I have it from reliable sources that Obama

Discussion in 'Fictitious Stories' started by b.c., Aug 3, 2009.

  1. b.c.

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    as posted in Birth Certificate Gate:

    “GADZOOKS!” I shouted, leaping wildly from my chair (and causing the other guests to regard me quite suspiciously). But here the sudden revelation weakened my legs, causing me to sink heavily back into the settee. Now steadying myself by clinging desperately to a newly delivered vodka martini (shaken, not stirred), I begged for more.


    “How?” I implored, “How can this be?” to which my canine companion chomped out something about a “mutha shit”. (to be continued)
     
    #1 b.c., Aug 3, 2009
    Last edited: Aug 3, 2009
  2. b.c.

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    “MUTHA SHIT?!?” I gasped, to which he spat out the Meaty Bone he was ravenously gnawing upon.

    “Ship…mother SHIP” was his rather cool reply.

    My initial fear was somewhat abated by the clarification, but I grew no less anxious and inquired further as to what purpose had he come.

    However, here the beast seemed somewhat reticent about providing more, choosing instead to drift in circles sniffing the grass.

    Upon my producing yet another treat he settled down and continued, now speaking of an (undoubtedly heinous) plot to deliver an “agent” into the atmosphere (viral I’d assumed) and thereby infecting the populace with an ingredient he referred to (and rather nonchalantly I might add) as “pee-funk”.

    “The DEVIL you say!!” swooned I. (to be continued)
     
  3. b.c.

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    “The DEVIL you say!!” swooned I.

    This (pestilence?), he added, was to be delivered not by one of those weapons of mass destruction (we’ve all heard so much of) but by a mere gun… a Baupt gun, I think he growled, (though the exact name was difficult to discern, owing to his drooling profusely over the offering I had so recently delivered up).

    Nevertheless, at this point I was completely horrified, and presently, beside myself with terror, I fell back into the cushion crying aloud, “We’ll all be infected with p-funk!!!”


    “Not a bit of it, good fellow,” K_________ dryly replied, with an air of unsettling calm, (now having cast himself sideways upon the grass). “Only those devoid of it.”

    “.......Devoid of it.” I mused.


    (end)
     
    #3 b.c., Aug 5, 2009
    Last edited: Aug 5, 2009
  4. Gonad

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    Oh no! It's over? I suppose it would be impossible to keep up such clever strangeness forever. Now I hope you will at least give us a few words of explanation about what all that meant.
     
  5. b.c.

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    "The bigger the headache, the bigger the pill."
     
  6. Steinweg9

    Steinweg9 New Member

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    He's just a liberal, mocking the GOP. Reduces himself to blathering -- wait until he's in line for his meds and they've run out, even after putting all the old folks at the back of the line. See if he cares where Barry was born then. The deluded media is losing this show faster than ever before.
     
  7. b.c.

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    "When your ups lift you down you're in the Syndrome."
     
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