I miss MADAME ZORA!!

Lex

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Matthew said:
Thank you for setting her up for the slam dunk.

And 1!!


to Wit:

Madame_Zora said:

Clearly, the only option is to instruct the bastard to fuck off. Fuck right off.

Do not pass go, do not collect $200- just fuck right off.

And die.

That's right, fuck off and die, you slimy bastard.

Or, if so inclined, run outside and play the ever popular Hide and Go Fuck Yourself™.

Fuck yourself on a train, on a plane, in a box, with a fox...

No matter what the method, the important thing is that you don't forget to fuck yourself.

Fuck yourself and eat beans, for all I care.

Fuck yourself at your grandfather's house. Be sure not to fuck your grandfather... This is a common mistake. It is imperitive that you fuck yourself.

Fuck yourself and send us the pictures, so that we can verify that you have, indeed, completed your mission. WE WILL BE KEEPING TABS ON YOUR "FUCKED YOURSELF" STATUS.

In that vein, allow me to mention the importance of the ensuing paperwork. You can write this off on your taxes if need be. Certain restrictions apply, but not the kinds of restrictions that get you out of fucking yourself.

This is a tradition that is becoming something of a lost art, you see. We need as many young, fresh souls to speak the dead language (if you will,) of fucking yourself as humanly possible. So, if you don't fuck yourself, you will be just like the generations past that have made fucking yourself an endangered species. Just like the pandas¹. You heartless, pandacidal bastard.

Do not confuse this order with Canada's declared Masturbation Month². This is something special, just for you.

It is YOU that must fuck yourself, you Capitalistic fucktard. How dare you come onto OUR site and try to make money?Stop sucking off soldiers in Guantanamo bay, and GO FUCK YOURSELF.



 

Doc

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Wow, I never saw that one.

But did I tell you Zora, that your posts were most definitely the reason I joined up. I don't think, to this day, that I have ever seen someone gain an asshole so fast as when you met them on your bad day.

Hell, it is good to see you back, or around at least. I hope you stick around with us newbies, we all got a thing or two to pick up from you.
 

madame_zora

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Doc, thanks for the support, I actually LIKE n00bs who have something to say!

Lex- you're the greatest! Julianna (my daughter for those of you who don't know) and I stayed up late one night comprising that list, and we laughed until we cried. Thanks for the repost, I should really save that one.
 

Lex

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madame_zora said:
...
Lex- you're the greatest! Julianna (my daughter for those of you who don't know) and I stayed up late one night comprising that list, and we laughed until we cried. Thanks for the repost, I should really save that one.

Zora--it's clearly one of the BEST angry posts you have ever made. A true classic. The fact that Julianna helped you construct it doubled our laughing pleasure!


"..we will keeping tabs on your fucked yourself status..."

LMAO