how would you feel about being a housewife?

[helgaleena]

My ideal would be rich enough for Both parents to stay at home with the kids. It's terrible enough when one of them has to have a job. Too many people are having children who can't afford them, or find out too late that they can't. Children are expensive.

 

[dolfette]

My ideal would be rich enough for Both parents to stay at home with the kids. It's terrible enough when one of them has to have a job. Too many people are having children who can't afford them, or find out too late that they can't. Children are expensive.

would that give the kids unrealistic expectations of life?

i'm of the opinion that a parent who works hard & takes pride in their job provides a good role model...as long as they still have time for the family. that way children learn that life is expensive, that if you want more you work harder.

hmmm...

 

[cock23]

would that give the kids unrealistic expectations of life?

i'm of the opinion that a parent who works hard & takes pride in their job provides a good role model...as long as they still have time for the family. that way children learn that life is expensive, that if you want more you work harder.

hmmm...

I agree when you say that helgaleena's expressing an unrealistic expectation of life. The only families which feature both parents staying at home full time are the British and European noble families which have kids who are born into a ridicilous amount of wealth and therefore don't have to do very much aside from manage the family estate. Every other family (even celeb families) have at least one parent who goes to work.

And I completely agree that it's good for kids to have a parent who works as that gives them a good role model in life: my mum has always been a role model for me in that respect, because she has two degrees and is a manager so from an early age I've always looked up to her and wanted to have the same level of success.

 

[MrsSmallLovesBig]

Absolutely. In fact we are saving part of our combined income towards a "parent fund" that we intend to draw upon once we have a child and I quit my job to be a full time stay at home mom. No day care worker can give my child/ren the kind of love and attention that I can.

 

[whatireallywant]

wow!
i know what you mean about it being thrust down your throat though. i'm making sure my girlbelieves she can do anything and my boy knows how to cook for himself...it's just as unfair to never teach a boy the basics of house keeping.

True... Unfortunately, I was also criticized for everything I did, even down to the way I walk and the way I talk. So I grew up thinking I was useless at everything except book-learning. (And the teachers even thought my ability at that was just overcompensation for my lack of ability at everything else!) So I grew up having very few skills, which is biting me back now because I have trouble keeping a job, despite really, really wanting to keep it and do well.

I knew a lot of parents who wouldn't allow their boys to learn to cook or clean house! I kid you not! That was "women's work", so only women and girls did that. UGH!!! That's why I got a little anti-staying-at-home growing up. I'm not as much now - more "to each their own" - as a result of the illness I had in 2003. It made me change perspectives on a few things. But I personally still wish I had the skills/ability to do well at a job, and my career interests have always been in traditionally male fields at that. (I work in the IT field, but have also been interested in sciences, engineering and electrician work - although I didn't develop the skills needed to do any of these kinds of jobs. I can do entry-level IT work but mostly people are only hiring for senior-level.)

I think that both boys and girls should grow up learning both sets of skills. Unfortunately, I learned neither set. I was stubborn about not wanting to learn the traditional female stuff, and wasn't allowed to learn the traditional male stuff (actually, my parents would've been ok with it except that my dad could get gruff with me when I didn't do it perfectly right away, so I pretty much gave up because I don't deal well with people getting gruff with me.) I think if I could've learned the things that interested me, without gruffness from home, or in the case of school, etc., not being allowed - I would've been more open to learning to cook and clean. Well, I CAN clean house, I just don't want to! :biggrin1:

 

[D_Ivana Dickenside]

Too many people are having children who can't afford them, or find out too late that they can't. Children are expensive.

ohhh, you must know my sister :tongue:

 

[Not_Punny]

I was a housewife for, oh, about 6 months. Couldn't take it. Guess I an over achiever.

 

[ManlyBanisters]

I was a housewife for, oh, about 6 months. Couldn't take it. Guess I an over achiever.

overachieve
To perform better or achieve more success than expected.

overachiever
one who achieves success over and above the standard or expected level especially at an early age


I'm a little confused as to what that says about your opinion of stay-at-home parents.

 

[Trouty]

I am a housewife. Or rather I was - but now my husband is no longer here.

I guess that makes me a house :biggrin:

LOL. This made me laugh and brightened an otherwise dull day for me :biggrin1:

 

[helgaleena]

I agree when you say that helgaleena's expressing an unrealistic expectation of life. The only families which feature both parents staying at home full time are the British and European noble families which have kids who are born into a ridicilous amount of wealth and therefore don't have to do very much aside from manage the family estate. Every other family (even celeb families) have at least one parent who goes to work.

And I completely agree that it's good for kids to have a parent who works as that gives them a good role model in life: my mum has always been a role model for me in that respect, because she has two degrees and is a manager so from an early age I've always looked up to her and wanted to have the same level of success.

All right, I will change my ideal: I will have a man's children if he is willing to stay at home and care for them full-time so that I can get on with my career. Which does not pay well at all. So he had better have his own income!

But luckily for me I am no longer of childbearing age, so if I were to find I could not do without a man who has children, I would not reject him for having them and would treat them with courtesy.

If this sounds suspiciously sexist, it is. I never planned to be a parent and have always felt I was tricked into it. Not that I do not love my children-- instinct leads me to believe they are the salvation of the planet and of more importance than any other children I know, but it was not what I wanted to do with my life.

 

[dolfette]

If this sounds suspiciously sexist, it is. I never planned to be a parent and have always felt I was tricked into it. Not that I do not love my children-- instinct leads me to believe they are the salvation of the planet and of more importance than any other children I know, but it was not what I wanted to do with my life.

mine weren't planned either. i had other ideas for where to go with my life. i do sometimes wonder where i'd be if i haden't gone down that road but don't regret it.

 

[helgaleena]

Oh, the things we do for our children that we would never do for some other kid!

 

[freyasworld]

I Don't know if I am lucky or not but hell it's so damn boring!

I have not worked for 15 years, I have a husband who works and provides for us all, I have 3 kids, lived overseas for 8 years so could not work. Then I got breast cancer and for the past 5 years fighting that disease.

Now I am looking to get back to work full time, 2 kids off to university and 1 going in 2 years time.

I do feel though that I have missed out, if it weren't for the gym and my videos, I think I'd have gone insane! Oh and for the record, can't cook won't cook, can use a vacuum cleaner either! Can't and won't go shopping.....that's what husbands and kids are for!

 

[dolfette]

Oh and for the record, can't cook won't cook, can use a vacuum cleaner either! Can't and won't go shopping.....that's what husbands and kids are for!

was that a joke?

 

[freyasworld]

No!

 

[dolfette]

no wonder you're bored!

 

[Serial Kisser]

I'm with Kat on this one.

I don't want kids, ever.

To be a stay at home mom would kill my entire lively hood.

No way.

 

[3664shaken]

#1 Define Housewife

If 'wife' means being married, then the answer is no.

If 'housewife' means being a partner in an open relationship with a totally hot guy and living together for eternity than I could be open to that.

would it suit you, if finances allowed?

LMAO - If a guy made as much money as I do and wanted to take care of me - HELL YEAH!!!!

would it affect your self esteem?

Probably, I would lose some confidence in women being the savior for the human race and gain some that there might be a real man out there.

would you feel it a betrayal of feminism?

HUH - don't even know what this means, would it betray me to be a woman and allow a REAL man to be a man. NO I cherish that ideal.

or do you think it's an important role?

It's a very important role that men have shucked, especially since radical feminism has come and liberated them from being in their traditional roles.

 

[Tattooed Goddess]

I wanted to be a mom as soon as i became a wife. I didnt want kids before that. I was practically an only child and didnt like a lot of noise and had never changed a diaper until i was a mom. I had a lot of time to think about what i wanted because we had several years of infertility treatments.

Given the difficulties of trying to get pregnant, staying pregnant and birthing and complications there after added to having a special needs child.....well one kid is enough and even though im not a fertile person, i still work very hard at not getting pregnant ever again.

I like being someones wife, i like being someones mom and i dont regret staying home with my daughter most of her life in the last almost 8 years. But many days it wasnt fun, not anywhere near easy and sometimes i went completely nuts. But i know shes a better kid for not being raised in daycare given how particular she is about everything and i seem to understand her best.

I work a little these days and not as much as i used to and during the summer im able to take her to work with me. Even though my mom was mostly crazy my entire childhood, i still prefered the comfort of my own home and knowing that my mom was in the other room watching soap operas if i electricuted myself (true story actually)

Just ask yourself, would you want to be raised by someone else most of the day if you were your kids? im sure some days my kid would say yes, but i think she will appreciate it later that i cared to be in her presence even if she drove me nuts sometimes.

 

[badgirl22]

I was a stay at home mom. I have an advanced degree and had a great career in high tech. Then I gave birth to three kids in less than 13 months. Life changed dramatically. I made more money than my husband so our income was cut in more than half. My brain became mushy. But, I loved it - still do. Hate the cleaning part - I sort of suck at that. My self esteem didn't really sufffer but I did miss the adult interaction and work related discussions. I just made sure to build myself a big social circle with intelligent women. I live in a town where the majority of women are stay at home moms and most were quite successful professoinals in their *old* lives.

I think bening housewife is a hard job and way under appreciated. It's also a very important job. I don't judge any woman for the choice she makes regarding staying at home or working - everyone's situations are different and they do the best they can.

When my kids went to school, I decided to start my own business so I could dictate my own schedule and be there for my kids when they weren't in school. Sort of like having the best of both worlds. It would be great if more companies and businesses did job shares or flexible/shorter hours so woman could still contribute in the work force, earn a bit of money, but still be there for their school age children.

On a side note...I think the MOST important years to be home with your children are their teen years, not the younger ones. JMHO