I fucking hate my body...

[798686]

Dont like your body?fix it.

Aww, thanks Britney. Helpful.

You might have missed the part where he explained that his body is working against him - i.e. ailments to deal with, in addition to trying to buff up.

 

[joebigcock]

and yet currently media and cultural pressures on men to look a certain way are increasing significantly. I know I feel that pressure fairly often, not sure how I feel about it, sometimes I like that there's something to motivate me at other times I feel pretty oppressed by what I think I should be aspiring to look like.

I know exactly what you mean, from watching tv you'd think every man was movie star handsome and ridiculously ripped. As well as that, while society has picked up on the fact that portraying women as sex objects is wrong, men are fair game because we don't have the same hang ups. Quite often on tv ads for products that aren't even glamourous too, they will use sort of an attractive mum like woman but the man will be a tanned muscular guy with white teeth. It seems like the idea of an attractive woman is more varied and diverse whereas what makes an attractive man is very set in stone, and if you don't fit the mould then tough. Anyone else agree?

 

[joebigcock]

And lol, Joll

 

[fratpack]

there are many many days when i wish i was not in this body. the physical pain i go through on a daily basis is sometimes more than i can deal. my years of playing sports i guess have caught up with me and oftentimes it is difficult for me to walk for more than a couple of blocks. i do physical therapy to help build muscles but sometimes it gets so overwhelming.

 

[B_Bjen2848]

Well firstly you admitted to loving your body, so presumably you don't have any insights to share on the subject of the thread. Secondly, it's the complete opposite of "positive advice" to tell people who do have problems with the way they look that their problems will make them sexually unattractive, it's not even really advice, it's just your fairly erroneous and unhelpful opinion (offered, I suspect, purely in an attempt to make you feel superior in some way) besides I don't recall anyone soliciting your "helpful advice".

My intuition is that you had no intention of being positive or helpful. So with that in mind, lets consider this conversation between you and I closed shall we? So the thread can return to its intended purpose.

not really? but whatever you're going to have your opinion of me anyway, even if its based off nothing ... with that being said all i was trying to say is that getting upset over your body is a waste of time because it doesn't solve whatever "problem" it may be that you have with yourself ... no need to throw your insecurities at me for trying to be nice and try to be supportive (this is a large penis SUPPORT group btw) even if it was not the most helpful thing at the time ... you can continue in your self loathing now :dunno:

 

[B_Nick8]

See, I've never really been able to translate the things other people say about my body into the language I use about myself. I always presume that even if there's a kernel of truth to the compliments others give me that they're also just being nice and trying to make me feel good. Some degree of polite or well-meaning exaggeration.

Given everything I can see, I fucking love your body. Moreover, I fucking love the whole package and I'm not just referring to your dick.

And I never give gratuitous compliments. I only tell my truths.

 

[B_jeepguy2]

I suppose I wanted to start this thread to discuss issues men (and women too for that matter) may have surrounding their bodies.


Men are in general discouraged from discussing how they feel about their self image, and yet currently media and cultural pressures on men to look a certain way are increasing significantly. I know I feel that pressure fairly often, not sure how I feel about it, sometimes I like that there's something to motivate me at other times I feel pretty oppressed by what I think I should be aspiring to look like.

I'd quite like to not have to feel forced to workout, or go to yoga, or all the other little annoying things I'm compelled to do, or just not guilty about pigging out on those incredibly rare occassions I allow myself to do so.

I don't really hate my body, but I sometimes come close to it, I have a lot of health issues which at this point in my life I'm sick to fuck of dealing with and talking about, none of which helps me with the whole trying to keep in shape thing. I sometimes describe my body as uncooperative, in doing so I'm deploying that charmingly English habit of understatement. In fact I don't hate my body, it hates me. :tongue:

TBH it's wearisome, feeling constantly like I need to look like a strappingly healthy 20 year old who works out twice a day, when I'm a less than perfectly healthy (see there's that charming habit again) 31 year old who has a job and doesn't always have the time or the energy to follow the Brazilian Body plan.


Anyways, I just thought I'd share a little and open the discussion see if anyone else out there is feeling less than enamoured (see I did it again) of the flesh they inhabit.

I know the feeling dude. I have chonic medical problems that I am completely sick of dealing with too. I used to be a great looking guy then I was diagnosed with chronic medical issues at age 20 and put on steroids (Prednisone) and it made me gain 30 lbs. I used to be slim but now I look like an aging fraternity boy who still drinks too much beer. LOL My bottom teeth have also started getting really crowded up as I have gotten older but I can't begin to afford the $8K my dentist said it would cost to straighten them with Invisalign.:frown1:

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

This is a hard one for me personally to reply to...

I have, since the age of 11 (the past 14 years) felt uncomfortable in my body, if it is viewed as being good OR bad...

In general I am happiest if no attention is paid to my physicality (oddly though, I am only talking about face to face attention, online is just different lol)

So called 'positive' attention tends to make me want to shy away, as if if they look at me too long I might have to live up to that positive attention in some way; and frankly 'negative' attention just makes me feel bad... So I can't win...

I have recently lost a LOT of weight (110lbs over the last 18 months-ish) so I guess despite my previously stated attitude I do in some way feel a need to look 'attractive' as defined by the majority... Personally I put this down to survival instinct...

As for 'hating my body' I can't say that I do. I disagree with a LOT of the choices that my body tries to force me to make in the way it reacts to certain stimuli (over eating) but having been quite, quite ill twice in my life (both illnesses brought me close to death on more occasions than I care to remember), and ignored by the medical profession when I asked for help the only thing that has allowed me to survive is the capacity for health that my body has naturally... So I can't really hate it due to my those experiences since you have to be ALIVE to hate something...

-J- x

Well knowing you're sensitive about it I wont compliment you on how you loook right now, but I'll congratulate you on what is an epic weight loss I lost 85lbs 10 years ago and have kept it off so I know exactly how much work you put into that, seriously you should be incredibly pleased and proud of yourself. :redface:

Dont like your body?fix it.

OK, honestly I wish I could just fix my body. I have three incurable neurological conditions (one of which would have killed me a long time ago if I weren't fully medicated for it), one serious and at times debilitating skin condition, liver damage from the meds I take and a childhood illness, and a disorder of the alimentary canal which my doctors haven't yet aggreed a diagnosis for.


I take shit loads of meds, with loads of side effects; of my neurological meds at least two have the so called "minor side effects" of muscle growth inhibition and weight gain along with other less friendly effects.

And yet I still lost 85 lbs 10 years ago and have kept it off, I eat a balanced and healthy diet, I work out 4 times a week and do yoga twice a week. I don't drink alcohol except on special occassions, I haven't been anywhere near fast-food in more than ten years.

I probably live a more healthily, and do more of the stuff that's supposed to "fix" my body than most people do.

I know exactly what you mean, from watching tv you'd think every man was movie star handsome and ridiculously ripped. As well as that, while society has picked up on the fact that portraying women as sex objects is wrong, men are fair game because we don't have the same hang ups. Quite often on tv ads for products that aren't even glamourous too, they will use sort of an attractive mum like woman but the man will be a tanned muscular guy with white teeth. It seems like the idea of an attractive woman is more varied and diverse whereas what makes an attractive man is very set in stone, and if you don't fit the mould then tough. Anyone else agree?

This is true, I mean I'm not stupid enough to think that I should look like a model, I know that men come in all shapes and sizes, and to some extent I like that there is some degree of pressure on me to keep in shape, but that doesn't mean I don't feel slightly oppressed sometimes by the endless stream of abs and pecs and perfect skin which are part of the wallpaper of our culture these days.

there are many many days when i wish i was not in this body. the physical pain i go through on a daily basis is sometimes more than i can deal. my years of playing sports i guess have caught up with me and oftentimes it is difficult for me to walk for more than a couple of blocks. i do physical therapy to help build muscles but sometimes it gets so overwhelming.

I'm really sorry you suffer so much pain Frat :frown1: I sometimes feel a little trapped inside my body, I can only imagine how you must feel. I hope that your doctors find you appropriate treatment and you start to get some relief. :redface:

not really? but whatever you're going to have your opinion of me anyway, even if its based off nothing ... with that being said all i was trying to say is that getting upset over your body is a waste of time because it doesn't solve whatever "problem" it may be that you have with yourself ... no need to throw your insecurities at me for trying to be nice and try to be supportive (this is a large penis SUPPORT group btw) even if it was not the most helpful thing at the time ... you can continue in your self loathing now :dunno:

I don't loathe myself in the slightest, and your posts to this thread have not been supportive or nice, they were at best thoughtlessly unhelpful and are now simply trolling. Now please stop attempting to threadjack and either contribute something helpful or move on. I wont ask again, I'll just report you.

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

Given everything I can see, I fucking love your body. Moreover, I fucking love the whole package and I'm not just referring to your dick.

And I never give gratuitous compliments. I only tell my truths.

You are so lovely, thank you very much, I appreciate you compliments. Though as I say I wasn't fishing for them. :wink::redface:

I know the feeling dude. I have chonic medical problems that I am completely sick of dealing with too. I used to be a great looking guy then I was diagnosed with chronic medical issues at age 20 and put on steroids (Prednisone) and it made me gain 30 lbs. I used to be slim but now I look like an aging fraternity boy who still drinks too much beer. LOL My bottom teeth have also started getting really crowded up as I have gotten older but I can't begin to afford the $8K my dentist said it would cost to straighten them with Invisalign.:frown1:

Prednisone is horrid! You're like me, you health issues came on early in life, I started needing heavy medication for epilepsy that made me put on serious weight at age 17, I was huge by the age of 20. I feel slightly cheated of that period of youthful carefree good health.

Dentistry is unbelievably expensive, I mean I know healthcare and medical treatment in general are more expensive in the US than elsewhere, have you considered traveling abroad for the treatment you need? I know a lot of my US friends have done that and it cost less to visit another country and have their teeth done even with the cost of flights and accommodation etc... :redface:

 

[fratpack]

hilaire, thank you for caring, it helps. hopefully, there will be an end to it.

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

hilaire, thank you for caring, it helps. hopefully, there will be an end to it.

A happy and healthy one I hope :wink:

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

I can relate, have terrible insecurity issues, sometimes they even keep me up at night

Hey I know what you're talking about, I actually lost sleep last week because I had to miss yoga and attend a work related function instead, I kept planning my workouts in my head to make up for it :redface::wink:

 

[tanguy21]

thank god there are others out there. i used to hate my body, now i can deal with it but it can be better. i am very self conscious ever since i was in middle school. im in the gym 6 days a week trying to get a better body. its annoying because females think they have it hard trying to keep a good body, but really we have it equally as hard!

 

[MrHangman]

Sometimes I feel bad about my body, but then I read about situations like yours (OP). Sure, I may not be the best looker, but at least it's healthy and functioning. I wish you the best in your life to a happy mindset and a healthy body.

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

thank god there are others out there. i used to hate my body, now i can deal with it but it can be better. i am very self conscious ever since i was in middle school. im in the gym 6 days a week trying to get a better body. its annoying because females think they have it hard trying to keep a good body, but really we have it equally as hard!

I genuinely think that the prevailing wisdom is that it's easier for men to stay in shape, but actually the way our lives are lead these days makes it just as difficult for men to remain fit as it does women. And I know just how difficult it can be to develop a strong healthy body, it's not like men can just starve themselves thin, we have to actually beat our bodies into shape with hard labour of some kind. And I think that the pressures on men to look hard bodied and cut are increasing, and it's not even challenged, people pressume all men can look like that.

Sometimes I feel bad about my body, but then I read about situations like yours (OP). Sure, I may not be the best looker, but at least it's healthy and functioning. I wish you the best in your life to a happy mindset and a healthy body.

If it's any consolation I would KILL to have your body :wink:

 

[ArtofDesire]

Don't know if anyone is interested in a woman's post here, but when I was a teenager I weighed 120 lbs (I'm 5'-8" tall and large boned) and all the way through my 30's I never figured I'd have do any work to keep my figure but then in 40's I started gaining weight. I worked out to try to keep it under control but I have a tendency to eat carbs when I get really stressed or sad and I had a period of about 10 years that were particularly stressful and my weight kept creeping upwards.

I decided enough was enough and started hitting the gym again and avoiding carbs. I lost 70 lbs and looked fabulous, then my mom died and my pet dog died of cancer and I had a boss who was giving me a really rough time at work, plus I was going to school at night while working full-time, etc, etc so I started eating carbs again and gained the weight back. I thought, okay, it's not that bad I can lose the weight again, but then life got in the way again and spoiled my plans. Guess I just need to learn more discipline.

Today I'm still carrying around a lot of that extra weight and consider myself a BBW, and while I've learned to accept my body I know I should lose weight. I get lots of looks and compliments from men so I know at least some men still find me beautiful, even at age 57, but I'm trying once again to lose weight primarily for my health and to have more energy. There are a few activities that I enjoy like hiking, swimming, dancing and riding horses that are easier when I weigh less, so hopefully I've finally learned to avoid the simple carbs and deal with stress in a healthier way like going out for a walk or doing Yoga. LOL, the challenge for me is remembering that statement in a stressful situation. Oh well, I am what I am...

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

Don't know if anyone is interested in a woman's post here, but when I was a teenager I weighed 120 lbs (I'm 5'-8" tall and large boned) and all the way through my 30's I never figured I'd have do any work to keep my figure but then in 40's I started gaining weight. I worked out to try to keep it under control but I have a tendency to eat carbs when I get really stressed or sad and I had a period of about 10 years that were particularly stressful and my weight kept creeping upwards.

I decided enough was enough and started hitting the gym again and avoiding carbs. I lost 70 lbs and looked fabulous, then my mom died and my pet dog died of cancer and I had a boss who was giving me a really rough time at work, plus I was going to school at night while working full-time, etc, etc so I started eating carbs again and gained the weight back. I thought, okay, it's not that bad I can lose the weight again, but then life got in the way again and spoiled my plans. Guess I just need to learn more discipline.

Today I'm still carrying around a lot of that extra weight and consider myself a BBW, and while I've learned to accept my body I know I should lose weight. I get lots of looks and compliments from men so I know at least some men still find me beautiful, even at age 57, but I'm trying once again to lose weight primarily for my health and to have more energy. There are a few activities that I enjoy like hiking, swimming, dancing and riding horses that are easier when I weigh less, so hopefully I've finally learned to avoid the simple carbs and deal with stress in a healthier way like going out for a walk or doing Yoga. LOL, the challenge for me is remembering that statement in a stressful situation. Oh well, I am what I am...

Thanks for contributing, I mentioned in my OP that the female members were welcome to tell their stories too :smile:


I completely understand what you're saying about the demands, responsibilities and vagueries of happenstance getting in the way of your best intentions. I mean if I have bills to pay and I have a choice between work or heading to the gym, I know which one I have to choose. In fact it's not really a choice at all.

 

[ArtofDesire]

Thanks Hilaire

 

[B_Nick8]

You are so lovely, thank you very much, I appreciate you compliments. Though as I say I wasn't fishing for them. :wink::redface:

I know you weren't. If I thought you had, I may have withheld comment. :wink:

 

[joebigcock]

thank god there are others out there. i used to hate my body, now i can deal with it but it can be better. i am very self conscious ever since i was in middle school. im in the gym 6 days a week trying to get a better body. its annoying because females think they have it hard trying to keep a good body, but really we have it equally as hard!

Agreed. I know this is controversial but I think men have it worse to be honest. Well maybe not worse, I don't want to make it like a competition of which gender suffers more but I do think people are a lot more acception of women. While there is pressure for women to be thin such as in modelling, women are constantly told that curvy women are attractive, plus big boobs are glorified, which gives women freedom to be big yet sexy. Men don't have this option. As soon as a man gains any weight, superficial people will write him off. And then not only is there pressure on men to not be fat, but they also are expected to be ridiculously ripped. So to my mind it would be far easier to achieve the female "supposed ideal" than the male... eating less is way easier than being a slave to the gym, just saying