I can only agree with you.in the beginning i was so intimidated by the thought of my bf's penis in my assbut he would take his time to get me all worked up, give me a few orgasms first, and then use a ton of lube and slowly push it in while it was semi-erect (and then swell to his full size once he was in me). it felt fantastic, there was absolutely no pain. lately its much easier. despite frequent anal my butt is tighter than ever, but i can totally relax and take it fully erect without so much preparation. practice makes perfect
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anal isn't rocket science
for the person doing the fucking, its all about patience and preparation. lots of foreplay (orgasms really help loosen you up) and lots of good quality lube. for the person getting fucked, its mostly just psychological: relaxing, loosening up and getting over the intimidation.
i don't know about the alcohol thing.. it might help you relax, but most of the stories i hear involving alcohol+sex are pretty negative experiences.
But being you an expert, given the caliber you take, I recommend all the beginners taking your advice very seriously.
Thanks for it