I used to live most of my life in Argentina with my parents and I always wanted to move to the US when I finished High School. So well I did last summer and decided to take until Spring 09 to start college in the US. Meanwhile It couldn't be long until I fully started exploring my sexuality (Im bi omg) so I met a guy and we hit off really well, he's a dream, six pack, great chest and arms, good personality, just a dream. Over there, in Argentina, for men to have gay relationships it's a huuuge deal so we just met @ X, and went to a motel to have some fun, ^^ and it just kept getting better, until it turned for the worst... after about four time without any of us knowing my dad followed us.
So when my and my ex were in the bed doing the nasty we get a call from the owner of the motel saying a guy with a gray car was looking for a blue car, I immediately knew it was my dad, my boy turned white, I knew my dad didn't see me get in the car so we dress up real quick, he gets me in the trunk of the car and I hid there he got on the car and sped like hell. There was no way my dad could possibly catch his car cause it was a lil bit prepared to run. While I was in the trunk I was hyperventilating and thinking my life is over, also getting a bunch of calls from home (which was mom calling obviously), after a lot of twists and turns we lost my dad and my boy got me out of the trunk of the car, then I told him to go to his house or wherever that we couldn't be caught together and he left me there, far away from home, with a tropical storm, in some random ave.
I quickly went into damage control mode and call my then best friend who knew about my sexuality and told her to cover me just in case someone calls and say I was with her that night. Then got a Taxi, tossed my cellphone and came with the excuse that I didn't take any calls was because i lost my cellphone and that I was with my friend. I am a great actor and hid how horrible I felt. When I came home my mom was crying like I died or something and I was asking her what was wrong but she never told me anything and my dad came up with the excuse that someone called him from work and he had to go.
I was supposed to go to the US 6 days after "The Event", during those days they were spying me and not letting me go anywhere unsupervised and asking me a bunch of questions about sexuality and hinting if I was gay. I was supposed to have a 'Get away party' but none of my friends showed up, I didn't have many friends but I didnt think no one was gonna come. I felt really bad so I went to the movie theater but I noticed my parents didn't leave me in the mall and left, my mom got out of the car as soon as I got up some stairs like I was some moronic idiot that wasn't gonna notice that they were there, I got sooo mad I could have killed someone that day. Thankfully the day after I flew to the US.
I moved with my aunt, and a couple cousins. I do like hanging around with them and living as well but my aunt is going through a rough time, financially, and I don't really feel confortable in here cause I don't have my own space. I used to have a huge bedroom with it's own bathroom when I was in argentina, my house is 500 sqt meters, 2 stories, a really nice place, and I miss my comfort. I can't keep living without my own space and that's why I wanna be independent but I really can't afford everything cause I'm gonna be a full time student in a community college and i rent a room with just a part time.
Also I am very overwhelmed with all the process I have to go through with applying for college, getting financial aid, finding out about in which 4year college Im gonna finish my last couple years and just starting life in general. I feel like all the sudden I'm on my own. Plus there was virtually no counselor in my high school so Im complete clueless and so were my parents for not finding out about college when I was starting high school and leaving me with all that and doing what people do in 3-4 years in just less than 3 months. =[
Also I find out that my supposedly best friend TOLD EVERYONE MY DAD CAUGHT ME IN A MOTEL WITH A GUY to all the people I went to school with. I wanted to die when I found out but I denied it and only two people had the courage to talk to me on msn and say "is it true that blah blah blah?". So my reputation is ruined, and I was betrayed by that bitch. I'm so glad I never told him about my boy's identity (cause he asked me to) she would have ruined his life as well. He felt so bad for everything that happen, we even cried on webcam and feel like crap cause we can't see each other anymore. We're not dating anymore cause we're too far away but the feelings are still there, we still talk all the time and he's one of the 3 people I trust.
So I'm left here with 3 options:
1. Go back to Argentina, and go to college there. I'd be comfortable, with less things on my shoulder, and a lot less stress but I could turn into a hell if my parents start monitoring my life and try to humilliate me if they find out about "IT". And all the people could reject me and turn against me cause the college that I would go there if I go back is full of people from that school. Another plus from this option is that Im closer to my ex.
2. Stay here with my aunt and try to take all this discomfort and keep myself in the closet until I finish college and I can support myself. I love the US culture and lifestyle and don't wanna go back
3. Join the Army/Navy/Air Force and disappear from all my family. They pay well, and they would help me pay college as well but I put my life in danger and I'm against war but I could suck it up.
So this is how I ruined my life in less that 4 months. Sorry for the huge wall of text but I had to let it out.
Btw I do feel depressed and would easily end this with suicide but I don't wanna take the easy way out but Im suffering way too much. Oh, also I worry about being disinherited. And my brother is an $^^@*(! he can't take everything.
Again sorry for the huge wall of text.
So when my and my ex were in the bed doing the nasty we get a call from the owner of the motel saying a guy with a gray car was looking for a blue car, I immediately knew it was my dad, my boy turned white, I knew my dad didn't see me get in the car so we dress up real quick, he gets me in the trunk of the car and I hid there he got on the car and sped like hell. There was no way my dad could possibly catch his car cause it was a lil bit prepared to run. While I was in the trunk I was hyperventilating and thinking my life is over, also getting a bunch of calls from home (which was mom calling obviously), after a lot of twists and turns we lost my dad and my boy got me out of the trunk of the car, then I told him to go to his house or wherever that we couldn't be caught together and he left me there, far away from home, with a tropical storm, in some random ave.
I quickly went into damage control mode and call my then best friend who knew about my sexuality and told her to cover me just in case someone calls and say I was with her that night. Then got a Taxi, tossed my cellphone and came with the excuse that I didn't take any calls was because i lost my cellphone and that I was with my friend. I am a great actor and hid how horrible I felt. When I came home my mom was crying like I died or something and I was asking her what was wrong but she never told me anything and my dad came up with the excuse that someone called him from work and he had to go.
I was supposed to go to the US 6 days after "The Event", during those days they were spying me and not letting me go anywhere unsupervised and asking me a bunch of questions about sexuality and hinting if I was gay. I was supposed to have a 'Get away party' but none of my friends showed up, I didn't have many friends but I didnt think no one was gonna come. I felt really bad so I went to the movie theater but I noticed my parents didn't leave me in the mall and left, my mom got out of the car as soon as I got up some stairs like I was some moronic idiot that wasn't gonna notice that they were there, I got sooo mad I could have killed someone that day. Thankfully the day after I flew to the US.
I moved with my aunt, and a couple cousins. I do like hanging around with them and living as well but my aunt is going through a rough time, financially, and I don't really feel confortable in here cause I don't have my own space. I used to have a huge bedroom with it's own bathroom when I was in argentina, my house is 500 sqt meters, 2 stories, a really nice place, and I miss my comfort. I can't keep living without my own space and that's why I wanna be independent but I really can't afford everything cause I'm gonna be a full time student in a community college and i rent a room with just a part time.
Also I am very overwhelmed with all the process I have to go through with applying for college, getting financial aid, finding out about in which 4year college Im gonna finish my last couple years and just starting life in general. I feel like all the sudden I'm on my own. Plus there was virtually no counselor in my high school so Im complete clueless and so were my parents for not finding out about college when I was starting high school and leaving me with all that and doing what people do in 3-4 years in just less than 3 months. =[
Also I find out that my supposedly best friend TOLD EVERYONE MY DAD CAUGHT ME IN A MOTEL WITH A GUY to all the people I went to school with. I wanted to die when I found out but I denied it and only two people had the courage to talk to me on msn and say "is it true that blah blah blah?". So my reputation is ruined, and I was betrayed by that bitch. I'm so glad I never told him about my boy's identity (cause he asked me to) she would have ruined his life as well. He felt so bad for everything that happen, we even cried on webcam and feel like crap cause we can't see each other anymore. We're not dating anymore cause we're too far away but the feelings are still there, we still talk all the time and he's one of the 3 people I trust.
So I'm left here with 3 options:
1. Go back to Argentina, and go to college there. I'd be comfortable, with less things on my shoulder, and a lot less stress but I could turn into a hell if my parents start monitoring my life and try to humilliate me if they find out about "IT". And all the people could reject me and turn against me cause the college that I would go there if I go back is full of people from that school. Another plus from this option is that Im closer to my ex.
2. Stay here with my aunt and try to take all this discomfort and keep myself in the closet until I finish college and I can support myself. I love the US culture and lifestyle and don't wanna go back
3. Join the Army/Navy/Air Force and disappear from all my family. They pay well, and they would help me pay college as well but I put my life in danger and I'm against war but I could suck it up.
So this is how I ruined my life in less that 4 months. Sorry for the huge wall of text but I had to let it out.
Btw I do feel depressed and would easily end this with suicide but I don't wanna take the easy way out but Im suffering way too much. Oh, also I worry about being disinherited. And my brother is an $^^@*(! he can't take everything.
Again sorry for the huge wall of text.
