I just had the worst sex of my life

[invisibleman]

instant boner killer too, we went through 3 condoms because I was so turned off...this is the first time I've haven't been able to get hard...and strangely, I am not the least bit embarassed by it

....and I puked the second I walked in my door...I need my mommy

Maybe you could have asked her to go soak her fishness?

I read that women who have that sort of "turn"...need to feed their "pussy" plain DANNON yogurt. Somehow that is supposed to kill any malodorous turn by creating an well-balanced scent vaginal environment.

 

[D_Petherick_Poundlouder]

Whatever they need to do, they need to do it. There is nothing worse than fouling up one of the best thing in the universe. It is just so disappointing and painful.

 

[invisibleman]

Whatever they need to do, they need to do it. There is nothing worse than fouling up one of the best thing in the universe. It is just so disappointing and painful.

Poor guy. I feel for you.

 

[lucky8]

I read that women who have that sort of "turn"...need to feed their "pussy" plain DANNON yogurt. Somehow that is supposed to kill any malodorous turn by creating an well-balanced scent vaginal environment.

Lol i'll make sure to keep the fridge stocked

 

[Mem]

You wanted pussy and you got skunk.

 

[Mem]

You should have gotten up and said "you know what, I'm not as hungry as I thought I was".:biggrin1:

 

[invisibleman]

Fishy... Just close your eyes and pretend you are at the beach. A rotten nasty smelly dead fish covered beach.

<sarcasm>Ooh, sexy. </sarcasm>

(oh, BTW, I've had worse. I had one who's vagina was so acidic and nasty, it burned my balls)

That wasn't a yeast infection. She gave you the HEAVENSTOMURGATROYD PEZ dispenser.

 

[invisibleman]

You should have gotten up and said "you know what, I'm not as hungry as I thought I was".:biggrin1:

Or, he could've said...

"I could've had a V8 but that was a V shouldn't have ate."

 

[MickeyLee]

pack it with tictacs. turn out the lights. dive back in.

ml

 

[badgirl22]

i'm getting a lousy blowjob from a smelly midget who's lying my bed in my apartment and i'm playing with his tits like his bitch. jeez, how did i get here?
...
moral of the story (i imagine there are probably several)...sometimes the hot, perverse fantasy you have in your filthy mind, should stay a hot, perverse fantasy. instead of a sad, horrifying reality.[/quote]
====================
I"m sorry, i'm sure this was a horrible situation but I am literally ROFLMAO!!!! I'll be roling for days! (at your expense, sorry!)

 

[Zuriel]

Since none of you have read my earlier post here is a clue. If you pick up a lady, before you get in the cab/car/subway back to go back to your place (not hers, please see page 5 of comments for home court performance preference) put your hand down her pants/up her skirt and then smell it (your hand).

 

[lucky8]

sometimes the situation doesn't present itself beforehand...

 

[D_Ivana Dickenside]

lucky, i hope you're feeling not as gross as before. has she tried getting back in touch with you?

 

[D_Petherick_Poundlouder]

pack it with tictacs. turn out the lights. dive back in.

ml

got to write that down. tic tacs...lights...jump back in. sounds promising?

 

[Enid]

gosh i'm sorry lucky8. that's really a subpar experience. here's to better experiences in the future dude.

 

[Guy-jin]

I honestly applaud you for still hitting that.

I mean, I wouldn't have. But damn. Way to go.

 

[MickeyLee]

I honestly applaud you for still hitting that.

I mean, I wouldn't have. But damn. Way to go.

i know. it's one thing to jump on the grenade. another level of dedicated to the task to hump one.

ml

 

[MickeyLee]

got to write that down. tic tacs...lights...jump back in. sounds promising?

which flavor of tic tac ya packing?

ml

 

[D_Petherick_Poundlouder]

I was thinking going with both the plain whites, and the orange.

 

[D_Prudence_Admonition_Drightits]

The whole incident reminds me of when a guy wanted head and he had a cock cheese. Did I go down...HELL NO. You are a brave person.