I don't know what to feel.

tickle123

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Okay, so I'm 18 and I started hanging round with a new bunch of friends over the easter holidays and they are all so lovely. Two of the lads that are in the group of friends are kind of in an open relationship with each other, and the other night, one made a pass at me and well I didn't stop him at first then I did because I felt bad for the other one. Anyway, over the last few days he has been saying If i had met him before now things would have been different etc etc. Yet when they are together they are all over each other. I don't want to be a part of an open relationship but it's killing me ufgkdjfghdsjg

i feel headfucked.
 

B_Nick8

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Things would have been different how? It doesn't sound to me like this guy is mature enough to commit to a relationship with just one person now anyway and if that's what you're looking for, I doubt he's it. Clearly he's attracted to you physically and probably personally as well but he is to his 'partner' too. I think that you're probably best advised not to continue a physical relationship with him and if you find it difficult to be around him, a personal one for the time being. If there's something between the two of you worth pursuing it should probably wait until he's free and clear.

And keep in mind that according to the rules of his current relationship you've done nothing wrong. Nor, in this instance, are the feelings of his partner your concern.
 

jeepboi87

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its cool 2 fuck around with a couple in an open relationship...but not cool if 1 of them is saying they wish they would have met you before...does the other know anything or is it all behind his back? if its behind his back...thats not open its cheating...if its just sex & the other knows whats up...go 4 it
 

tickle123

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its cool 2 fuck around with a couple in an open relationship...but not cool if 1 of them is saying they wish they would have met you before...does the other know anything or is it all behind his back? if its behind his back...thats not open its cheating...if its just sex & the other knows whats up...go 4 it

Yeah it is behind the other ones back, but the other one said they liked me too now. This is turning into such a mess, they both like me but wont tell each other about it.
 

tickle123

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Things would have been different how? It doesn't sound to me like this guy is mature enough to commit to a relationship with just one person now anyway and if that's what you're looking for, I doubt he's it. Clearly he's attracted to you physically and probably personally as well but he is to his 'partner' too. I think that you're probably best advised not to continue a physical relationship with him and if you find it difficult to be around him, a personal one for the time being. If there's something between the two of you worth pursuing it should probably wait until he's free and clear.

And keep in mind that according to the rules of his current relationship you've done nothing wrong. Nor, in this instance, are the feelings of his partner your concern.

You're right. I just don't know what to do, I feel like a new toy and he can flirt with me etc, then go running back to his partner.
 

MarkLondon

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You're right. I just don't know what to do, I feel like a new toy and he can flirt with me etc, then go running back to his partner.

Well, call me cynical, but isn't that the point for guys in open relationships? I can't be bothered with those guys myself, unless it's for an anonymous one-off experience.

But this is even more complicated than that, you're all in the same social circle. Another no-no as far as I'm concerned. It could easily get very messy. Try and keep on good platonic (non-sexual) terms with everybody.

BTW, who is that in your avatar?
 
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tickle123

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Well, call me cynical, but isn't that the point for guys in open relationships? I can't be bothered with those guys myself, unless it's for an anonymous one-off experience.

But this is even more complicated than that, you're all in the same social circle. Another no-no as far as I'm concerned. It could easily get very messy. Try and keep on good platonic (non-sexual) terms with everybody.

BTW, who is that in your avatar?


Yeah It's so annoying, because I do like one of them but there is no point even persuing it because I am really good friends with the other one. They both have told me their relationship isn't going to well, but I know if things blow up, I am going to be to blame.



It's Lady GaGa by the way.
 

MarkLondon

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Ah, then maybe if you bide your time you can get him on the rebound, heh heh. Though it's still going to be awkward if you're friends with the partner. But do let them break up for their own reasons first.

Lady GaGa! At first I thought she sounded too much like Britney, but I'm getting to like her.
 

killerb

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take a step back from both of them...
once their relationship is over, you can then make a move on the one you want...

but be warned...if a serious relationship is what you want, it's doubtful you'll get it from him...
 

ruggero

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Yes look at him in the relationship he's in. Then step back and think what he'd be like in a relationship with you..untrustworthy, is my guess.
On the other hand you can always have a threesome with the two of them.
If they're comfortably together they'll close ranks on you as they are the couple.
But as they are tottering at the moment then you'll break them up and make enemies.
These are only scenarios you'll need to assess them.
But if they are still together just tell him you have too much respect for them and that he should work out his priorities.
If they implode you can wait a while then have him as casual sex but i doubt you'd get any permanent joy out of him.
Oh, the joys of youth!