Husbands create 7 hours of extra housework a week

Mandee

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You got one in the oven? :biggrin1:

lol... noooo I'm not pregnant (I would like a baby, but not until I'm married).

I love baking... and cooking (but I will admit my cooking isn't really very creative, but I DO know how to follow a recipe).
 

Phil Ayesho

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Every woman I know works full time. The married ones work full time, meaning 40-80 hour weeks, plus commuting, taking care of the kids, and doing housework. This is not a rarity.

Government statistics still show that even full time working women who are married, work fewer hours, opt for less demanding positions, and are more likely to interrupt their career.

The key is that they place more emphasis on the family than the husbands do... ( or, rather... place emphasis on being the one to do the family stuff... because they are genetically driven in that regard)

Yes... especially in Europe and Asia. I know a German woman who tells me she grew up hating the "ugly Americans" but then she met and fell in love with an American man... moved to America and met lots of other americans over the years and had an epiphany...

She says American men are the best men on earth because they treat their women like gold... and that American women are the worst because they treat their men like shit.
She told me that Its the behavior of the WOMEN who make Americans look ugly abroad.


I don't care about the toilet seat at their house. But in my house, if you use my bathroom, put down the fucking toilet seat. I consider it a common courtesy and haven't been disappointed by anyone yet. :wink:

Ah, yes... such a male dominated world and yet you can be the dictator of other's actions...

Hey, I put the seat down... 99 times out of 100... but when I don't, what I hear is "you NEVER put the seat down!" Its that kind of absolutist accusations that make men just give up trying.

I can deal with doing my best to be courteous...
I can't deal with the anger and rage many women express when others don't toe their line.

American women demand courtesy of everyone except themselves... to their husbands... they are often cruel, belittling, harsh and demanding.


The American husband of my German friend, who has been married four times, told me that, he hopes this marriage lasts, that he's never been happier...... but that if it should fall apart for any reason he can assure me that, Having been with a European woman... he would never ever ever again, as long as he lived, fuck another American woman.
 

D_Fiona_Farvel

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Government statistics still show that even full time working women who are married, work fewer hours, opt for less demanding positions, and are more likely to interrupt their career.

The key is that they place more emphasis on the family than the husbands do... ( or, rather... place emphasis on being the one to do the family stuff... because they are genetically driven in that regard)
Again, the women I know, hell, even for my Mom, this is not true. They hold positions of authority that are very demanding and still care for children and their households. You are not citing the studies, but I think many might need a refresh reflecting today's economy and covering all classes and economic levels. Some women never have the luxury of working fewer hours, taking a less demanding, usually lower paying, position, or take a leave of absence.

Yes... especially in Europe and Asia. I know a German woman who tells me she grew up hating the "ugly Americans" but then she met and fell in love with an American man... moved to America and met lots of other americans over the years and had an epiphany...

She says American men are the best men on earth because they treat their women like gold... and that American women are the worst because they treat their men like shit.
She told me that Its the behavior of the WOMEN who make Americans look ugly abroad.
So, one woman? That makes sense and is much less broad.

Ah, yes... such a male dominated world and yet you can be the dictator of other's actions...

Hey, I put the seat down... 99 times out of 100... but when I don't, what I hear is "you NEVER put the seat down!" Its that kind of absolutist accusations that make men just give up trying.

I can deal with doing my best to be courteous...
I can't deal with the anger and rage many women express when others don't toe their line.

American women demand courtesy of everyone except themselves... to their husbands... they are often cruel, belittling, harsh and demanding.


The American husband of my German friend, who has been married four times, told me that, he hopes this marriage lasts, that he's never been happier...... but that if it should fall apart for any reason he can assure me that, Having been with a European woman... he would never ever ever again, as long as he lived, fuck another American woman.
Indeed, my home is a "insert my name" -ocracy. *I live alone*
However, I do not have anger and rage. I am very easy going, and when sharing a home with someone, they generally put down the seat. If it so happens it is left up, I have no problem putting it down without incident of further mention.

As far as the characterization of American women, I have family from several countries - and have found we're all bitches in some respect. People can be mean, shrill, angry, prone to complaining, whatever. This is not unique to American women, nor women in general.

Biggest bitch I know is a 70 year old male, who is a decorated military veteran and ex cop. He always gets his way, bitching and complaining as needed, and that's just the way it is. :yup:
 

snoozan

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Facts from actual research...

women in America work, during the course of their lives, far fewer hours than men... have far more leisure time than men, and have control over the majority of the spending.

Provide links to this research, and I'll show you ten more that say women in the US tend to do more than men and it's increasing every year.

She complained no end about how her "job" was 24 hours a day... yet she had no trouble keeping up with all the little intrigues on 3 soap operas... every show Oprah ever did... and still could not manage to cook a dinner more than 3 days a week... ( the rest was take out or frozen)

It's hard to get anything done in a day because every 5 minutes a child needs something at that moment. I've been home for 3 years. It's exhausting-- much moreso than when I worked full time and was in school full time. One of the reasons I post on LPSG a lot is because when I'm home I can read a thread, post on it, and then run off to the next thing I need to do for my son.

If I spend 2 hours cleaning the kitchen, for example, a lot of it is spent changing diapers, making a snack, making bottles, seeing what's going on when my son wants something, keeping an eye on him when he disappears, getting him out of the cleaning supplies, dragging him off the floor I just cleaned, getting him out of the bucket of ammonia and water, extracting him from dishwasher and putting the clean things he threw on the floor with the dirty dishes, trying to get the crayon out of his hand that he just found somewhere, wiping the crayon off of the walls, showing him how to put away his toys, etc. etc. etc. I worked for a guy who had no idea why his wife was so bedraggled at the end of the day when she was home with the baby and he wasn't when he was home. The difference was he'd leave the child in her high chair propped in front of the TV for 4 hours at a stretch and then throw her in her crib for a nap for another 3 hours and let her scream if she wasn't tired. Mom actually paid attention to the kid.

I don't think that a lot of people understand how hard it is when you have children who dictate every minute of your life for most of your day. I can't even go into the bathroom and take a shit for 5 minutes. It's mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausting. I don't get a lunchtime or a 15 minute break. I can't sit at my desk and take 10 minutes to gather my thoughts. One of the reasons I go to the gym a lot is because it's one place where I'm in control of my time and my body. I can listen to my iPod and no one bothers me while my son is in the babysitting room.

Women in America, by and large, get to have from men whatever they demand... but they want to reserve the right to bitch about it.

I'm sorry you think that, but it's simply not true. I've seen it both ways.

Government statistics still show that even full time working women who are married, work fewer hours, opt for less demanding positions, and are more likely to interrupt their career.

Is this because they really want to or is it because many men will not have children unless she makes that concession? Is it because women are expected to have the burden of childcare and housework to the point where it's never really a discussion with more couples-- it's assumed she'll care for the children and the home more than the man.

The key is that they place more emphasis on the family than the husbands do... ( or, rather... place emphasis on being the one to do the family stuff... because they are genetically driven in that regard)

It's not all genetics.

American women demand courtesy of everyone except themselves... to their husbands... they are often cruel, belittling, harsh and demanding.

And men are never like this?
 

RamIt

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Thats what we get for giving women the right to vote, now they think their opinions matter.
 

HaagenDazs

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LOL. When I get married I'm even lazier than the average husband. So that seven should be upped to 10.
 

whatireallywant

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Does anybody think one day we will grow out of all this Boys versus Girls crap?

in my life time, i hope that i'll live to see societies trash this type of mumbo-jumbo and both sexes can distrubute house work, and other types of work, equally.

I hope so! I would like to see this. My whole being would be much happier if this was the case.

LOL. When I get married I'm even lazier than the average husband. So that seven should be upped to 10.

Uh-oh... and here I thought I was in love. :biggrin1: Nope, I don't do housework. Especially if I'm the ONLY one to do it. I will split the cleaning if need be but I still hate it. I'd prefer to have a housekeeper, but you need money for that.
 

whatireallywant

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Provide links to this research, and I'll show you ten more that say women in the US tend to do more than men and it's increasing every year.



It's hard to get anything done in a day because every 5 minutes a child needs something at that moment. I've been home for 3 years. It's exhausting-- much moreso than when I worked full time and was in school full time. One of the reasons I post on LPSG a lot is because when I'm home I can read a thread, post on it, and then run off to the next thing I need to do for my son.

If I spend 2 hours cleaning the kitchen, for example, a lot of it is spent changing diapers, making a snack, making bottles, seeing what's going on when my son wants something, keeping an eye on him when he disappears, getting him out of the cleaning supplies, dragging him off the floor I just cleaned, getting him out of the bucket of ammonia and water, extracting him from dishwasher and putting the clean things he threw on the floor with the dirty dishes, trying to get the crayon out of his hand that he just found somewhere, wiping the crayon off of the walls, showing him how to put away his toys, etc. etc. etc. I worked for a guy who had no idea why his wife was so bedraggled at the end of the day when she was home with the baby and he wasn't when he was home. The difference was he'd leave the child in her high chair propped in front of the TV for 4 hours at a stretch and then throw her in her crib for a nap for another 3 hours and let her scream if she wasn't tired. Mom actually paid attention to the kid.

I don't think that a lot of people understand how hard it is when you have children who dictate every minute of your life for most of your day. I can't even go into the bathroom and take a shit for 5 minutes. It's mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausting. I don't get a lunchtime or a 15 minute break. I can't sit at my desk and take 10 minutes to gather my thoughts. One of the reasons I go to the gym a lot is because it's one place where I'm in control of my time and my body. I can listen to my iPod and no one bothers me while my son is in the babysitting room.

This is one of the main reasons I've never wanted children. I want my job to be 40 hours a week, NOT 24/7/365! I'm fine with people who want and have them, it just REALLY isn't for me!



Is this because they really want to or is it because many men will not have children unless she makes that concession? Is it because women are expected to have the burden of childcare and housework to the point where it's never really a discussion with more couples-- it's assumed she'll care for the children and the home more than the man.



It's not all genetics.

Very true... I believe that it is very little, if any. (Have a look at the links in my sig...)

Also, about working hours, demanding jobs, etc. I prefer to work a full time job. I have two jobs right now but one is very seasonal and the other is temp off-and-on projects. I look for full time steady work and have always wanted a career outside of the home.

And in fact, my career interests are in traditionally male fields of work as well. (I'm an IT professional - or trying to get back into it, that is.) As far as demanding jobs go, it depends. I have had trouble keeping a job so for now I feel a need to keep my sights low and the most important thing is to avoid being fired again. Then if I can do that, and have a steady job and build my skills further, then we can talk later about me going into a more demanding job. Right now I'm more in survival mode than career ambitious mode, unfortunately. If I can improve my skills and keep a job, then I can eventually get back into career ambitious mode.
 

Hippie Hollow Girl

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I haven't really ever noticed that my husband has ever created an extra 7 hours of housework for me. Now my kids and their friends and the pets.....they can keep me on my toes. And up grading to bigger houses that are not laid out very well (without hiring a cleaning service) that can add some extra hours to my house cleaning week.

I don't really like housework......but I am motivated to keep my house clean because I am a social creature and I like to entertain. It works for me.
 

Phil Ayesho

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Again, the women I know, hell, even for my Mom, this is not true. They hold positions of authority that are very demanding and still care for children and their households. You are not citing the studies, but I think many might need a refresh reflecting today's economy and covering all classes and economic levels. Some women never have the luxury of working fewer hours, taking a less demanding, usually lower paying, position, or take a leave of absence.
That is true... but it is also true that MORE women are opting to stay home when they can afford it.
There are books out there that will explain just how much money a woman has to earn to make it reasonable to work outside the home...

My wife stayed home and, after factoring all the costs of her working, we were only down a couple hundred bucks from when she made $30,000.


So, one woman? That makes sense and is much less broad.
Oh, no... far more than just one... she was simply the most direct about it of the women I have met.

You might want to peruse european publications and get a sense of how American women are seen.




Indeed, my home is a "insert my name" -ocracy. *I live alone*
However, I do not have anger and rage. I am very easy going, and when sharing a home with someone, they generally put down the seat. If it so happens it is left up, I have no problem putting it down without incident of further mention.

My kind of woman.... I know you girls are out there... just hard to find.

As far as the characterization of American women, I have family from several countries - and have found we're all bitches in some respect. People can be mean, shrill, angry, prone to complaining, whatever. This is not unique to American women, nor women in general.

Well, this is true to some extent.... the spoilage I am referring to however is fairly unique to women in America.
It is their attitude toward men, and their general assumption that they are always right and the man always wrong that differentiates them from women elsewhere in the world.


Biggest bitch I know is a 70 year old male, who is a decorated military veteran and ex cop. He always gets his way, bitching and complaining as needed, and that's just the way it is. :yup:

Why? why does he get his way? For women they get their way because they have something men want badly.
Is this guy gonna leave someone some money?

My rule... be nice to everyone... especially those who handle your food...
 

Phil Ayesho

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in my life time, i hope that i'll live to see societies trash this type of mumbo-jumbo and both sexes can distrubute house work, and other types of work, equally.

That is a silly myth... that there is such a thing as equality.

DEFINE equality in a way that satisfies both men and women.

As long as women are the sole arbiters of what qualifies as "equal" things will not be equal.

As long as what women want is unequal, then things will be unequal.

I would love to live in a world where a woman pulled precisely the same weight as a man... but I don't.

When it comes to being a fireman or working on a road crew... women don't do nearly what a man has to do.

When it comes to rearing babies and taking care of the home environment, men don't do nearly what women do.

Women and men are different... they have different brains and bodies... they want and yearn for different things...

Women are better suited for child care than are men, in general, because they have a million years of evolutionary preparation for the job.

Men are better at the single minded focus of bring home the bacon bring home the bacon bring home the bacon... because that is what they evolved to do...

Real equality would be for each to admire and value the attributes of the other... and DIVIDE labor in the way that best furthers their goals.


You gals whine about equality... but talk to some men.... I can't remember a time when I was treated as an equal by an American woman.

And... as long women regard everything male as wrong, or in need of change, then I will never see a day where I am treated as an equal by women.
 

SandraSmithCarver

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I have many: :tongue:
Some men are more trouble than they are worth.
Being single isn't so bad.
Men are like children, only bigger and more destructive.


Yep they sure are!
A lot of men seem like they are just looking for a mother, im raising my boys to cook and clean
 

D_Fiona_Farvel

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Why? why does he get his way? For women they get their way because they have something men want badly.
Is this guy gonna leave someone some money?

My rule... be nice to everyone... especially those who handle your food...
He gets his way because he is daddy.
I come from a paternal culture; they all get their way.
Most of these men produce daughters and we all turn out basically the same - we work, we marry, we have kids and do not stop working. Doesn't matter if our moms are American, German (we have one ;)), British (two), Pinay (several), French, or Korean - work wins, daddy wins, grannies babysit. :)

Contrary to your experiences, we also do not yell, bitch, or complain at our husbands. We all cater to daddy, and my mom, aunts, and grandmothers always fix and present their dinner, drinks, mail, everything. even though my dad does his own laundry, nice life for them, no? quite different from the American women you've experienced?
 

B_Demention

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Having moved from Europe to the States at age 18 I can say there is a huge difference between women on the two continents. Over here, women do essentially run the show and back home it's still very much a man's world. When I was growing up, it was always "oh, what will your father say?" whereas in the US I think kids are actually more afraid of their mothers, seeing dad as a kind of sympathetic but inept stepping stone. In Europe the gender roles are also more clearly defined, so I'm fucked since I got over here as I can hardly figure out the laundry or how to cook an egg. I've also had a hard time having to adjust to women asking more of men since I've been in the States (in my romantic relationships). I am very much used to just kind of doing what I want and not answering to anyone, but since I got here it's been kind of like having to face the music whenever I've done something that's not 100% okay. So it's been tough balancing power properly. I've noticed that lots of women here do seem to like giving the man the impression that he controls things when he really doesn't. It's actually quite manipulative. In many instances, I'd rather be alone over here than in some setup where I feel put down all the time. I refuse to be Archie Bunker or Homer Simpson and yet that is exactly the kind of path that seems laid out for guys over here. I'll try to keep my independence as long as possible.