally, play mind games, or waste your time.
Seriously just go out and find someone 10-15 years older than yourself and have some fun. It would get you over this whole shyness with women/inexperienced thing.

Dude. I pop boners all over the place in public. U can hide a chub yet play with it still

Oh god please don't take any of the typical LPSG-er advice and proudly display a huge erection or an exposed nutsack while staring into her eyes. This might seem OK on LPSG but in the real world this will get you pepper sprayed and/or arrested

 

[sangheili90]

If this is really an issue with the crowd you hang around with then you should consider dating people from a different pool.

It sounds like your first experience at this was a real nightmare Only a small minority of people are like that. Decent people would consider the fact that you are 26 and inexperienced a positive thing, not something to humiliate you over.

Just a suggestion: have you considered dating older women? I have older friends (mid-late 30s) that would be all over you in a heartbeat lol, and they'd consider the fact that you are totally inexperienced as adorable and a challenge. Someone in that age group would be much less likely to humiliate/insult/embarrass you intentionally, play mind games, or waste your time.
Seriously just go out and find someone 10-15 years older than yourself and have some fun. It would get you over this whole shyness with women/inexperienced thing.



Oh god please don't take any of the typical LPSG-er advice and proudly display a huge erection or an exposed nutsack while staring into her eyes. This might seem OK on LPSG but in the real world this will get you pepper sprayed and/or arrested

Most of this stuff happened in MA when I was between 20 and 22, none of these negative experiences have happened out here, with the exception of the online dating sites. I used plenty of fish, POF, and just dealt with a bunch of weird immature nonsense on there, it was really annoying to say the least lol.

I've never really considered it but I'd be open to the idea, though I'm not exactly sure how I would go about finding that lol. Honestly though, I'm primarily interested in being with someone younger than me as I'd like to start a large family later in my life. I live in the perfect place for that as there is a very large Mexican population here and many of the young women grew up in households where more traditional values and beliefs are held.

 

[sangheili90]

Oh god please don't take any of the typical LPSG-er advice and proudly display a huge erection or an exposed nutsack while staring into her eyes. This might seem OK on LPSG but in the real world this will get you pepper sprayed and/or arrested

LOL There are a lot of weirdos on here, I'll send you a link to something you'll find entertaining.

 

[palakaorion]

none of these negative experiences have happened out here, with the exception of the online dating sites. I used plenty of fish, POF, and just dealt with a bunch of weird immature nonsense on there, it was really annoying to say the least lol.

AFAIK "dating sites" fall into at least two categories: relationship sites (Match etc.) and hookup brokers (Tinder etc.) Some may be somewhere in between. Know which you're dealing with.

Someone just looking for a hookup likely won't want to be bothered with an inexperienced partner (unless that's their kink). From your comments it sounds like you're more interested in a relationship.