I may have to follow Bbucko's example... tinker with my percentages... possibly

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by D_Tim McGnaw, Sep 11, 2011.

  1. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2009
    Messages:
    7,317
    Likes Received:
    8
    ... and look into tinkering with my percentages.


    I've always enjoyed straight porn, and have had straight sex and found some women attractive. Despite identifying as homosexual that is.

    Yes, yes I know, denial, bicuriosity, it's no biggy, whatever.

    But I think my current sexual interests are fairly specific. I really want to explore heterosexual sex with another straight or bisexual guy, a kind of MFM wing-man. I don't want to fuck the guy necessarily, in fact that really doesn't figure in my fantasy at all. I would love to also explore my sexual feelings with a woman I really feel chemistry with who's also into an MFM scene. And that's complicated because even though I do find many women beautiful I don't necessarily have any sexual spark with many women.

    I suppose it's one of those things which will always remain a fantasy because the necessary factors, and the right people aren't likely to just turn up and converge out of the blue.

    I've always had lots of straight male friends, I just get on well with them for some reason, and actually I've always found it easier to discuss sex with straight male friends than with my gay male friends. This relates to my above disclosure because I have a specific straight male friend who just might have been my perfect wing-man in exploring the stuff I want to explore. We are incredibly close, and also incredibly frank about things, I know he'd have similar fantasies to mine and would be very open to trying to make them into reality, I know he's been in MFM threesomes with other guys before and enjoyed it.

    However times are bad here, and my mate has had to move to the States for his job. And actually a major chunk of my closest male friends have also had to move (mostly abroad) for work. I miss them as friends more than anything else. I also regret not having come to these realisations sooner and approached my mate about them, if nothing else just because he's great to talk to about this kind of thing.


    Not sure why I posted this. I think I just wanted to put it in words and discuss maybe what it's like to be a Gay-bi-curious guy as opposed to so many of the discussions here about the reverse situation and perhaps discuss what it's like to have identified as Gay for most or all of your adult life and then find you may have some latent bi-curiosity or heterosexual fantasies.

    I don't know what this really means for me, not even sure if it means anything at all. But I'm intrigued. :tongue::cool:
     
    #1 D_Tim McGnaw, Sep 11, 2011
    Last edited: Sep 11, 2011
  2. Bbucko

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2006
    Messages:
    7,413
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    58
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Sunny SoFla
    People are just folks, Hilly :cool:

    I came out to my friends while still a virgin, and came out to everybody in the wake of a (failed) crush at 17, having since lost my virginity. Men are simply much lower hanging fruit than women, sexually and emotionally. In my experience, and they're less likely to attach a lasting significant emotion (love) to their sexual appetites. I'm not saying that it's black/white, but no one can deny this basic reality.

    I've had two sexual encounters with women in my life (beyond some extremely heavy petting). The first was when I was 20; we were each curious about the other. But as she was involved in a relationship at the time, I ran zero risk of complications and entanglements. Our curiosity satisfied, we both moved on like ships in the night; I cannot recall ever seeing her again.

    The second was with a woman who worked for the same company I did, but at the warehouse doing customer service, not in a store like me. We flirted shamelessly for months over the phone, which people noticed. That summer the company hosted a booze cruise around Boston Harbor and we bonded with incredible physical chemistry. When we got off the boat we went directly to my place and fucked like rabbits for most of the rest of the night.

    She had her eyes wide open regarding who I was and how I live my life and if it mattered at all it was really to my net advantage because she could have seen me as something to conquest. That may have figured into her thinking, but really I think she just really liked me and needed to scratch that itch. Our encounter did not effect our working relationship one bit, and at the Christmas awards banquet that year she surprised me with a beautiful antique brooch, which I attached to my dinner jacket and which I treasure still.

    So I know that I can function sexually with a woman, and I know that I can bond emotionally with them as well, as women have always figured prominently among my friends. It seems completely natural to me, however, to restrict my sexual attention to men. I've never really tried to cover up or deny my latent bisexuality, but my opportunities (self-imposed limits and a certain ghettoization) to explore it are few and far between.
     
  3. exwhyzee

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2005
    Messages:
    4,578
    Likes Received:
    36
    Gender:
    Male
    I've switched teams theoretically and in reality several times in my life...and I've had the MFM fantasy with a straight guy too. Good thing I never tried to commit to any percentages to tinker with...
     
  4. LaFemme

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 16, 2010
    Messages:
    8,741
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    3,860
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Canada
    Verified:
    Photo
    I am sure that should you decide to explore your sexuality in a MFM situation, you would have no shortage of volunteers! I'd volunteer myself, as I've been unable to fulfill that particular longed for MFM/MMF configuration. Alas, I envision you with a younger more nubile woman. :disappointed:

    However, I know what it's like to wonder. It was something I did for a long time - I had been sexually attracted to the occasional woman since I was a young adult. When I finally was able to explore that part of myself, it was wonderful. I thoroughly enjoyed the sex and the softness of a woman. I don't think that it changed my emotional orientation towards men, but I developed a real appreciation for my own sex and the ability to have real desire and a warm sexual relationship for my own gender.

    My preference is always going to be for men, but I don't mind visiting the occasional woman.
     
  5. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2009
    Messages:
    7,317
    Likes Received:
    8




    Ah you do yourself a terrible disservice! You are gorgeous and I'm ridiculously flattered! :hug: :redface:
     
  6. Not_Punny

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2007
    Messages:
    5,542
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    1,204
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    California
    I've had quite a few threesomes, but mostly with straight guys. In some ways, I think it would be fun/better with a more bi guy. (My guy is semi-bi.)

    If this is something you want to pursue, try finding a guy who LOVES to share/show off his girlfriend. Quite often, the girl will be a show-piece (as opposed to a frump), and this kind of guy is usually open to what you're thinking about.
     
  7. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2009
    Messages:
    7,317
    Likes Received:
    8

    Hmmm, interesting advice. I must say that the connection and sexual chemistry with any prospective female in this situation would have to be strong.

    I think I wary of couples though, not sure why though, perhaps because I feel like it's easy to step into the middle of complicated situations.
     
  8. Intrigue

    Intrigue New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2011
    Messages:
    1,439
    Albums:
    3
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Florida
    I dont think you have to tweak your percentages. I dont think ya need em at all. Like Bbucko said, we're all just people right? I hope ya find a way to make that fantasy a reality. I think Not Punny is on to something though. Finding a couple that you have chemistry may take time but if your looking for it you may find it. Probably your best bet though. Hope it works out for ya!
     
  9. poultrygeist

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2010
    Messages:
    462
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    330
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    somewhere north of the south pole
    Verified:
    Photo
    I'm very interested in this topic. I seem to continually fiddle around with my percentages based on how I'm feeling week to week, month to month. For years I figured I was gay and in the closet, but something keeps drawing me back to a male-female relationship, even though Mrs. Poultry understands my desires and has even encouraged me to find a guy and form emotional closeness with him. I'm amazed at how fluid human sexuality is.

    Thank you for posting this. I can't say exactly how, but I'm very encouraged and intrigued by this. Please keep us updated!
     
  10. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2009
    Messages:
    7,317
    Likes Received:
    8

    Yeah I'm probably being a little too cautious in my concerns about couples. I mean I know plenty of people who are in open or sexually unorthodox relationships and seem to be cool about it all.



    I don't know if there'll ever be anything to update about, who knows, there could be. I suppose I just wanted to put down in words something that's been in the back of my mind recently.

    I've pretty much always identified as Gay ever since I could identify myself sexually. Overwhelmingly my attraction is to men. I just do also have non-homosexual fantasies every now and then is all, right now anyway. :redface:
     
  11. B_debonair87

    B_debonair87 New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2011
    Messages:
    274
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    nyc
    can't deny the power of pussy
     
  12. jjsjr

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 27, 2008
    Messages:
    5,838
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    336
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Wilmington (DE, US)
    I like chicks.
    :lmao:

    Like what you like and don't accept any criticism for any decision you made.
     
  13. MickeyLee

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2008
    Messages:
    11,785
    Likes Received:
    1,793
    Location:
    neverhood
    Mr. Hilaire so wants me :cool::rolleyes::tongue1:

    for true, there is a legitimate response to this thread. i is just overly tired at the moment.

    is an awesome thread, glad Mr. Bbucko's got bumped, and Mr. Hilaire was like wise minded.

    ml
     
    #13 MickeyLee, Sep 12, 2011
    Last edited: Sep 12, 2011
Draft saved Draft deleted