thanks i guess i will read some stuff on it an experiment a little i hope i dont fuck up
Relax, DSCH. There's no way to "fuck it up." If you're into giving it, and she's into getting it, you've succeeded before you even start. Ask her to give you feedback on what feels good to her, and what feels great. It's not a bad idea to learn from web sites (or an instructional video or two), but as SassySpy said, every woman is different. No question. I think I've said before that the best thing is to know about a variety of techniques, and try various combinations as you find out what she likes.
Also be aware that some sensations are very pleasurable but not likely to lead to orgasm, whereas others are both. Even if she doesn't come quickly or at all, it doesn't mean you're not giving her pleasure.
My preference would be for a man to have the patience to pleasure me a bit without worrying so much about orgasm, and then "go in for the kill" -- in my case this would be firm, up-and-down licks directly on the glans of the clitoris, whereas in SS's case it's closing the mouth around the clit and gently sucking. I like that (oh God, do I ever), but it won't make me come.
The thing is to keep an open mind, and realize there's no "wrong" way to do it. Approach it with the attitude of having fun and making her feel good, whether she comes or not. This may actually take some pressure off of her, as well.
In the past I've felt pressure to orgasm during cunnelingus, just because I knew my partner was engaged in a "selfless" activity and I wanted him to believe he had "succeeded."
Now I understand that the majority of men (at least the ones I've spoken to or been with) enjoy going down on a woman in and of itself, so it's not as if he's being tortured against his will. And not just in oral, but in sex in general, I believe "success" lies much more in the journey than the destination. Arriving at a mind-blowing orgasm is great, of course, but if you've made her feel amazing, delicious sensations orally, but she didn't come until you fucked her, you've still had fabulous sex.
I certainly wouldn't complain. :wink: