Hi!
I need to get this out of my chest... Am I a side? Let me explain, my anal experience (I'm a "bottom") hasn't been great... It's not that I don't like bottoming, it's just annoying to prepare for it so it's just easier not doing anal. And here's the thing, I feel absolutely NO pleasure AT ALL by bottoming. I don't understand this bottoms on Twitter (or literally all bottoms, on grindr etc) that love it and enjoy it? I WISH was like that too because I feel terrible about myself.
The problem with bottoming is that it's extremely uncomfortable, it doesn't feel good like for example would feel for a women and her clit, it's more... painful I would say, very uncomfortable and I cannot last more than 5 min getting fucked (doesn't matter the size), and I only feel pleasure if I'm wanking at the same time (feels very good and I could cum in literally 30 seconds) but If I don't touch it, it's just very uncomfortable inside and I just want it to stop.
I don't know if I'm a side maybe? I feel very weird about myself... It's strange, it's not like I don't like anal, it's just that I absolutely don't mind If I skip it tbh... I have had anal sex that I enjoyed, but maybe 2 times out of literally 8,000 fucks, not exaggerating.
People who bottom, do you REALLY get pleasure? I see people using dildos and stuff and it's just HOW?! Yes I can use a dildo on myself too (and a penis) but it doesn't make me feel anything, just mild pain (again, unless I touch myself).
I have been through this weird sexual journey, sometimes I kinda enjoy it, and 99% of the time I don't enjoy it, so I don't know if I'm a side, or what? It's very frustrating, I consider myself a bottom and also like being submissive, but I don't think I would be the kind of boyfriend that would bottom every single day, I just couldn't, maybe once a week, I don't mind it, and I would actually kinda like it from time to time, just not 24/7.
And this is a very painful thing to go through being gay, at least in my case, because on grindr or even in a gay club, If I meet someone, they WILL want to top me (I know for a fact) and I just get so extremely anxious because I know I will feel pain and not pleasure, that's what I want, pleasure just like a woman gets (talking in general, might be some woman that don't get pleasure and blah blah but you know what I mean).
Am I doomed? Am I a side? Am I a half baked bottom? I don't know... I think about it and I don't think I'm a side because anal attracts me a lot, but then when I do it it's not very pleasant so I end up thinking I might be a Side, so I don't really know. I really want to bottom, I absolutely love the idea of it, and having a man top me, the problem is when I'm actually doing it, I just want it to end after 5 min if not less.
I know there are tops that are very bad at it... trust me... but it's not the case, even when people that are good, I felt the same, I'm just going crazy and I feel so depressed that I cannot enjoy sex fully, just because of whatever's wrong with me.
Any advise? Ideas?
Thank you!
I need to get this out of my chest... Am I a side? Let me explain, my anal experience (I'm a "bottom") hasn't been great... It's not that I don't like bottoming, it's just annoying to prepare for it so it's just easier not doing anal. And here's the thing, I feel absolutely NO pleasure AT ALL by bottoming. I don't understand this bottoms on Twitter (or literally all bottoms, on grindr etc) that love it and enjoy it? I WISH was like that too because I feel terrible about myself.
The problem with bottoming is that it's extremely uncomfortable, it doesn't feel good like for example would feel for a women and her clit, it's more... painful I would say, very uncomfortable and I cannot last more than 5 min getting fucked (doesn't matter the size), and I only feel pleasure if I'm wanking at the same time (feels very good and I could cum in literally 30 seconds) but If I don't touch it, it's just very uncomfortable inside and I just want it to stop.
I don't know if I'm a side maybe? I feel very weird about myself... It's strange, it's not like I don't like anal, it's just that I absolutely don't mind If I skip it tbh... I have had anal sex that I enjoyed, but maybe 2 times out of literally 8,000 fucks, not exaggerating.
People who bottom, do you REALLY get pleasure? I see people using dildos and stuff and it's just HOW?! Yes I can use a dildo on myself too (and a penis) but it doesn't make me feel anything, just mild pain (again, unless I touch myself).
I have been through this weird sexual journey, sometimes I kinda enjoy it, and 99% of the time I don't enjoy it, so I don't know if I'm a side, or what? It's very frustrating, I consider myself a bottom and also like being submissive, but I don't think I would be the kind of boyfriend that would bottom every single day, I just couldn't, maybe once a week, I don't mind it, and I would actually kinda like it from time to time, just not 24/7.
And this is a very painful thing to go through being gay, at least in my case, because on grindr or even in a gay club, If I meet someone, they WILL want to top me (I know for a fact) and I just get so extremely anxious because I know I will feel pain and not pleasure, that's what I want, pleasure just like a woman gets (talking in general, might be some woman that don't get pleasure and blah blah but you know what I mean).
Am I doomed? Am I a side? Am I a half baked bottom? I don't know... I think about it and I don't think I'm a side because anal attracts me a lot, but then when I do it it's not very pleasant so I end up thinking I might be a Side, so I don't really know. I really want to bottom, I absolutely love the idea of it, and having a man top me, the problem is when I'm actually doing it, I just want it to end after 5 min if not less.
I know there are tops that are very bad at it... trust me... but it's not the case, even when people that are good, I felt the same, I'm just going crazy and I feel so depressed that I cannot enjoy sex fully, just because of whatever's wrong with me.
Any advise? Ideas?
Thank you!