I am SO completely, 100%, don't-ask-no-questions gay

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by marleyisalegend, Oct 10, 2008.

  1. marleyisalegend

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2007
    Messages:
    5,587
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    charlotte
    Well, I've never done anything with a guy. But I see guys all the time!:biggrin1: Like, everywhere I go, there's guys.

    Hold on, my girlfriend wants me to plow her vajayjay real quick...

    Now, where was I? Oh yeah, I'm sooooo gay. Well, I've never done anything with a guy, but calling myself "straight" just doesn't feel natural. It's not who I am.

    Damnit! Hold on, Marley jr. got into the fingerpaint again. Damnit, I love my wife and our child but sometimes they're such a pain. That's why I'm gay. Like, soooo gay.

    Okay, okay, never touched a penis, guilty as charged. But, I dunno, I'm just not comfortable with that whole "heterosexual" title.

    Aw shit, wifey looks like she's ready for me to kiss her on her lips (the ones between her hips).

    Later Gaytors.
     
  2. B_VinylBoy

    B_VinylBoy New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2007
    Messages:
    10,516
    Likes Received:
    7
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Boston, MA / New York, NY
    So THAT's how you spell vajayjay!!! I kept using e's. LOL!!!!
     
  3. marleyisalegend

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2007
    Messages:
    5,587
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    charlotte
    ^ROTFLMAO! Ur such a nut.
     
  4. D_Relentless Original

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2008
    Messages:
    16,839
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    10
    Gender:
    Male
    ^ A lovely nut though ^:wink:
     
  5. ManlyBanisters

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2007
    Messages:
    12,807
    Likes Received:
    8
    Goddammit Marley!! Have you been at my meds again?!?

    I told you the reds were only for special occasions!! :mad:
     
  6. cockoloco

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 26, 2008
    Messages:
    2,766
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Marley, if you look at your wife's boobs, does that make you 3.65% straight?
     
  7. killerb

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2007
    Messages:
    2,102
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    47
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    USA
    Verified:
    Photo
    *waiting for guys in white coats to arrive*


    lol
     
  8. cockoloco

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 26, 2008
    Messages:
    2,766
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Oh they won't come. They have come soooo many times, we pay them monthly fees now. You, however, that's a different story...:cool:
     
  9. B_Nick8

    B_Nick8 New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2007
    Messages:
    11,912
    Likes Received:
    44
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New York City, by way of Marblehead, Boston and Ge
    I have not been this shocked since Clay Aiken.
     
  10. marleyisalegend

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2007
    Messages:
    5,587
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    charlotte
    Guys, what's the big deal? I'm just a gay man living a straight man's life?

    Quick question though, would it make me straight if I actually like fingering my wife? I mean, just a little bit. I don't get a full-on stiffy, just a chubby.
     
  11. B_VinylBoy

    B_VinylBoy New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2007
    Messages:
    10,516
    Likes Received:
    7
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Boston, MA / New York, NY
    Which finger? And are you wearing any rings besides one for a cock?
     
  12. marleyisalegend

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2007
    Messages:
    5,587
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    charlotte
    Well, I usually use two, see you can extend one, slightly bend the other, and cover more "ground" so to speak. See, I know a lot about fingering women. I'm still gay though. Totally gay.

    The only ring I wear is my wedding ring to remind me of my lovely marriage to my lovely wife. I'm glad she doesn't mind that I'm 100% gay, I don't even like women...that much....well, boobs are nice. And it feels good when she tickles me.

    *rubs my own nipples*

    *stops immediately*

    But! No! I'm not straight. 100% gay.
     
  13. cockoloco

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 26, 2008
    Messages:
    2,766
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    LMAO!

    No! God Forbid! Maybe it's teh air conditioning that makes the air hot and it just looks a bit bigger but it's not an erection at all. You can't be excited, it's not normal.

    ROFL!

    ROTFLMAO!

    Marley, tell me something: When you make love to her, do you think of having amazing sex with Jennifer Aniston or being tied up and spanked hard by Antonio Banderas.

    That should help.
     
  14. marleyisalegend

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2007
    Messages:
    5,587
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    charlotte
    Jennifer Aniston all the way! She's SUCH a babe. Those eyes, that chest, that ass....too bad I could never enjoy that though, I'm just a gay guy.:frown1:
     
  15. D_Seymour_Dix

    D_Seymour_Dix New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2008
    Messages:
    721
    Likes Received:
    1
  16. Drifterwood

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 14, 2007
    Messages:
    15,725
    Likes Received:
    386
    Location:
    Fingringhoe (GB)
    Do you like the Sound of Music more than your wife?
     
  17. 8060

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2008
    Messages:
    1,363
    Albums:
    3
    Likes Received:
    1,026
    Location:
    The Midwest
    Verified:
    Photo
    Marley, if you don't get your hand out my POCKET...I swear I'm gonna tell your wife that we just adopted one of Angelina's babies...and that we took a super mortgage out with AIG and that she'll be homeless by November 1st.

    GET YOUR HAND OUT OF MY POCKET! Damnit, man! Compose yourself!
     
  18. cockoloco

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 26, 2008
    Messages:
    2,766
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    You have to accept that you're not 100% gay Marley. Your family will not be proud, I know. But embrace who you are. Get in the closet!
     
  19. cockoloco

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 26, 2008
    Messages:
    2,766
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    LOL!!!:eek::eek::eek:
     
  20. Drifterwood

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 14, 2007
    Messages:
    15,725
    Likes Received:
    386
    Location:
    Fingringhoe (GB)
    He would, but I fear it's full of ABBA costumes.
     
Draft saved Draft deleted