Hurt a girl

[ShannonH]

I'll probably get a few guys chuckling over this one and call me a girlie man, but due to a very bad experience from a previous relationship, if I even get an inkling I'm hurting my wife, I go limp -- no matter how hard I was.

You're definitely not a girlie man. It's strange but for some reason men think something that kills the mood for them means they've failed somehow. When a women loses interest or things start to feel bad for her, she can be upfront about it (or if she's dishonest, fake an orgasm..), but if something kills it for a man we're like "must... maintain.... erection...."

I had a similar bad experience just a few years ago and it took months before I felt safe enough that the slightest concern didn't send me in to a panic.

 

[petite]

RawDog, you aren't alone. The worst time it actually felt like I had been stabbed with a knife and it made me cry. He felt so bad that he just wanted to hold me, so we laid down and he wrapped his arms around me really sweetly. He felt so bad about it. I felt bad that he felt so bad so I wanted to try again so that maybe we could salvage the rest of the night and put that behind us, but he didn't want to any more. He just wanted to hold me and kiss my face. It didn't even occur to me that maybe he couldn't have sex after that because he had lost his erection until you suggested it and I asked him. He was extremely slow and careful after that for a long time, so much more than I thought he needed to be, but it really did freak him out so much that it was really obvious that he was afraid of hurting me every single time we had sex for months.

 

[Wrat]

I've been asked to "ram it in" before, by a very small woman. I've been told that it hurt like hell, and that she was trying to see how much pain she could take. I've been told that it hurts, but that it was good. But these partners were willing, and enjoyed a little pain (for whatever reason). Deliberately injuring them was the last thing on either of our minds.

 

[alx]

Yes a number of times. A lot of people get off on pain and pleasure. I guess its a turn on for me on many levels. I like to take much more than I give out. As long as you are in a relationship where both parties are comfortable with each other and trust each other I see no issues.

Going around and just ramming the fuck outta people with the intention of just causing physical damage that's when it becomes an issue.

Think people are going a bit over the top with saying if you enjoy 'x' then you are somehow in the wrong. Ok the op dug himself into an unhealthy hole but his original post had value I think.

 

[D_Jacqueline_Boozann]

I don't like pain. Fortunately, since I'm over 50, mature, and experienced, my men work with me. I tell them from the onset, I don't like pain. However, I usually deal with the 45-55 crowd, anyway.

Since I'm so small in the vaginal area (quarter-sized), men are very reluctant to ram their cocks deep; afraid of hurting me. Oftentimes, they asked me, intermittedly, am I hurting you. I tell them, yes or no, depending upon how deep their thrusts are...how much they weigh (I love missionary and big men: the largest, 245).

Finally, women, young and older, let your concerns and voices be heard...if, not, you may find a man who will bottom you out, viciously. Better yet, find a man with experience: who loves/adores women and has your best interest at heart.

Episcopalian (Denise), Albuquerque, NM.

 

[hud01]

Again, you're all overreacting. I didn't say a girl being a tramp is a bad thing. There's nothing wrong with a gal being a tramp. I'm not a moralist. What people do is their business, and tramps are a valuable part of the community and always good to have around.

And vaginas over time get stretched with a lot of activity. Older women that have been around almost have more spacious pussies, in my experience, just as the girls I had in high school were tighter than the pages in a book. I actually like spacious pussies, because there's less pain for her and it's easier for me to fuck.

Tramp by definition is a negative word about women and has been for as long as I have known about it being used in that way. You could have used a more positive word and said she was experienced.

 

[rawbone8]

I really like vigorous sex when it's possible, but I learned much about the unforeseen rewards of restricted movement when I met a lover with a "tilted" uterus. She could only handle certain kinds of intercourse without pain. Radically gentle sex was required. It challenged me with the opportunity to become a better lover having to adapt to her conditions, with more subtle and sensual movements being the result. I've had comments from subsequent lovers about feeling more connection based on how they really felt parts of their vagina being stimulated. I also get a huge reward by edging and building my own extended orgasm.

Rawdog knows a lot about this, as can be seen in his many posts.

Win Win Win.

 

[dolfette]

great. now i'm horny.
arsehole.

 

[715636]

yep, ruins the mood for me sometimes lol .. don't hurt a girl during sex intentionally it just cant be helped mainly on penetration .. id rather take the pain myself tbh!

 

[rawbone8]

great. now i'm horny.
arsehole.

I thought you didn't like bumsex????

 

[dolfette]

I thought you didn't like bumsex????

 

[rawbone8]

I thought you didn't like bumsex????

You look enough to hurt a boy.

 

[dolfette]

You look enough to hurt a boy.

what should i break, heart or legs?

 

[rawbone8]

what should i break, heart or legs?

Legs heal. I'll go for the courageous choice.

 

[Drifterwood]

what should i break, heart or legs?

How about the habit of a lifetime? :tongue:

 

[rawbone8]

How about the habit of a lifetime? :tongue:

Wow. Drifterwood offers giving up being single?

 

[B_625girth]

I have had a few gals struggle with my 6.5" girth, but most on initial entry. once we get going we're fine. i did have one gf who struggled immensely, it took 10 minutes to get all the way in. she was on top. once I was totally in she was afraid to move. it took a few weeks to get comfortable, but eventually she loved it. I was her 2nd lover. she said she did know cocks came as big as mine, and she admitted she kinda freaked out and was scared. it didn't last forever, we broke up. but what did last, was her need for a fat cock. she told me I became the standard she compared other men. at one point, she said I had ruined her. this was after she met some guy she was just sure was Mr Right. I guess, the first time they had sex. he pulled his pants down, and she started laughing, got out of bed and said "why bother". got dressed and left.

 

[ShannonH]

I have had a few gals struggle with my 6.5" girth, but most on initial entry. once we get going we're fine. i did have one gf who struggled immensely, it took 10 minutes to get all the way in. she was on top. once I was totally in she was afraid to move. it took a few weeks to get comfortable, but eventually she loved it. I was her 2nd lover. she said she did know cocks came as big as mine, and she admitted she kinda freaked out and was scared. it didn't last forever, we broke up. but what did last, was her need for a fat cock. she told me I became the standard she compared other men. at one point, she said I had ruined her. this was after she met some guy she was just sure was Mr Right. I guess, the first time they had sex. he pulled his pants down, and she started laughing, got out of bed and said "why bother". got dressed and left.

Sounds like you don't need a woman around to stroke your ego anymore.. you're doing a great job stroking yourself.

 

[NC_BBC]

Yeah plenty of times... Takes women some getting used to. But like anything else dealing with sex, take it easy and COMMUNICATE what's going on and it always pans out great. Never been with anyone who could (over time) get used to and enjoy my size. Just MHO...

 

[twoton]

As my wife has a gyno condition (I mentioned at length in another thread), sex is very painful for her every time we do it.

There's nothing attractive about it, and we only have intercourse when she feels up to the challenge.

On the other hand, I had a g.f. who said, "You know it was good sex when you're sore the next day."