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I wouldn't say I came out to anyone, seeing as I've never really been "in a closet". (It's not as though I tell people I'm pansexual from the get-go, but if anyone directly asks me about my sexuality, I tell them honestly and earnestly that I am pansexual.) When I was younger I thought that my attraction to both genders made me bisexual (didn't really understand my infatuations at the time). There was a straight friend of mine who found himself the first person to whom I was ever both emotionally AND physically attracted. Let's call him Crush.
As I said I was never one for closets, but my sexuality, while widely regarded as an interesting topic for hushed discussion--you remember how high school was--by many people, it was not something about which anyone confronted him. Until Crush, that is.
I know for a fact that another friend of mine told Crush about my sexuality and my attraction to him. (I knew it then because he was the only one I'd ever actually told at the time, and Crush confirmed it years later.) I remember the incident very clearly, and all though it's a bit messed up if I think about it too hard, I find it kind of funny.
Crush and I shared one class, a period devoted to reading and study called Seminar at the end of the day. I was sitting, reading, minding my own business. Suddenly, Crush is sitting next to me and he says quietly, "Hey, can we talk?"
"Sure," I replied.
"Triasco (not using my real name)... I know," he said. That's all he said. Then he simply looked at me. Now, I'm no mindreader and I haven't been a genius for the longest time, but I knew immediately what he was talking about. But, for some reason, I found the idea of him knowing I liked him embarrassing, so I witheld any reaction and just tried to run some damage control.
"Know what?" I asked, innocently.
His brow furrowed a bit, but he relaxed soon, throwing an arm around my shoulder before replying, even quieter, "I know about you."
Well, damn, I thought. Cat's out of the bag. Still... "What about me?"
His patience seemingly worn thin, he all but shouts, "I know you have a crush on me."
To this day I'm still amazed that no one heard him, and it now strikes me as hilarious that he was bold enough to bring it up and tell me that he thought it was okay, but at the time it scared and mortified me to no end.
I don't think it did too much to our relationship. I mean, I feel as though there were times he flaunted my affection for him to others as though it were a sort of trophy (there were times when he actually introduced me by saying, "This is Triasco. He's bi and has a crush on me."), but there are certain things that were going on at the time that make me understand why he would do those things. Right now, we definitely are best friends, and we joke about quite a few things in regards to our sexualities and views on sex and what not.
Oh wow... this post became much longer than I thought it would be.
As I said I was never one for closets, but my sexuality, while widely regarded as an interesting topic for hushed discussion--you remember how high school was--by many people, it was not something about which anyone confronted him. Until Crush, that is.
I know for a fact that another friend of mine told Crush about my sexuality and my attraction to him. (I knew it then because he was the only one I'd ever actually told at the time, and Crush confirmed it years later.) I remember the incident very clearly, and all though it's a bit messed up if I think about it too hard, I find it kind of funny.
Crush and I shared one class, a period devoted to reading and study called Seminar at the end of the day. I was sitting, reading, minding my own business. Suddenly, Crush is sitting next to me and he says quietly, "Hey, can we talk?"
"Sure," I replied.
"Triasco (not using my real name)... I know," he said. That's all he said. Then he simply looked at me. Now, I'm no mindreader and I haven't been a genius for the longest time, but I knew immediately what he was talking about. But, for some reason, I found the idea of him knowing I liked him embarrassing, so I witheld any reaction and just tried to run some damage control.
"Know what?" I asked, innocently.
His brow furrowed a bit, but he relaxed soon, throwing an arm around my shoulder before replying, even quieter, "I know about you."
Well, damn, I thought. Cat's out of the bag. Still... "What about me?"
His patience seemingly worn thin, he all but shouts, "I know you have a crush on me."
To this day I'm still amazed that no one heard him, and it now strikes me as hilarious that he was bold enough to bring it up and tell me that he thought it was okay, but at the time it scared and mortified me to no end.
I don't think it did too much to our relationship. I mean, I feel as though there were times he flaunted my affection for him to others as though it were a sort of trophy (there were times when he actually introduced me by saying, "This is Triasco. He's bi and has a crush on me."), but there are certain things that were going on at the time that make me understand why he would do those things. Right now, we definitely are best friends, and we joke about quite a few things in regards to our sexualities and views on sex and what not.
Oh wow... this post became much longer than I thought it would be.