I just had the worst sex of my life
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MarkLondon
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Careful, Idris, it's a touchy subject that has been at least one person's downfall.
http://www.lpsg.org/112987-post-your-smegma-photos.html
http://www.lpsg.org/113395-austin-blue-smegma-his-downfall.html
Wouldn't wanna lose ya!
http://www.lpsg.org/112987-post-your-smegma-photos.html
http://www.lpsg.org/113395-austin-blue-smegma-his-downfall.html
Wouldn't wanna lose ya!
Sirius Black
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If you just met her, you shave have told her she stank. You already decided you weren't going to see her again after smelling her funk.
Captain Elephant
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Sometimes a little education goes a long way, sort of. Years ago I was dating this woman whom I thought was "THE ONE," except she didn't know squat about personal hygiene. So it was my mission to teach her in the ways of cleanliness. I pulled up in front of the drug store and told her to go in there and ask for some douche.
She came running back to the car with a bag in hand and a huge smile on her face. She told me that she never knew they had all that before, and my motor started running! She said they even had flavors like strawberry, vanilla and cinnamon. My mouth was watering as she recited the list. I couldn't stand it anymore and begged her to tell me what flavor she picked.
Just my luck: tuna fish.
<rimshot>
Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week. Sorry, couldn't resist that golden oldie.
It's not my cup of tea, but years ago there was a groupie who followed our band and loved to go down on the guys after a gig when we were ripe and sweaty. Definitely a kinky little thing.
She came running back to the car with a bag in hand and a huge smile on her face. She told me that she never knew they had all that before, and my motor started running! She said they even had flavors like strawberry, vanilla and cinnamon. My mouth was watering as she recited the list. I couldn't stand it anymore and begged her to tell me what flavor she picked.
Just my luck: tuna fish.
<rimshot>
Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week. Sorry, couldn't resist that golden oldie.
It's not my cup of tea, but years ago there was a groupie who followed our band and loved to go down on the guys after a gig when we were ripe and sweaty. Definitely a kinky little thing.
a tuna sandwich and it ain't even lent yet. I was always lucky, I always went with the theory that if the parts you can see are all clean(hair, face, teeth, clothes), and neat, the box will be too!!
I did have bad sex once(or twice, pls read frther), and it wasn't because of her hygeine. she just laid there, pretty much. the first time, I thought she was too stoned and drunk. the second time she was just stoned. so I asked a couple guys who had dated her. nope, she pretty much just laid there for them too. so I kinda gave up, avoided her. she stalked me, I gave in, we got drunk and stoned, and this time I went down on her for like 45 minutes, I licked lips, clit, tongued everything she had. she was begging me to stick it in her. I thought, Yeah, this is what she needed. I slid in, fucked her for 10 minutes, I blew my load. never lost my hard on(which I could do when younger), slow stroked her, teased her with my head on her clit, after a few minutes, I am now rock hard again, and she says faster, and I go faster and faster and faster. I am rocking on her at superspeed for 15 minutes and she lets out a little moan, but no orgasm. I rock her somemore and blow my 2nd load. by this time I am covered in sweat, she is covered in sweat, the bed is drenched. and she had a moan. I asked if I was not big enough. oh no, that's not it, you are plenty big. some physical problem? no answer. ever had an orgasm??? do you masterbate??? no answer. did someone abuse you??? no answer. I left telling her to get some help or answer my ?'s. she stalked me for a couple months more, and I never fucked her again or said anything more other than, "leave me alone, please." she married a guy who interestingly enough, looked a lot like me. but that didn't last. she re-married, a cowboy type dude, and that lasted about 2 years and she left town. I think someone had abused her at an early age. she was slim, attractive, had nice breasts on her thin frame, and wore wire frame glasses. one night when she was prowling for me, she wore her contact lens, a low neck top, with a push up bra. some guys didn't know who she was. that was our last night together.
I did have bad sex once(or twice, pls read frther), and it wasn't because of her hygeine. she just laid there, pretty much. the first time, I thought she was too stoned and drunk. the second time she was just stoned. so I asked a couple guys who had dated her. nope, she pretty much just laid there for them too. so I kinda gave up, avoided her. she stalked me, I gave in, we got drunk and stoned, and this time I went down on her for like 45 minutes, I licked lips, clit, tongued everything she had. she was begging me to stick it in her. I thought, Yeah, this is what she needed. I slid in, fucked her for 10 minutes, I blew my load. never lost my hard on(which I could do when younger), slow stroked her, teased her with my head on her clit, after a few minutes, I am now rock hard again, and she says faster, and I go faster and faster and faster. I am rocking on her at superspeed for 15 minutes and she lets out a little moan, but no orgasm. I rock her somemore and blow my 2nd load. by this time I am covered in sweat, she is covered in sweat, the bed is drenched. and she had a moan. I asked if I was not big enough. oh no, that's not it, you are plenty big. some physical problem? no answer. ever had an orgasm??? do you masterbate??? no answer. did someone abuse you??? no answer. I left telling her to get some help or answer my ?'s. she stalked me for a couple months more, and I never fucked her again or said anything more other than, "leave me alone, please." she married a guy who interestingly enough, looked a lot like me. but that didn't last. she re-married, a cowboy type dude, and that lasted about 2 years and she left town. I think someone had abused her at an early age. she was slim, attractive, had nice breasts on her thin frame, and wore wire frame glasses. one night when she was prowling for me, she wore her contact lens, a low neck top, with a push up bra. some guys didn't know who she was. that was our last night together.
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