The leather/BDSM/extreme sex community here in SoFla is small and very close-knit, but in many ways is still sorta old guard in relation to Pansexuality: it's generally looked on with suspicion (and a rather heavy-handed disgust) among the gays and is usually an MFF thing among straights. The two mingle only rarely as far as men (both straight and gay) are concerned. As I've always considered myself a latent bisexual (two MF encounters after I came out, both in my 20s) who's never really explored that side of my sexuality, certainly not to the extent that I've enjoyed the delights of MM sexuality over the past 34 years Self-identifying gay has always just been so much easier for me. About four years ago I met a semi-pro Domme who's well known in town. She's probably not bisexual so much as omnisexual, and is very much a figure in our one leather bar here. We've always been cordial, but as I have no interest in the services of a Domme, always kept her at arm's length (much as I do with male Doms/tops). We bumped into each other recently and she really turned on an aggressive charm that she'd never shown me before, actively seeking my attention, both conversationally and in a sexualized way that crossed a new line in our interaction. She also instigated some (illegal, at least in the venue where we were) sexual activity between two guys knowing that I, at the very least, would find the whole thing something of a kick (and I did, of course). Afterward, we exchanged numbers. Since then, we've had a series of conversations that made it quite clear that she would like to explore other types of sexualized behavior between us. I've been cagey but not explicitly negative, though I have some grave reservations about actually taking the plunge. First and foremost is, of course, my HIV status. Though very well-versed in safer sex protocols, I've made it a habit to eschew them in favor of serosorting exclusively with other poz men for the past six or so years. Though I know she's aware of my habits in this regard through mutual contacts, I can't recall ever having discussed this with her specifically and in detail. Obviously such a conversation is required before anything progresses beyond the mutual titty-tugs and deep kissing we've engaged in so far. The second concern I have is somewhat related to the first: I can't envision penetrative sex with her (except for toys) because, again, condoms and I just don't work, and I'm not sure to what degree she'd find that acceptable. Counteracting this is the fact that she frequently engages in lesbian sex, where penetrative sex really doesn't come into play anyway (except, again, for toys). So maybe this really isn't an issue. The third concern is that I've only ever known her as a Domme, and I have absolutely no interest in being dominated; in fact, I'm a Dom myself. She knows this (again, through mutual acquaintances) and I've made it very clear on multiple occasions that I'm a non-versatile top; maybe she's a closet switch. I do know that she's very curious about how extreme I can get, as she's asked me, and the few details I gave her did not put her off in the least. My final concern is that she may be interested in having me join in her business occasionally, which I wouldn't do. As I've stated here frequently, although philosophically I have no issue with prostitution (in fact, I believe it should be legalized), it's not anything I'm interested in pursuing myself. I play for sport and pleasure, not monetary gain, and have no desire to reconsider my position on this matter. Taking things further than they've already gone would break my number one rule as regards serosorting, which poses a serious ethical dilemma for me, and I'd never even consider a mutual masturbation scene with a guy, though I've gotta admit I'm really intrigued. She's smart, funny and very hot in her own, very unique way. FWIW, when I first joined LPSG my percentages were 70/30 gay/straight. Maybe I'll wind up changing them back.